Deadliest Fiction Wiki


It's royale time again baby. Only this time it's one for the furries/scalies/slimies.

That's it really. Onto the contestants

Amphibian[]

I am Captain Grime, drinker of Bog Grog, grower of beards, and watcher of Suspicion Island!
— Captain Grime

Captain Grime, is a member of the Toad Army. He served as the captain of the garrison stationed at the Toad tower in Frog Valley, overseeing the subjugation of the local frog populace. He commanded over his garrison with fear and threats until capturing and befriending the human Sasha, who helped teach him how to rule through love rather than fear. After the destruction of the tower he was banished and became a fugitive, deciding to overthrow King Andrias the ruler of Amphibia and make toads the dominant force.

  • Barrel's Warhammer: A large two-handed Warhammer. It has a lot of power behind it being able to smash through steel and rock. It also comes fitted with rocket booster on the back of it which can be used to create a shockwave to knock people to the ground.
  • Armour: Grime wears a steel breast plate and steel shoulder plates.

  • Superhuman Physicality: Like with most toads in Amphibia, Grime is a formidable physical fighter. He is superhumanly strong, able to crack a stone pillar with his bare hands, deal blows which stagger a giant heron and throw off a group of Hyenabees which had completely engulfed him. He is also able to jump great heights such as when he jumps up the side of Toad Tower to catch Sasha before she falls.
  • Prehensile Tongue: Grime's tongue is able to extend to great lengths to allow him to grab things from a distance as well as use it to aid his mobility by swinging himself around. It is also pretty strong having been shown able to smash through a rock.
  • Acidic Spit: Grime also has acidic spit which is potent enough to melt through the ground. However he doesn't appear to use this in combat, rather it is just a by-product of his anatomy.

  • Experience
  • Before joining the army, Grime was a gladiator in the Newtopian Coliseum where he did well enough to become the champion. It is unknown exactly how much combat he saw while serving in the Toad Army prior to the series but in series he is regularly shown engaging in combat with a variety of opponents including giant herons, the forces of the Newtopian Army and robots.

    • Combat Ability

    Grime is a very skilled and talented fighter and as previously stated was such a skilled gladiator he was able to become champion which attests to his combat skill. His physicality and skill as a swordsman/Warhammer wielder make him a force to be reckoned with and allows him to take on multiple opponents at once.

    • Stealth

    Captain Grime shows no proficiency or deficiency in traditional stealth. In terms of social stealth he will stand out in a crowd due to being a bipedal toad man.

    • Composure

    Despite his brash demeanour, Grime is actually fairly cool and collected in combat. This is likely owing to the training regime that all toads go through which teaches them to supress their anger and channel it to when they need it most.

    • Brutality
    Grime initially comes across as a brutal and sadistic bully, being willing to feed innocent villagers to a giant venus fly trap just for being politically difficult. As the series goes on however he becomes much more mellow and while he is certainly willing to fight and injury his opponent his willingness to kill seems to have faded.

    Annelid[]

    Groovy!
    — Earthworm Jim

    Earthworm Jim was just a normal earthworm with normal earthworm problems such as avoiding being eaten by birds and digging in dirt. That all changed when one day a high tech super suit fell from the cosmos and landed on a farm where Jim was residing. Climbing inside the suit to escape from a flock of hungry crows, the powerful atomic particles inside the suit caused him to evolve and grow into a super intelligent (well for a worm) sentient being. From that day on he became an adventurer, travelling throughout the galaxy and fighting evil doers who were after the power of the suit as well as trying to rescue Princess What's-Her-Name.

    • Super-Suit: The source for pretty much all of Jim's abilities is the mysterious suit that fell from the sky on that fateful day. It is one of the most high-tech and powerful gadgets in the whole Earthworm Jim universe and has the following abilities;
      • Superhuman Strength: The suit gives Jim incredible strength allowing him to snap through chains, match blows with large aliens and monsters and even once being shown allowing him to uproot an entire tree and use it as a weapon.
      • Nigh-Indestructability: The suit itself is also nearly impervious to damage and can survive virtually anything thrown at it including on several occasions being squashed entirely flat but being able to reform back into it's normal shape. It can also survive in space as well as operate underwater.
      • Inflation: Jim can also cause the suit to inflate to massive proportions although this usually ends up being more of a hindrance than a help. However by inflating and then deflating the suit, Jim can make himself squishy enough to slip out of tight restraints.
      • Hand Detachment: The hands of the Super-Suit can detach from the rest of it and operate separately, allowing Jim to punch enemies from a distance.
    • Plasma Blaster: The Super-Suit also comes equipped with a Plasma Gun which fires lasers. It has a clip size of 100 rounds however when the counter hits zero it will slowly recharge back up.
    • Pocket Rocket: Jim's main form of transportation across the galaxy is his Pocket Rocket. Stored somewhere within the suit it is a small personal rocket ship which Jim uses to travel at high speeds, both in space on on earth.

  • Worm Physiology While nearly all of Jim's abilities are linked to the suit he has some things that are unique to him. His body's natural stretchiness has been greatly increased by his evolution allowing him to use his head to whip enemies, lasso onto ledges to give him greater mobility and and slow his descent by acting as a propeller. If separated from the suit he is still able to think and move about freely, often using his body as a coil to spring about and using his mouth and tail to grab onto objects.

  • Experience
  • Jim has a wide variety of experience fighting aliens, robots and other weird and wonderful creatures ever since he got the suit and is almost constantly under attack from those who wish to take the suit from him.

    • Combat Ability

    Jim himself isn't that great of a combatant, usually just brute forcing his way through fights or blasting enemies with his plasma gun. That being said Super-Suit gives Jim a lot of physical strength and durability in battle so it makes him a difficult opponent to deal with despite his lack of talent.

    • Stealth

    Jim is not remotely stealthy in a traditional sense and barges his way into fights and encounters as loudly as possible. In terms of social stealth he stands out due to being a sentient worm in a space suit and his bombastic nature only makes him stick out more. Separated from the suit he fairs better as he can pass as just a regular earthworm.

    • Composure

    Jim is very naïve, impulsive and emotional and is not particularly difficult to trick or distract in combat. On occasion he can be level headed and cunning but usually only when faced with someone even dumber than him.

    • Brutality
    While Jim loves to lay a beatdown on his enemies he's too kind hearted to kill them being satisfied with merely giving them a hiding so they will leave him alone.

    Arachnid[]

    This is a moment to be savoured my sweetling. Not rushed over. Not fumbled. But look. You've spoiled it now. You've robbed it of it's fun.
    — Madame Mist

    Madame Mist is a Child of the Spider, a mysterious tightly knit group of sorcerers who specialise in using spiders in combat. For centuries Madame Mist and her fellow co-conspirators have been plotting to elevate sorcerers to rule over the mortals with a plan in place to goad the Warlocks into attacking a mortal city and sorcerers in to save the day. As part of this aim she was able to manoeuvre her way into being an elder in the Irish Sanctuary and get the sanctuary relocated to Roarhaven, where she can better complete her plans.

    • Spider Creation: As a member of the Children of the Spider, Madame Mist has the ability to create and weaponize spiders at will. In Mist's case the spiders seem to reside within her body in place of blood as when injured spiders spray out of her wounds instead of blood. The most common type of spider produced are black spiders and while they are no bigger than a normal spider, Mist can create hundreds and thousands of them at once. The sheer volume is enough to overwhelm and pin down a person and the spiders will attempt to crawl into their mouth and nose to suffocate them. They will also inject their target with venom and while one spider bite is not lethal or even dangerous thousands of them quickly add up to make a person sluggish. Madame Mist can also create smaller white spiders with an even more potent venom, one bite from them and the victim is almost instantly paralysed with death not long after.
    • Superhuman Strength: Mist has also shown to have superhuman strength able to overpower a remnant possessed Tanith Low and throw her across a room and strike someone with enough force to send them flying.

  • Experience
  • Madame Mist, like many sorcerers, is centuries old however the actual extent of her combat experience is unknown. Mist rarely engages in combat during the series only doing so when forced into it and she seems to prefer operating behind the scenes rather than actively taking part in combat.

    • Combat Ability

    That being said when she does fight Madame Mist has proven herself to be a pretty skilled combatant. She was easily able to defeat Tanith Low in a fight and was able to match and surpass China Sorrows, a four hundred year old sorcerer with a length combat history in a battle, forcing her to resort to a suicide move to defeat her.

    • Stealth

    Mist shows no proficiency or deficiency in traditional stealth. In terms of social stealth she stands to stand out in a crowd because of her unusual attire.

    • Composure

    Mist is incredibly calm and unfazed at all times, barely ever raising her voice or showing anger or annoyance at anything and even when severely injured is able to maintain her composure. The only time she ever breaks her calmness is at the loss of a large number of her spiders.

    • Brutality
    Mist is willing to do anything in order to further her goals and has no qualms with killing in order to do so.

    Bird[]

    If I was your punishment, you'd already be dead.
    — Kassandra

    Kassandra is one of the possible protagonists of Assassin's Creed Odyssey. Born to Myrrine and Nikolaos of Sparta, she was descended from Leonidas I on her mother's side and as such was expected to be a great warrior from a young age. When Kassandra was five her younger brother Alexios was prophesied by the Chorale of Delphi to bring about the downfall of Sparta and as such was sentenced to be sacrificed at Mount Taygetos. However as the priest was about to perform the drop Kassandra attempted to stop the sacrifice and in doing so pushed them both to their deaths. Condemned as a traitor, Nikolaos reluctantly threw Kassandra from the mountain as well but she survived the fall, fleeing into the ocean on a boat. She washed up on the island of Kephallonia and was adopted by a merchant named Marcus, growing up doing errands for him and starting a career as a Misthios. As an adult she encountered a man named Elpenor who tasked her with assassinating the Wolf of Sparta, her own father. After defeating him in combat and learning he was not in fact her father, she returned to Elpenor only to be betrayed by him. Discovering Elpenor was part of the Cult of Kosmos, a group of people trying to control the Greek world she made it her mission to root out the members and destroy the cult's influence as well as trying to find out her true parentage.

    • Spear of Leonidas: Given to her by her mother when she was only a child, the Spear of Leonidas is the broken spear head of the spear used by Leonidas during the battle of Thermopylae. About a foot long and imbued with Isu technology it is far more durable than any standard spear, able to block powerful blows from heavy weapons. It can be used to stab or slash and is often dual wielded by Kassandra alongside another weapon.
    • Nikolaos' Sword: Taken from her adopted father after defeating him in combat, Kassandra carries his sword as his weapon of choice. It appears to be based on the Kopis and so would have been about 25 inches long and would have served primarily as a one handed slashing weapon.
    • Dory Spear: The main weapon of a Spartan, Kassandra would've been well versed in using a Dory Spear. Between 7 and 9 feet long it comes with an iron leaf shaped spear head and a bronze butt spike. As a phalanx weapon it would have primarily served as a thrusting weapon although it could also be used for slashing as well.
    • Hunting Bow: While made for hunting wildlife, Kassandra would also use this bow in combat as well. It was a wooden bow with iron tipped arrows.
    • Spartan Armour: For this battle Kassandra will be wearing Spartan armour. It consists of a bronze curiass, bronze gauntlets, bronze leg greaves and capped off with a bronze Corinthian helmet.
    • Ikaros: Ikaros is Kassandra's pet eagle. Ikaros will fly above and ahead of Kassandra and she can telepathically see the world from Senu's perspective, allowing her to mark off targets, locate and gauge the ability of enemies and generally give a bird's eye view of an area. Ikaros can also aid in combat by swooping down and harassing a person, giving Kassandra an opportunity to strike.

  • Superhuman Strength and Durability:  Kassandra has been granted superhuman strength and durability from the Spear of Leonidas. This allows her to overpower opponents much physically larger and more muscular than herself and take powerful blows from creatures such as Cyclops but she still can be hurt and killed by normal weaponry. These physical advantages are also tied to the Spear so if she should lose it she would not longer have this superhuman physicality. Furthermore it also prevents her from taking "fall damage" so leaping from large heights will not harm her.
  • Skills: As with her physicality, Kassandra also has magical abilities she can get from the spear of Leonidas. These are performed via using adrenaline which for all intents and purposes is mana. Kassandra regains adrenaline in combat by striking her opponents. Unless specified otherwise all below abilities take up one bar of adrenaline with Kassandra starting with four bars. The abilities she has for this battle are as follows;
    • Shadow of Nix: When out of conflict Kassandra can become totally invisible although attacking or bumping into someone will reveal her. This ability slowly drains adrenaline over time.
    • Ring of Chaos: A sudden shocking blast which stuns enemies within a 3 metre radius.
    • Flaming Attacks: Kassandra applies burning damage to her melee weapons and arrows for 15 second.
    • Venomous Attacks: Kassandra applies poison damage to her melee weapons and arrow for 15 seconds. Poison does damage over time and also reduces the opponents attack strength.
    • Rain of Destruction: Kassandra rains down a volley of arrows in a 3 metre radius.
    • Spread Shot: Kassandra fires three arrows at once.
    • Predator Shot: This skill allows Kassandra to control the movement of her arrow after it has been fired for greater accuracy.
    • Spartan Kick: Kassandra delivers a powerful kick which sends her opponent flying. The move itself is never lethal although kicking someone off or into something will still hurt them.

  • Experience
  • Kassandra has a lot of combat experience, having fought all across the Greek world as a Misthios which ranged from fighting against unskilled bandits, to trained Athenian and Spartan soldiers, other powerful mercenaries looking for the bounty on her head, the warriors and guards of the Cult of Kosmos and dozens of supernatural creatures such as Cyclops and Minotaur.

    • Combat Ability

    Trained from a very young age to be a Spartan and also receiving training later in life as a Misthios, Kassandra is a very skilled combatant. As well as being to defeat trained greek soldiers and bounty hunters she is also capable of matching toes with monsters such as cyclops, minotaurs and even Medusa herself.

    • Stealth

    While an mercenary by trade, Kassandra is also skilled at stealth and is able to sneak in and out of heavily guarded compounds. She also has the Shadow of Nix ability which allows her to move around unseen. In terms of social stealth Kassandra is just a normal looking woman so wouldn't stand out in a crowd.

    • Composure

    Kassandra is neither particularly composed nor particularly uncomposed.

    • Brutality
    Kassandra is willing to kill to achieve her goals although she does not go out of her way to brutalise her opponent.

    Crustacean[]

    You would hunt the hunter? You forget your place. You are prey.
    — Kraab

    Kraab is a robotic mercenary from Piscciss, and a frequent enemy of the superhero Ben Tennyson. A veteran of the Pyros-Piscciss war, Kraab was severely wounded during the war and had almost his entire body replaced with mechanical parts. With the war ended, Kraab became a ruthless and vicious bounty hunter. On one mission, Kraab was hired by Vilgax along with Tetrax and SixSix to obtain the Omnitrix. Kraab put up a fight against Ben Tennyson, defeating his Ghostfreak form with the technology of his weaponry, but lost when the hero used his Gray Matter form to destroy him from within.

    • Claw: Kraab's most prominent feature is his gigantic clawed right arm. Naturally one of his major forms of attack is using it to crush and rip his opponents, with his claw being sharp enough to cut through steel. It also has a blaster scope at the base of the pincher which Kraab can use to fire a multitude of projectiles. These include;
      • Laser Beams: Lasers which can be fired either as single beams or as one continuous beam. Has enough power to knock a person clean off their feet.
      • Electric Beam: A beam of pure electric. Power level unknown.
      • Anti-Intangibility Liquid: An orange liquid chemical which Kraab can use to negate the intangibility of opponents such as when he uses it against Ghost Freak.
      • Purple Gas: A tear gas like substance.
    • Thermal Vision: Kraab is able to manually switch his vision to be able to see thermal signatures, helping him to detect opponents who can turn invisible.
    • Sword: Kraab also carries with him a sword. He never uses the fucking thing but he has it so it gets a mention.

  • Mechanically Enhanced Body: Kraab has displayed several feats of superhuman strength such as being able to crush and rip metal with his claw as well as easily toss around large heavy opponents such as Diamondhead and Kevin 11. He is also very durable able to survive being crushed into the ceiling with a hydraulic lift and being thrown through buildings and walls. He can also spin his head around fully 360 degrees which makes attempting to attack him from behind difficult. He also possesses razor sharp pinchers for feet which he can use both as an offensive weapon and also as a means of transportation. By rotating his lower body rapidly he can burrow through the ground at high speeds and this is his preferred method of mobility when not in combat.

  • Experience
  • Kraab is a veteran of the Piscciss-Pyros wars as well as having been working as a bounty hunter for an unspecified amount of time afterwards. He is presumably fairly successful as well, as he was short listed by Vilgax in order to try and retrieve the Omnitrix.

    • Combat Ability

    Kraab is a huge, hulking mechanical crab and he is a more than capable opponent. Using his great strength and variety of projectile weapons he is quick to adapt to the different alien forms Ben throws at him and outmuscle and overpower them.

    • Stealth

    Kraab shows no proficiency or deficiency in traditional stealth. In terms of social stealth, he's a giant metallic crab so stands out massively in a crowd.

    • Composure

    Kraab is neither particularly composed nor particularly uncomposed.

    • Brutality
    Kraab has no problem with mutilating his opponents and was more than willing to sever a ten year old child's arm to get the Omnitrix. However as a bounty hunter for the most part he tries to bring his captives in alive and a lot of his arsenal leans towards incapacitating his opponents rather than killing them. However judging by his aggressive and at times sadistic personality it is likely he has few qualms with killing an opponent should be need to.

    Fish[]

    Rest my children. For soon our Mardi Gras will commence. Your time is coming.
    — Baron Samedi

    Baron Samedi is a Cracher-Mortel in the employ of the House of Kronenberg. Arriving in Portland he began creating an army of zombies, which he creates via a poisonous spit which causes death like symptoms. While his plan initially seemed to be to cause random havoc and mayhem the creation of the zombies was merely a ruse to lure a Nick Burdhardt, a Grimm, into a trap with the aim of turning him into a zombie for the royals to use for their own nefarious purposes.

    • Sword Cane: Baron Samedi always carries a cane around with him with a sword hidden within which he can draw out and use as a weapon.

  • Poison Spit: Baron Samedi is a Cracher-Mortel, a fish like Wesen which has the ability to create a tetrodotoxin which they spit onto their victims. This poison shuts down their central nervous system and heart cells which paralyses them and makes them appear as though they are dead. However atropine and scopolamine toxins reanimate the victim in a permanently zombified state. This process appears to be fairly quick as Samedi was able to gather a large number of zombies in only a few hours. After reanimation the zombies enter a rage like state and will attack anyone they come across, with the exception of the Cracher-Mortel who can control them as he pleases. The zombies are no more powerful than any normal person although they do appear to have a much higher pain threshold, as one was shown falling from a two story building and still continue to go on a rampage and others have been shown shrugging off physical attacks like punches, although they can still be killed by normal means such as gunshot wounds.
  • Superhuman Physicality: Baron Samedi is a very physically capable individual despite his apparent old age and is able to fight on level terms with a Grimm, who are much physically stronger than a normal person. He also seemed to have no trouble leaping across shipping containers and shrugged off being tackled off the top of one with seemingly no injury.

  • Experience
  • Baron Samedi is an old man and the confidence with which he goes about his work suggests he has experience in creating zombies before. Quite how versed he is in combat is unknown as he can incapacitate nearly anyone with one spit so it's unlikely he's been in much direct combat.

    • Combat Ability

    Baron Samedi only has one brief fight against Nick but even that short fight shows that he is a skilled fighter. Despite being considerably older than him he was able to fight him on level terms and even get the upper hand over him.

    • Stealth

    Baron Samedi doesn't really try to be stealthy at all, brazenly taking his victims out of hospitals and infected a bus of people in broad daylight. That being said as the plan was to lure Nick into a trap, stealth was hardly the main objective. In terms of social stealth Samedi tends to stand out because of his unusual attire and general demeanour.

    • Composure

    Baron Samedi is very confident in everything he does and maintains a positive attitude and demeanour while enacting his plan. The only time he showed any surprise was after his poison spit had no effect on an undead Nick.

    • Brutality
    The Baron has no qualms using his poison spit on anyone at any time and seems to take a sick glee in the pain the process causes to his victims.

    Insect[]

    I am the Pain! I shall send you to a world of anguish beyond your imagination! Let's get started!
    — The Pain

    The Pain, also known as the Hornet Soldier, was a member of Cobra Unit who were a special force team created during WW2 in order to aid the allies. Made up of various super soldiers, they were the main reason for the allies victory but disbanded shortly after the end of the War. The Pain would later reunite with his former team under the Boss in 1964 this time working for the USSR to capture Nikolai Stepanovich Sokolov, a defector from the USSR to the USA.

    • Tommy Gun: The Pain makes use of a Thompson Sub Machine Gun in combat. It has a 30 round drum magazine of .45 ACP rounds. It has a range of 150 metres, a muzzle velocity of 285 m/s and a 600-750 rpm firing speed.
    • Grenades: The Pain also makes use of grenades as part of his arsenal. Rather than throwing them however he prefers to use his hornets to carry the grenade to his opponent and drop it on them.
    • Pheromone Vials: The Pain carries on his person several pheromone vials. He uses these to direct swarms of hornets at his opponents but throwing the vials at them.
    • Microbombs: The Pain, like all the members of Cobra Unit, is imbued with explosives that are triggered by his death. This is prevent any enemy who kills him from retrieving any of his equipment or classified knowledge he might have on his person.

  • Control over Hornets: The Pain's special ability is the power to control hornets. This ability was given to him during experiments into creating super soldiers where he was infected with parasites which secrete heterogeneous pheromones from his body, giving him the ability to attract and control the hornets who see him as their "queen". He uses these hornets in a variety of ways during combat including;
    • Stinging: The hornets are, as you would expect, able to sting people and while one hornet sting may not cause too many problems, the Pain's ability to control whole swarms of them means they can cause some serious damage if enough of them sting a single target.
    • Carrying Objects: The Pain also uses the Hornets to carrying things for him, such as his Tommy Gun and grenades. They can also be used to lift an opponent into the air.
    • Shielding: The Pain can also use his hornets to create a shield around himself to protect himself from damage. This enables him to block small arms fire however more powerful weaponry such as shotguns or grenades can break through and hurt him.
    • Bullet Bees: As well as his regular hornets the Pain also incubates special hornets called Bullet Bees inside of his own body. He can release these bees from his mouth by removing his balaclava. These hornets are much faster than the regular hornets and upon contact with the enemy they burrow into their body and slowly eat them from the inside.
    • Doppelganger: The Pain can create an exact duplicate of himself out of hornets in order to fool his enemies.
  • Pain Resistance: One of the parasites inside of the Pain means that whenever he feels pain he is boosted with a boost of adrenaline in order to counteract the effects, giving him enhanced resistance to pain.
  • Peak Level Agility: Despite his large size, the Pain has been shown able to perform several acrobatic leaps and flips.

    • Experience

    The Pain served in WW2 as part of Cobra Unit, who were tasked with completing all the dirty work that regular infantry could not be called upon to complete. In is unknown what he was doing both prior to and after the formation of Cobra Unit but it is safe to assume he was active as a soldier or mercenary.

    • Combat Ability

    The Pain mostly uses his hornets to fight and he uses them in a variety of creative ways. His huge size and agility suggests that would be a formidable close quarters combatant although he is never shown engaging in it during the series.

    • Stealth

    In terms of traditional stealth, the Pain can use his hornets to disguise his movements but aside from that is not shown to be particularly adept in stealth. That being said his role in Cobra Unit was infiltration so one can assume he is at least somewhat stealthy. In terms of social stealth, he would stand out in a crowd both due to his large size and severe scarring from thousands of hornet stings.

    • Composure

    The Pain moves erratically and spends a lot of time shouting out his attacks while he's doing them so his mental state is clearly not all that great.

    • Brutality
    As a career soldier, The Pain has no qualms with killing an opponent in order to complete his mission.

    Mammal[]

    Not your fault?! Who filled my head with dreams? Who drove me to training until my bones cracked? Who denied me my DESTINY?
    — Tai Lung

    Tai Lung was abandoned as a baby outside the gates of the Jade Palace, where he was taken in and raised by Shifu. Showing a great aptitude for Kung Fu even as a child, his head were filled with dreams of becoming the Dragon Warrior, a prophesied Kung Fu Master who would have limitless power granted to him by the Dragon Scroll. However Oogway sensed the darkness in his heart and refused to proclaim him the Dragon Warrior. This denial drove Tai Lung into a fit of rage and he laid waste to the valley, attempting to take the scroll by force. He was stopped by Oogway however and was imprisoned in a maximum security prison for 20 years until one day he managed to escape and return to the valley to claim what he believes to be rightfully his.

    • Superhuman Strength: Tai Lung has immense physical strength, able to collapse a stone building with a single kick, hurl giant crossbow arrows with great force, smash the ground into a giant boulder and then throw said boulder, kick someone with enough force to send them flying the entire length of a rope bridge and easily grab and throw around opponents larger than himself.
    • Superhuman Agility: Tai Lung has also showcased great agility, able to leap great heights in a single bound most notably when leaping up falling debris to escape from the pit he was imprisoned in. He also makes use of his agility in combat, making use of flying kicks and punches.
    • Superhuman Speed: Tai Lung is also incredibly quick, able to cover the distance from the bottom of the stairs leading to the Jade Palace to the gates in the blink of an eye. In a combat sense this also allows him to dodge various attacks and move quick enough to incapacitate highly trained kung fu masters before they can react.
    • Superhuman Durability: On top of all his other physical strengths Tai Lung is also incredibly durable, quickly recovering from the attacks of Po and the Furious Five, deflecting a giant crossbow bolt with his bare hands and being able to fight even after being thrown through a stone wall and having stone tiles slammed into his face at high speed.
    • Nerve Attack: Tai Lung's signature attack is the same one used by Oogway to defeat him which involves targeting the nerves of his opponents. By jabbing the main artery by the heart he is able to paralyse an opponent through chi manipulation, requiring an experienced Kung Fu Master like Shifu to be able to release them from their paralysis. However this technique does not work well against opponents naturally protective physiques such as a thick hide or excessive body fat.
    • Leopard Style: Tai Lung's chosen Kung Fu Discipline is Leopard Style. This style is based around hanging back in combat, blocking and dodging their opponents attacks while waiting for an opening to strike with ferocity. It also relies on immense upper body strength and staying crouched low to the ground. Tai Lung makes use of his aforementioned physical abilities to strike swiftly and brutally when given the opportunity.
    • Snow Leopard Physiology: Tai Lung has razor sharp claws primarily used for helping him climb although they can also be used as an offensive weapon. His tail is also very dexterous and he was able to use it to free himself from his restraints by manipulating a feather to unlock the bodysuit he was wearing.

  • Experience
  • Tai Lung was trained from childhood in Kung Fu, being the first person to master the 1000 scrolls of Kung Fu and pushing his body to breaking point to hone his physical ability. His actual combat experience however is fairly limited, restricted to a brief rampage through the valley as well as fights against the Furious Five, Shifu and Po although all of these were seasoned Kung Fu experts. However he likely also has had hundreds if not thousands of practice bouts against Shifu and other students so his lack of practical combat experience isn't necessarily a disadvantage.

    • Combat Ability

    As touched upon in the Experience edge, Tai Lung is an incredibly gifted martial artist and was able to easily beat his former master Shifu in a fight as well as fighting with and overcoming the Furious Five, the most skilled Kung Fu Masters of the time, all at once. He was ultimately defeated by Po but he was still able to fight him on even terms for most of the battle and was undone largely by Po's body fat blocking his nerve attack.

    • Stealth

    Tai Lung shows no proficiency or deficiency in traditional stealth. In terms of social stealth Tai Lung is a anthropomorphic snow leopard so will be noticeable in a crowd.

    • Composure

    Despite his aggressive fighting style Tai Lung is actually fairly composed in battle and is able to think rationally in a fight. He is however prone to fits of anger especially in relation to his rejection as the Dragon Warrior or when he is momentarily outmanoeuvred in a fight.

    • Brutality
    Tai Lung is willing to do anything to achieve his goals and will lay a brutal beat-down on anyone who gets in his way, up to and including paralysing them. He does however show restraint when it comes to killing his opponents, sparing the Furious Five after defeating them, although he was perfectly willing to try and murder Shifu for revenge.

    Mollusc[]

    Intelligence is not a privilege, it's a gift. And you use it for the good of mankind.
    — Otto Octavius

    Otto Octavius, also known as Doctor Octopus, is the main villain of Spider Man 2. A gifted scientist, Otto dedicated his life towards trying to build a sustainable fusion power reactor. In pursuit of this goal he also invented a quartet of AI mechanical arms which he kept in check with an inhibitor chip. However disaster struck when during a demonstration the reactor overloads and starts to collapse and his refusal to stop it lead to his wife being killed and the inhibitor chip being fried. Now under the influence of the AI, Otto becomes single minded in his pursuit of recreating the reactor, turning to crime in order to get the funding and materials he needs.

    • Mechanical Tentacles: Initially created in order to help in the creation of the power reactor once the inhibitor chip is destroyed, his mechanical tentacles are also a powerful weapon. Otto has four of these tentacles and they have the following abilities;
      • Superhuman Strength: The tentacles are incredibly strong able to pick up a lift cars, rip through the reinforced steel safes in a bank and overpower Spider-Man in a direct fight.
      • Superhuman Speed: The tentacles are also very fast, able to keep up with the superhumanly quick Spider-Man.
      • Extending: While the tentacles are one and a half metres normally, Otto is able to extend them up to four metres long should he need to.
      • Durability: The tentacles have proven to be very durable and able to stand up to a lot of punishment such as being smashed through brick walls and slammed into cars, cushioning Otto from damage. They are also designed to be completely immune to heat and magnetism.
      • Dexterity: As well as being physically powerful the tentacles are also capable of very precise movements. They are able to catch and hold small objects and perform complicated tasks. In combat scenarios they are also able to throw objects with great accuracy as a ranged attack.
      • Blade: Each tentacle has a blade within the palm of it's grabber, which can be extended and retracted at will.
      • Mobility Enhancement: Otto is granted a great deal of mobility because of the tentacles. They allow him to climb up the side of walls as well as move much quicker than a normal person.
      • Sentience: The tentacles have a built in super intelligent AI and this means they are able to react to things even if Otto doesn't necessarily notice them. On multiple occasions, someone attempts a sneak attack on Otto, only for the tentacles to jump to his defence. They will also automatically react to protect Otto from blunt force damage.

  • Above Average Durability: While the mechanical tentacles give him a lot of protection against damage by shielding him, Otto himself is also pretty tough. Spider-Man managed to hit him several times directly in his torso and he is able to shrug it off and keep fighting and he is electrocuted on two separate occasions and apart from being knocked out, is completely unharmed.

  • Experience
  • Otto's combat experience is limited to a very brief crime spree during which the only credible threat he faces is Spider-Man.

    • Combat Ability

    However despite his lack of combat experience, Otto is still a formidable opponent. His mechanical arms give him a lot of physical power and he is able to fight and overpower Spider-Man in most of their encounters.

    • Stealth

    When it comes to traditional stealth Otto has no skill whatsoever and in fact he doesn't even attempt to be stealthy at all, preferring to simply fight his opponent head on. In terms of social stealth, he can fit in fairly well as long as he keeps the tentacles hidden which he has been shown doing by wearing a long trench coat. However, obviously, once he whips them out and starts walking about he sticks out like a sort thumb.

    • Composure

    Otto is in a constant battle with the AI in the tentacles and when they are in full control they make him increasingly unhinged. While he can focus and keep his cool most of the time the tentacles can sometimes make him act irrationally.

    • Brutality
    While Otto himself is not a killer at heart, the tentacles make him much more violent and he is more than willing to kill those who stand in his way such as Spider-Man. He is also perfectly fine using civilians as collateral damage however he doesn't go out of his way to kill people and several times instead simply knocks the person out.

    Reptile[]

    I seek to raise my status by rooting out heresy so that I may become a dragon. That's the reason I became an adventurer.
    — Lizard Priest

    Lizard Priest is a lizardman and silver ranked adventurer. Sent as a representative of his people, he joined forces with High Elf Archer and Dwarf Shaman as they sought out Goblin Slayer, requiring his services to help deal with a Goblin infestation in Elf lands. After aiding him in killing the goblins as well as an Ogre who was leading them, Lizard Priest later joins Goblin Slayer on further adventurers, such as dealing with a goblin infestation under a city, helping defend a frontier village from the forces of a goblin lord and assaulting a goblin fortress. Lizard Priest's goal to achieve enough power and renown to eventually ascend and become a naga, the beings that Lizard Priest and his kin worship.

    • Swordclaw: Lizard Priest's main weapon is a scimitar like blade which is sharp enough to slice through flesh and bone with ease.
    • Fangs: Lizard Priest carries around a pocket of fangs which are used as the catalyst for his summoning spells.

  • Superhuman Strength: Lizard Priest is incredibly strong able to pick up and toss goblins around with ease, push a large stone coffin to block a door and block the attack of an ogre.
  • Lizardman Physiology: Lizard Priest has sharp fangs and claws which he can use to rip and tear through flesh. His large tail can also be used as a club in combat, swiping away goblins with a powerful swing.
  • Poison Resistance: Lizard Priest is mostly unaffected by toxic vapours.
  • Miracles: As he is a priest, Lizard Priest is able to cast miracles to aid him in combat. All miracles require a short prayer before activating and in the case of his summoning spells require the use of fangs as catalysts in order to use. Lizard Priest is able to utilise 4 miracles a day and they are as follows;
    • Dragontooth Warrior: Lizard Priest scatters several fangs on the floor which he uses to summon a bipedal skeletal lizardman to aid him in combat. The warrior has similar physical abilities to Lizard Priest himself and although it is summoned without weapons, Lizard Priest will often summon a spare blade for it as well.
    • Swordclaw Summon: Lizard Priest uses a fang to create a swordclaw, either to use for himself or give to his Dragontooth Warrior.
    • Refresh: A healing spell which can be used on either Lizard Priest on an ally.
    • Partial Dragon: A spell which increases Lizard Priest's strength by doubling his muscle mass enabling him to perform feats above his already impressive physical strength.
    • Communicate:A spell which allows Lizard Priest to understand and communicate through another person's language.
    • Rust: A spell which causes nearby equipment to rust and deteriorate. Lizard Priest is able to control which items are effected by said spell.
    • Sharp Tooth: A spell which allows Lizard Priest to sharpen his weapons.

  • Experience
  • Lizard Priest is a silver ranked adventurer which is the third highest rank after Gold and Platinum. This means he has significant combat experience and was renowned enough to be selected by his people as their representative. During the series he takes part in many fights alongside Goblin Slayer although they are mostly against fairly weak goblins with the occasional battle against something strong like a Goblin Champion or Ogre.

    • Combat Ability

    Lizard Priest hails from a culture based around combat and warfare and as such is the main frontline fighter of the group. He is easily able to fight large hordes of goblin, take on much larger and stronger hobgoblins and has even been shown killing a Demon albeit with help from Dwarf Shaman and High Archer Elf.

    • Stealth

    Lizard Priest shows no proficiency or deficiency in traditional stealth. In terms of social stealth Lizard Priest will stand out in a crowd owing to being a giant bipedal lizard.

    • Composure

    Lizard Priest is a calm and collected individual, rarely raising his voice and acting as the voice of reason amongst his brasher colleagues. This extends to combat where Lizard Priest always keeps a cool head and never panics even when the party is being overwhelmed by a horde of Goblins.

    • Brutality
    Lizard Priest has no qualms slaughtering goblins, hobgoblins and demons in battle even being willing to rip them apart with his bare hands. However it is unknown how this brutality would translate while fighting things other than monsters.

    Zooplankton[]

    When I think about Jolyne... I feel courage welling up inside me. This is what memories are about... this is my intellect.
    — Foo Fighters

    Foo Fighters, also known simply as F.F, is a sentient colony of Plankton, inhabiting the body of Atroe. F.F was "born" after Enrico Pucci gave a Stand disc to a colony of Plankton, in order to guard the stash of discs he had obtained and stores in a warehouse out in the swamps. Having no other purpose in life they carried out this duty which eventually lead to them killing and devouring two prisoners who got near the discs as part of their prison duties. This lead F.F into direct contact with Jolyne, who had volunteered for a search party to try and find her father's disc which she believed was stashed with the others. After fighting and being defeated by Jolyne, F.F inhabited the body of Atroe, a member of the search part who had been killed previously, in order to protect and help Jolyne, whom she had come to admire after being spared by her.

    • Plankton Physiology: As F.F is made up of hundreds of thousands of microscopic plankton, it gives them several unique physical traits;
      • Invulnerability to Damage: F.F is virtually impervious to conventional attack. As long as even one single plankton survives, F.F can continue to reproduce and regain their strength.
      • Body Invasion: F.F is able to inhabit the bodies of humans and exert a degree of control over them such as when they force a prisoner to spew out the water they ingested or when they literally reformed the exploded body of Atroe to inhabit them. They are also able to contort their body in ways a normal human could not, such as being able to squeeze themselves into a hose pipe.
      • Dependency on Water: F.F requires water in order to survive and without it the Plankton that makes up their body will die. When inhabiting the body of another person F.F does not require a constant supply of water and can move about more freely however should the body be damaged in such a way that it starts to bleed and lose it's liquid then F.F will have to find a water source to replenish themselves.
      • Plankton Gun: F.F can fire parts of theirself as if they were a gun and it is this method F.F most commonly uses to infiltrate the bodies of it's enemies. The shots are powerful enough to break through skin but are not inherently lethal by themselves.
      • Superhuman Strength: While weak individually, when combining the strength of all the plankton, F.F can muster up enough power to pull open an automatic door and go toe to toe with Stone Free in a physical fight.
      • Water Control: F.F has limited control over water, being able to create a square mirror of water.
      • Healing: F.F is able to heal their allies by sealing their wounds up with Plankton. F.F is also able to regenerate from any damage sustained to it, as long as their is at least one member of the colony still alive.

  • Experience
  • F.F has been "alive" as it were for a unspecified amount of time prior to the events of Stone Ocean, acting as a mindless guard dog for Pucci. Over the course of Stone Ocean they are involved in a number of fights against a number of Stand users with a variety of unique abilities so they are very well versed in combat despite only being an active fighter for a few months at best.

    • Combat Ability

    F.F is a very capable and skilled fighter, able to go toe to toe with skilled and experienced Stand users such as Jolyne and Kenzou. Their unique physiology means they are highly physically capable as well, showing great feats of strength and agility although this is lessened when inhabiting a person's body.

    • Stealth

    In terms of traditional stealth, F.F is pretty skilled at staying unnoticed and sneaking up on people such as when they almost gets the drop on Kenzou by hiding amongst the bodies of dead prisoners. This is even more apparent when they are not inhabiting a body as the Plankton that make up F.F are hard to notice in small numbers. In terms of social stealth, F.F is fairly unassuming while possessing Atroe at first glance, however their odd behaviour may make them stand out.

    • Composure

    For the most part F.F is fairly collected in combat however their are a couple of things that can set them off. Trying to take away water from them, or even being in the presence of water they consider "theirs" will cause they to act violently. Insulting their intelligence or implying that they are lesser because they are non human is also liable to enrage them.

    • Brutality
    As they are not human, F.F lacks the morality you'd expect from a normal person and as such is willing to kill and mutilate their opponents without hesitation in order to win a fight.

    Scenario, Voting and Other Information[]

    Nothing fancy this time just your standard last person to be eliminated wins. Combatants can be eliminated via one of the following ways;

    1) Be Killed

    2) Be incapacitated for 60 seconds. Incapacitation can be either being knocked unconscious or being put in a state where they cannot continue to fight. Being zombified by Baron Samedi's poison spit counts as being incapacitated. In the case of Foo Fighters, being without a host body for more than 60 seconds counts as being incapacitated.

    The winner is the last warrior left standing.

    Battle takes place in a small city. The city is inhabited by normal humans with normal human physiology as well as several non-human anthropomorphic animals. The humans will not be freaked out or bothered by any of the non-human combatants walking about.

    In order for your vote to be counted you must rank each warrior from 1st to 11th based on where you think they will finish . Each rank will be assigned a number with 1st=11 points, 2nd=10 points, 3rd=9 Points etc. In the case of a tie each of the tied warriors will receive the maximum points of the position they tied in e.g a tie for 2nd place means all warriors tied for that position get 10 points. The warrior with the most points wins simple as.

    Constructing scenarios will result in a vote being discounted. Some examples of scenario constructing include;

    • Placing a warrior in a position based on a specific set of circumstances happening. For example saying "Warrior A finishes in first because they kill Warrior B and then incapacitate warrior C" is considered constructing a scenario because it relies upon a predetermined outcome that may not happen in the actual fight.
    • Placing a warrior in a certain position based on a specific team up with another warrior. For example saying "Warrior A and B team up and kill everyone else before fighting" is considered constructing a scenario because it relies on two warriors teaming up even though there is not a guarantee they will, Saying "Warrior A wins because they can make alliances well" is not considered constructing a scenario because it is not determining a warriors victory based on a specific pairing.

  • Captain Grime: Between episodes "The Three Armies" and "The Beginning of the End".
  • Earthworm Jim: During the events of Season 1 of the "Earthworm Jim Cartoon".
  • Madame Mist: Between "Kingdom of the Wicked" and "Last Stand of Dead Men"
  • Kassandra: Between the events of "Assassins Creed: Odyssey Main Story" and the First DLC "Legacy of the First Blade."
  • Kraab: Between the episodes "The Final Battle: Part 1" and "Cough It Up."
  • Baron Samedi: Prior to the events of the episode "The Walking Dead."
  • The Pain: Prior to the events of "Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater."
  • Tai Lung: During the events of "Kung Fu Panda."
  • Doctor Octopus: During the Events of "Spider-Man 2."
  • Lizard Priest: After the events of the film "Goblin Slayer: Goblin's Crown."
  • Foo Fighters: Between the Arcs "Yo-Yo Ma is Coming" and "F.F. - The Witness"

  • Battle[]

    Chapter 1: Welcome To The Jungle[]

    The city of Animatropolis is not your average city although you wouldn’t be able to tell just by looking at it. As far as cities go it looks pretty normal with its intricate winding streets and roads, skyscrapers poking up towards the heavens and a hustling bustle of inhabitants going about their daily lives. That however is where the strange nature of Animatropolis reveals itself as it is populated not just by normal humans but anthropomorphic animals as well. These two groups live in relative harmony where seeing a wolfman walking down the street is no stranger than seeing a regular human.

    Even in a city like this however some visitors do still stand out Kassandra thinks as she takes in the area around her. She’d received a message from a mysterious client, promising her a handsome reward to come to this city and eliminate ten targets. Her client was not forthcoming on the identities of these targets however giving them code names such as Mammal, Fish and Amphibian. Having dealt with the Cult of Cosmos many centuries ago she is used to odd code names such as this but she can’t help but wish better information had been provided. With that being said though she is fairly certain she has identified the target known only as ‘Crustacean’.

    Plodding its way through the streets is a robotic crab being, dwarfing the people and animals alike and drawing stares all around. Kassandra slips through the crowd in its wake, biding her time for a good moment to strike. As the crowds of people begin to thin out her targets stops, scanning its head over the crowds as if it is looking for someone. Sensing a chance, Kassandra increases her pace until she is right behind the robot. Bending her knees, she launches herself up to the top of his body, swinging the Spear of Leonidas. Suddenly the head snaps around in a complete 180 and the rest of his body quickly follows, the large metal claw swinging right at Kassandra. She manages to turn herself in the air so the bulk of it misses her, with only the very tip clipping her legs. Still, this is enough to throw her balance off and she lands on her side, quickly rolling up into a crouch.

    “You didn’t really think I hadn’t noticed you right?” Kraab says mockingly. Kassandra doesn’t respond as the people around begin to scatter, not wanting any part in the fight to come. She instead takes up her dory, twirling it around her and circling the cyborg. Kraab responds by raising his claw at her, opening the pinchers, and firing off a stream of lasers. Kassandra dodges around the lasers and rushes in close, thrusting the dory up at his chest. However, the spear head merely glances off the body without doing any damage. The claw comes down to try and snap it but Kassandra has already moved it away and this time she tries to go for sweeping motion on Kraab’s legs but again the spear merely bounces off with no effect.

    Tossing it aside she takes her bow from her shoulder, notching up three arrows at once. While she does so she also activates flame mode, coating the heads of the arrows in a blazing fire. Kraab sees what she is doing and rushes her down as she releases the arrows. He raises his claw and blocks two of them with the third smacking off his chest, leaving a small scorch from the flames but nothing more. Kassandra tries to jump out of the way but Kraab slams his claw into her from above, smacking her into the ground. She groans in pain as Kraab looms over her. “Your puny earth technology is no match for me” he says, drawing the sword from across his back to finish her off.

    Before he can however he is suddenly sent staggering away as something large and green smashes into him. Kassandra raises her eyebrow at the large lizard man standing where Kraab once was, sword drawn “You look like you could use some aid adventurer” Lizard Priest says to Kassandra with a smile.

    “If you’re offering,” she replies, waving away his attempts to help her up as Kraab steadies himself from the blow. His head swivels as he takes in the new challenger as well as the old one.

    “Getting help I see. Fine with me, you’ll need it to have any chance,” he says, readying himself as the pair rush towards him.


    Meanwhile across town Earthworm Jim finds himself drawn to the sound of screaming from around the nearby corner. A woman runs from around it, swatting around her head with her hands. Jim stops her as she tries to run past. “Good Citizen! What is the cause for all this screaming?”

    “There’s a crazy man back there,” the woman says, shaking in his grasp. “He’s yelling about pain and suffering and he’s got a fuck ton of bees or wasps or something following him around.”

    “Don’t worry my good lady, I will deal with this lunatic!” Jim sprints round the corner to find the scene exactly as the woman described. The man in question is huge in size and swarming all around him are hundreds and thousands of bees, stinging indiscriminately at any person unfortunate enough to be caught nearby. “You there!” Jim shouts. The man turns to look at him, his face covered completely by a balaclava.

    “What do we have here? A worm? In a suit?” the Pain says. He cackles evilly. “Well, whatever you are, prepare to face a world of PAIN like you’ve never imagined.” As he finishes his sentence, he does a flip before grabbing a vial jacket. He throws it at Jim, who quickly draws his plasma blaster and shoots it. The glass shatters but the liquid comes tumbling out and splashes all over his suit and head.

    “Egads!” Jim exclaims. He sniffs and recoils back in horror. “What disgusting concoction have you assaulted my nostrils with you fiend!” The Pain doesn’t answer he merely cackles once more as a column of hornets breaks off from the main group and makes a beeline towards Jim. He fires at them with his blaster, shredding through their numbers until most of them have been vaporized by the heat. He charges forward at the Pain who watches him come closer with interest. Just as he is about to get close enough to punch him, a huge cloud of hornets suddenly emerges from the Pain's suit and surrounds Jim, carrying him away. Jim flails about trying to free himself as well as swatting away any of the hornets that get close to his head.

    “GRENADE” the Pain shouts maniacally as a small group of hornets slowly begin to carry a grenade towards the main swarm. Distracted by trying to stop himself being stung and with the deafening buzzing all around him, he doesn’t hear or notice the grenade until it is right in front of him and it detonates, sending him flying through the air and smashing through the window of a nearby café. Jim extracts himself from a pile of tables and chairs, his head spinning from where he whacked it off the side of the counter. The patrons of the café are all fleeing out of the back entrance but as he stumbles forward back towards the Pain, he notices one of them instead jump through the broken window.

    Jim follows after her and to his surprise sees her running straight at the Pain. A group of hornets buzzes around her, jabbing their stingers into her body but they have seemingly no effect on her. “Not bothered by hornet stings, are we?” The Pain says. “Well let’s see how you deal with this! TOMMY GUN.” A machine gun suddenly appears out of the swarm of hornets and the Pain grasps it tightly, firing off a barrage of bullets into the mysterious woman. They pierce into her body, making her stumble back and when the clip is emptied, she is left barely standing and covered in bullet holes.

    “Silly girl, you could’ve avoided all this PAIN, if only you’d stayed away” The Pain says. He starts to laugh but he cuts it short when he sees the holes on the woman’s body slowly beginning to close over. She lifts up her hand to point at him, almost as if she is holding a gun and something small, green, and fast suddenly shoots forward. Before the Pain can do anything else the projectile hits him on the jaw. He grabs at it expecting to feel some sort of effect but oddly there is nothing and he looks back at the woman who seems to have healed completely from her wounds. “Whatever you did it didn’t work!” he shouts. “It didn’t even cause me any PAI-”. Before he can finish his sentence, his chest explodes open and he looks down at it in shock as spilling out amongst the blood and the guts are tiny plankton. He slumps slowly to the ground as the hornets around him disperse off into the sky.

    Jim rushes over to the mystery woman, who is crouched over the body of the Pain. “How did you manage to survive that!” he says amazed. Before the woman can answer a faint beeping noise catches their attention. Jim quickly identifies it as coming from the Pain and he peers over before a look of horror crosses his face. “Jumping Jalapenos! That’s a bomb! Look out!” He grabs the woman and pulls her away from the body, shielding her with his suit as the blast from the explosion rocks them. “Are you okay?” Jim asks once he is sure it is safe.

    “I’m fine I think” The woman says before looking up at him, a glimmer of interest appearing in her eyes. “But that isn’t important. I’m more curious about you. Am I right in saying you’re an earthworm?”

    “That’s right! I was just a normal worm, worrying about not getting devoured by birds. Then one day this suit fell down from space and I crawled inside it and well that made me into the worm I am today! The name’s Jim,” he replies extending out his hand to shake. The woman looks at the hand curiously.

    “My name is Foo Fighters but everyone calls me F.F. We’re not so different me and you. I was also given new life from above although not in the same way. I used to just be a normal colony of plankton.”

    “That’s fantastic! So, you know what it’s like to escape from the bottom of the food chain!” Jim says jollily.

    “I sure do,” F.F says smiling.

    “Say, I’ve been sent to deal with some really ungroovy baddies in this city. I could do with a friend like you to help me out. What do you say?” F.F brow furrows at this, realizing that Jim must be one of the people they have been sent to eliminate. But at the same time how could they hurt another who has been given the gift of intelligence as they have? F.F banishes the thoughts of betrayal from their mind for now and smiles.

    “I can help you sure.” Jim grins at this and reaches into his suit and takes out his Pocket Rocket.

    “In that case, let’s make like some eggs and scramble!” he says, sitting on the rocket and patting on the seat behind him. F.F tentatively jumps on the back, letting out a whoop of excitement as it whooshes off into the sky.


    Humming as he strolls down the street, Baron Samedi carefully observes the citizens to see if he can figure out who exactly he is here to eliminate. Nobody he has encountered so far seems like they are much of a threat and he has been here since the early morning. His path takes him down towards a block of residential flats and he notes the high number of them. Deciding that this is as good a place as any to start he walks towards the first one on the ground floor, rapping on the door gently. After a few seconds a man appears at the door. “Can I help you?” he asks.

    “Bonjour mon ami,” Samedi says tipping his hat. “Is there a Mr Smith who lives here?”

    “No. It’s just me who lives here.”

    “Not ideal but it will have to do,” Samedi says as he woges. He spits a glob of venom into the man’s face and he stumbles back, grabbing at his face and crying out in pain. Samedi strides past him and closes the door behind him, his first minion claimed.


    When he’d been told there were ten great warriors waiting to face him in battle, Tai Lung had relished the challenge, finally a chance to prove he really was the Dragon Warrior. But after hours of walking about in Animatropolis his good mood has faded, replaced with a growing annoyance. Wherever these great warriors were supposed to be they aren’t showing themselves. As he walks he sees a frog man walking down the street, lugging behind him a large Warhammer and his interest is piqued. A newt man is walking past him in the opposite direction and the frog grabs him by the arm as he passes.

    “Ah ha. Surely you must be who I’m here to fight. A great warrior of the Newtopian Army!” the frog says.

    “Get the hell off me freak,” the newt says gruffly, shaking him off and carrying on walking. The frog sags dejectedly as Tai Lung approaches him.

    “You there Frog!” he calls.

    “You better not be talking to me,” the frog says stiffening. “I am no frog.”

    “Well, whatever you are. Am I right in thinking you have been sent here for the same purpose I have?” The frog’s expression changes from annoyance to excitement.

    “Are you saying that you’ve been sent here for glorious combat just like me? At long last, I was beginning to think I been sent on a wild goose chase. My name is Captain Grime of the Toad Army.”

    “I am Tai Lung, the Dragon Warrior.”

    “A dragon warrior, eh? That sounds like a worthy opponent.” Grime says hefting Barrel’s Warhammer up into his hands. The rocket booster activates, bathing the head of the hammer in a purple hue as he lunges forward. Tai Lung easily steps back out of the way of the attack and it smashes into the ground, leaving behind a large indentation in the ground, the purple shockwaves emanating out before dissipating. Grime presses forward, swinging the mighty weapon as if it were as light as a feather but Tai Lung is more than quick enough to avoid the wide arching swings. He doesn’t attack himself initially and instead studies Grime while he avoids his attacks, noting the armour that covers his vitals.

    When he gets a feel for Grime’s style, he launches his counterattack. As another wild swing misses him, he sweeps Grime’s feet from underneath him which drops him to the ground. Another kick sends the Warhammer sliding away across the floor and as Grime jumps to his feet he slams both his fists into his chest. The power of the blow smashes the breast plate into pieces and sends Grime hurtling through the air. He uses his tongue to latch onto an overhanging drain pipe and flips himself around to land on his feet. Realizing he’s getting nowhere with the Warhammer he elects not to retrieve it and he and Tai Lung rush towards each other again. They trade blows but it is quickly apparent who is the more skilled of the two as Tai Lung blocks or dodges everything Grime can throw at him while getting the better punches in. As the snow leopard goes in with a knee to the chest, Grime uses both his hands to block it before extending his tongue out to deal a hefty whack to Tai Lung’s head, his first successful blow of the encounter.

    Tai Lung stumbles back, wiping at the slimy mucous from the tongue, fending off the blows from Grime as he presses this advantage. Once he has recovered, he catches a pair of punches and flings them away and with a roar he delivers a high kick to the head of the toad. He then ducks down low to deliver a punch to chest and Grime exhales loudly as all the air is forced from his lungs before Tai Lung follows through with an elbow to the jaw. He finishes off the move with an earthshattering jumping kick which sends Grime reeling away. He steadies himself against a nearby wall as Tai Lung takes a moment to catch his breath. Deciding he has had enough of this fight the next time he attacks, he bats away Grime' punch and jabs his finger into the right coronary artery and Grime seizes up. “You fought well but not well enough,” Tai Lung says, as Grime collapses to the ground completely paralysed. Invigorated by the fight he walks with a spring in his step as he searches for his next opponent.

    A few minutes later a man wearing dark sunglasses and dressed in a large trench coat, surveying the scene. He stands over the prone Grime and a long metal tentacle slides out from under the coat and grabs him by the leg, lifting him up into the air. Otto Octavius inspects the amphibian with interest. “He’s taken quite a beating but he’s still alive,” he says softly. “Whoever did this to him is clearly very powerful if they’ve paralysed him this bad. I should probably avoid whoever this is, let them wear themselves down on some of the others.” Another tentacle slides out and sidles up to his ear, the pinchers fluttering as if it is talking to him. “Hmm, you make a good point,” Otto says quietly “The quicker we defeat whoever did this the quicker we can get the tritium we need. We shouldn’t wait.”

    Satisfied the tentacle moves away from him and the remaining two also appear, lifting Otto into the air. They carry him up the side of the nearest building so he can look for where this mysterious attacker could’ve gone to. Preoccupied with his search, neither he nor his tentacles notice a small black spider crawl up his jacket and slide into the pocket as a veiled woman observes him from inside a darkened alleyway.

    Chapter 2: Attack Of The Dead Men[]

    The nozzle inside Kraab’s claw opens up and a purple gas flows out of, enveloping him, Lizard Priest, and Kassandra in a cloud. Lizard Priest is unaffected by the vapours but Kassandra is left coughing and spluttering from the effects of it. Kraab uses this to his advantage and smashes her with his claw, sending her sliding across the ground roughly and into a nearby market stall, her sword flying off somewhere overhead. She extracts herself from it and takes a moment to have a breather while Lizard Priest grapples with Kraab.

    “I thought he was being cocky when he said we’d need the two of us to beat him but he wasn’t wrong,” she thinks before she considers what her next move should be. None of her regular weapons seem to be having much effect on the cyborg but she is pretty sure the Spear of Leonidas would do the trick. The problem is getting in close enough to get a clean strike. Shadow of Nix would help with that but she is reluctant to use such an adrenaline draining ability especially with the worry that all the commotion from the fight might attract the attention of her other targets.

    As she is thinking this, she notices people starting to appear from the various streets and doorways around the square their fight is taking place in. She initially thinks nothing of it, assuming they have come to see what all the fuss is about. But something seems off about them and she uses Ikaros to get a closer look. Their eyes are wild, with a red ring around their eyeballs and a spattering of green gunk around their mouth and chin. Feeling a sense of dread, she looks around and sees that the group of people have blocked all the routes of escape. She looks over at Kraab and Lizard Priest, who are so preoccupied with their fight they haven’t noticed the rapidly growing horde. Then as if a switch has been flicked the people start rushing towards the trio, growling angrily and Kassandra draws her bow.

    “Hey! We’ve got a problem here,” she shouts and Lizard Priest looks over to her, seeing for the first time the zombies rushing at them. Kraab also notices, his head swivelling around in a 360 degree angle to survey the new threat. The three look at each other, silently acknowledging a truce for the time being. Kassandra fires off an arrow at the closest zombie, sending it piercing through their throat and dropping them to the ground. Kraab fires off lasers, knocking the zombies to the ground, but they are quickly back on their feet, seemingly even angrier than before. Lizard Priest scatters a few fangs on the floor, bowing his head in a silent prayer to summon a Dragontooth Warrior, handing him a spare blade from his robes. Once the zombies get close Kassandra and Kraab switch to their close quarters weaponry as more and more of the undead begin to funnel into the square.

    Kassandra slams the Spear of Leonidas into an approaching zombie’s chest, ripping it out again to stab into the neck of another as it snarls at her side. Lizard Priest is beside her, hacking at the zombies with his sword while nearby the Dragontooth Warrior is doing the same. Suddenly Kassandra gets a signal from Ikaros of something unusual and via his birds eye view of the area she sees a man stood at the fringes of the horde of zombies. He shows no sign of being infected but the undead ignore him and Kassandra realizes this man might be the person responsible for the zombies.

    Dispatching another zombie she shouts for Lizard Priest, who looks to her and she gestures wildly at the man. “I’m going to go after the man in the top hat, I think he’s the one controlling the zombies” she yells and Lizard Priest gives her a quick nod, before raking his claws across a zombies face and sending them sprawling. Kassandra fights her way through the crowd, focusing on weaving between the zombies and only killing them when she has to. Once she has moved far enough away from her ally, she activates Ring of Chaos and all the undead around her knocked away and stunned. This leaves her a clear path to her target and as she runs towards him, the man tips his hat at her and smiles before darting off as Kassandra chases after him.


    Meanwhile Tai Lung is also in the midst of his own fight against the undead, sending one of them flying through a nearby doorway with a powerful kick. As another approaches he drops them with a sweeping leg kick before stamping hard on their head to knock them unconscious. Another jumps onto him from above, grabbing him in a bear hug. He spins around rapidly, dislodging them enough to fire off a series of vicious elbows into the zombie, breaking several bones and leaving them in a crumpled heap on the floor. More have appeared in the meantime and Tai Lung finds himself backed up into a corner as he fends them off. As his desperation grows his attacks become increasingly brutal, one punch so vicious it rips the head of one of the zombies 180 degrees with a sickening crack as the neck vertebrae snaps.

    He hears a growl from behind him and turns to face the threat only for the zombie to be hoisted away. It continues to snarl and flail about in the grip of a long metal tentacle before being thrown into the ground with such force Tai Lung can hear the bones shattering. The owner of the tentacle is a dark haired man with sunglasses on and three more tentacles are at work smashing aside other zombies until between the two of them they have finished off the horde. Tai Lung looks at the man with interest but before he can say anything a tentacle strikes at him and he jumps away out of it’s range.

    “I had a feeling you were one of the warriors I was sent here to defeat,” Tai Lung says. “I admire your honour; you could’ve just let that rabble overwhelm me.”

    “I just didn’t want them getting in my way,” Otto snaps, before the tentacles launch forward at the snow leopard. Tai Lung jumps over the grabbing hand of the first one, running along the arm of the tentacle towards Otto’s body. He knocks another one away with his arm before jumping forward with a flying kick. Inches before he connects one of the arms leaps up to block it, closing around his foot and hurling him away. He twists gracefully in the air, landing on his feet and swerving his body out of the way of another strike from a tentacle. Another one dives in at him and he moves to dodge it however this was a ruse and another sneaks around the other side, grabbing his ankle in a vice like grip.

    Tai Lung finds himself suddenly suspended upside down as another of the tentacles grabs his other ankle. A third grabs his left arm and he suddenly finds himself almost completely immobilized. Otto smirks at him. “You’re quick but you’re no Spider-Man” he says smugly and the final tentacle lungs in, a blade protruding from the centre. However in his arrogance he sends it too close to Tai Lung’s free arm and the snow leopard takes full advantage. He swings down a punch, striking the tentacle at the joint between the hand and the arm. There is a spark of electricity and the other tentacles recoil back as if in pain, releasing their grip on Tai Lung who drops to the ground. The hand on the damage tentacle dangles uselessly and Otto looks at it in disbelief. “How dare you do that to my creation,” he shouts and with a roar of anger the undamaged tentacles barrel towards Tai Lung in a frenzy.

    He settles into a defence stance, batting away the first two tentacles before grabbing the other, under the hand so it cannot grab him. He heaves it with all his strength, catching Otto off guard and dragging him towards him. The other two tentacles dig into the ground, anchoring him in place but this is exactly what Tai Lung was expecting and he releases the tentacle he is holding onto, giving it a kick as he does to ensure it can’t pursue after him. Otto tries to extract the other two tentacles from the ground but he is too slow as Tai Lung strikes him with a double handed punch to the chest and he is sent crashing into a nearby building, smashing through the brick wall and landing in the rubble. Tai Lung saunters up to where he lays groaning, ready to put him out of commission for good.


    Baron Samedi scans the area around him as he runs. He has been careful not to let his pursuer get too close but also made sure he hasn’t got so far ahead that she gives up entirely. She is fit and healthy though and Samedi can already feel his legs beginning to ache. All around him he can hear the sounds of violence and chaos as his children wreak their havoc and it brings a smile to his face. He comes across a group of them viciously kicking a lion lady on the floor, hopefully this is the target with the code name “Mammal” he thinks. He also spots a dilapidated house nearby and decides this the place for him to lay his trap.

    He whistles to get the attention of the group of zombies and they crowd around him. He points to Kassandra, chuckling as he sees the annoyance on her face when they barrel towards her. He keeps back two however and leads them to the house. He orders them to break down the door and as he enters, he glances back over his shoulder to make sure Kassandra sees where he has gone. He looks around the bottom floor of the house and finds a door that leads down into a basement which is dark and damp, the perfect place for an ambush. He leaves his two minions up in the house as he settles down to wait.

    As he does, he feels a slight sting on his neck and as he puts his hand up to touch it. Suddenly a sharp pain shoot through his body like lightning. He drops to his knees, feeling his throat begin to constrict and the muscles in his body begin to seize up. He woges repeatedly in a panic as his wesen and human side fight against whatever is ravaging his body. For the first and only time in his life he feels the despair and fear his own victims do, before the venom takes full effect.


    “Get away from me you foul creature” Jim cries out as a zombie tackles him to the ground. He pushes it away but two more take it’s place and begin pummelling his suit. Jim pulls his head down inside it to protect it, hoping none of the creatures think to stick their hands in and pull him out. After a few moments the rhythmic sound of kicking stops and he peeks out his head. The two zombies are grappling with the zombie who initially tackled him and Jim is confused until he sees plankton seeping out of the eyes of the lone undead. He shoots the two zombies with his blaster until they go down and the one Foo Fighters has possessed is quick to follow as the plankton destroys their brain from the inside.

    “We should try and avoid any more of these if we can,” F.F says. From the next street over they can hear the sound of fighting and they begin to walk off in the opposite sound of the commotion.

    “But that could be an innocent citizen over there being attacked by those brain hungry freaks! We have to protect them!” Without another word Jim rushes over to the noise and F.F watches him as he comes up to a large brick wall. Suddenly the wall explodes, sending bricks flying and a cloud of dust spewing up so Jim has to cover his eyes. When it has cleared slightly, he sees a man lying groaning amongst the rubble. Strolling casually towards the man from the other side of the wall is an anthropomorphic leopard and it doesn’t take long for Jim to put two and two together.

    “Hey you furball! Who do you think you are attacking this innocent man?!”

    “Innocent?” Tai Lung says, arching his eyebrow.

    “Don’t try to play coy with me! Don’t take another step or else there is going to be big trouble!”

    “Is that so?” Tai Lung says. “You think you can threaten the me? You’re just a stupid worm. What are you going to do spit dirt on me?”

    “Hey! Don’t speak to him like that,” Foo Fighters says with a snarl, plankton surging up their arm to form a gun.

    “My, my everyone wants a go at me don’t they,” Tai Lung says as he looks down at Octavius who is still writhing about in pain. Deciding he is not a threat at the moment he leaps forward at Jim and sending him staggering away with a kick to the head. F.F fires a cluster of plankton and Tai Lung swipes them away with his hand as he rushes at the stand user. They raise their arms to block his initial strike before aiming a kick at his chest. It connects but doesn’t have enough power behind it to affect him and he returns with a kick of his own which makes them stumble back. He then attempts to strike their head but F.F contorts Atroe’s neck manoeuvre it safely away. They then spring forward at him and he bats away their punch before kicking at their leg, which buckles under the strike before Tai Lung sends them sprawling with a blow to the ribs.

    Jim grabs Tai Lung around the waits, hoisting him over his head and slamming him into the floor with a suplex. He rolls to his feet and drives a punch into the suit which pushes him back but as he follows in Jim grabs hold of his head and flings it forward like a whip, slapping Tai Lung in the nose. Dazed, he is then launched backwards by a punch from Jim and F.F sprints towards him. Tai Lung lands on all fours, his claws scraping with an awful squealing sound against the pavement as he slows himself before he charges towards her. He jumps into the air and they mimic him, with both of them aiming a punch for each other in mid-air. They both connect, both in the chest and they both go down with a painful sounding bang.

    Tai Lung is the first to his feet but before he can hit F.F again he is driven back by Jim, who is firing his blaster at him. The plasma shots singe his fur and he roars in anger, the damage to his pride stinging more than the damage to his body. It’s at that moment a stray zombie wanders into the street and it’s gaze locks onto Tai Lung. It runs towards him in a rage and Tai Lung drops it neatly with a savage kick before grabbing it by the shirt. He throws it with all his might at Jim and it crashes into him, sending them both to the floor in a heap. F.F runs in and Tai Lung ducks in low past their defences, aiming for the heart as he did with Grime earlier. He hits the correct spot and but F.F. doesn’t seem to be effected and they slam a headbutt into him which staggers him back.

    As he stumbles away Jim detaches and fires off one of the hands from his suit and it blasts through the air and latches onto Tai Lung’s neck. It begins to choke him and he claws at the hand in desperation but he cannot get good purchase on it. F.F uses this distraction to fire off several plankton bullets at him and they bury into his body. Tai Lung roars in agony as they begin to attack him from the inside and combined with the powerful choking grip of the super suit, he is soon laying unconscious on the floor.

    F.F uses the plankton to expunge the water from Tai Lung’s body in a spray which she gratefully slurps up, replenishing her injuries. “Hey F.F. I hate to interrupt your water break but could I get a little help here?” Jim says and she glances over to see the zombie from before, having recovered from the earlier collision is trying desperately to bite Jim who is holding it off with the other nondetached hand. A flurry of plankton shots later and the zombies is lying prone on the floor, the water from it’s body adding to that of Tai Lung’s as F.F practically showers in the liquid.

    While she is doing this Jim walks over to the man in the rubble, who is just starting to get to his feet. “Are you alright mister?” Jim says, slotting the detached hand back in place as it returns to him.

    “I think so,” the man says, holding his head.

    “What’s your name?”

    “Otto Octavius”

    “I’m Jim. Why was that psycho-kitty attacking you anyway?”

    “He was trying to rob me I think,” Otto says as a metal tentacle slides out from his jacket. Jim looks at it in awe.

    “Woah. That’s a pretty groovy looking robotic arm you got there.”

    “Huh. Oh yeah. It’s an invention of mine.” The tentacle slide up to his ear and the man stares off into space as if contemplating something.

    “Well I think it would be better if you stuck with us. There’s some crazy stuff going down in this place but me and my friend F.F are trying to help out,” Jim says, flicking his thumb towards Foo Fighters who has gotten enough water and walks over to them. As they approach, they look at Otto with suspicion. “I was just saying to Mr Octavius here that he should stay with us for a bit, at least until we’ve stopped the lunatic who unleashed all these brain munching zombies.”

    “I don’t know Jim, I don’t think we can trust him,” they say. Otto is still staring into the distance while the tentacle appears to become more animated.

    “No, I don’t think that’s a good idea,” he says quietly.

    “Why not?” Jim asks. Otto shakes his head suddenly as if snapping out of a trance, the tentacle slumping over almost like it is upset about something. He looks at the pair.

    “Sorry, I was miles away. No, I think you’re right we should all work together” he says but there is a slight hesitancy in his voice.

    “That’s great news!” Jim says. The sound of screaming and growling filters down from further in the city and Jim turns his head towards it, running off towards it. F.F takes another look at the new ally, getting an odd feeling from him but follows Jim with Otto ambling after them.

    Chapter 3: The Itsy Bitsy Spider[]

    Kassandra inspects the body of Baron Samedi carefully. The man is clearly dead but she can’t see a scratch on him anywhere. “It’s almost as if he died of a heart attack,” she murmurs to herself. She lifts up his head and notices two small pricks on his neck as if he’s been bitten by something. Confused she straightens up, whatever has happened to him he certainly won’t be creating anymore zombies. As she goes back up the stairs a small white spider scuttles up the handrail next to her and she pulls her arm away instinctually. It stops, almost as if is about to leap at her but instead carries on up the wall and disappears from sight. Leaving the house with a sense of unease, she retraces her steps back to square where she finds the zombie horde has been whittled down to almost nothing.

    Lizard Priest has his hands on his knees, clearly catching his breath from the fight, while Kraab is still engaged with a couple of the zombies, his back to them. As Kassandra approaches, she looks at Lizard Priest, then at Kraab and he nods his head, understanding straight away what she is suggesting. Kraab stomps his pincher legs down on the last remaining zombie, impaling it through the chest. “Now that we’ve dealt with this little distraction,” he says starting to turn towards the pair, “It’s time for us to finish what we started.”

    The Dragon Tooth Warrior leaps forward at Kraab but he is much too quick to react and he smashes the summon into pieces with a powerful sweep of his claw. Lizard Priest meanwhile is knelt as if in prayer and as Kraab starts to run at him, Kassandra draws the Spear of Leonidas to intercept. However Kraab suddenly stops in his tracks, as if he is being prevented from moving by an invisible wall. Kassandra is confused at first but then she notices a thick orangey brown rust spreading up from the cyborgs legs and up his torso towards his head. He topples over, his head spinning around in a panic, as the rust begins to disable his cybernetic enhancements. Lizard Priest, having finished his prayer, strides over to him and with a powerful sweep of his tail, smashes Kraab’s head clean off and sends it clattering away.

    “Something tells me you aren’t an agent of the Demon Lord,” Lizard Priest says.

    “And I’m guessing you’re not in the Order of the Ancients,” Kassandra replies. “Which I’m glad for, I’d hate to have to kill you after all your help.”

    “Me too,” Lizard Priest says. “I’m used to travelling with a party, this solo adventuring isn’t really my style. I don’t know of this Order of the Ancients but they don’t sound all too friendly.”

    “They aren’t. Likewise with this Demon Lord you mention,” Kassandra says.

    “I think we could both use help in stopping these tyrants. So if it’s okay with you I’d like to continue our partnership”

    “I think that is a very good idea,” Kassandra says.

    “That man you pursued earlier. Was he the one responsible for the zombies?”

    “I believe so yes. He’s dead, although not by hand. We should probably leave this place. We don’t want to be here, surrounded by dead bodies, when the police show up. I’ll explain more as we walk,” Kassandra says. The pair leave the square, as the sounds of sirens pierce the air.


    Otto inspects the damaged tentacle arm, grimacing at the extent of the damage. It won’t be a simple fix and he knows he doesn’t have time to stop and try and find the tools necessary to repair it. He tries to put it out of his thoughts but he cannot and a spike of anger shoots through him whenever he does. Ahead of him, Jim, and F.F are in deep conversation about what their next move should be.

    “I understand what you’re saying F.F but surely, we should focus on helping out the normal people. There are still zombies walking about looking for brains to munch on!” Jim says.

    “The emergency services can deal with that,” F.F replies. “Our focus should be on stopping whoever is responsible for this. Or on stopping some of these other bad guys you mentioned.” Otto’s attention is peaked by this remark as one of his tentacles sidles up to his ear.

    “No. How could they know I’m one of the people they need to defeat,” he says quietly. “They could prove useful still.”

    “Did you say something?” F.F says, they and Jim looking back to him as they walk.

    “Nothing, I was just talking to myself,” Otto says quickly.

    “They say that’s the first sign of insanity!” Jim says with a laugh. F.F smiles but there is no warmth to it and paranoia wells up inside Otto. The earthworm won’t be a problem, he seems to take everything at face value. But this woman. She’s much to suspicious of him. “You make a good point though F.F,” Jim says steering the conversation back to their original discussion. As he talks another one of the tentacles sidles up to his other ear and Otto furrows his brow in frustration.

    “You’re right of course. I’ve wasted too much time,” he mummers. A tentacle bursts forward, smashing through F.F’s torso and punching out the other side in a gaping hole. They gasp in shock and Otto hurls them away before the other two make a bee line for Jim. One grabs him around the torso and the other grabs his head and with a flick yanks him out of the Super-Suit. The Super Suit is flung into the distance, where it smashes into a nearby building, breaking a waterpipe and sending water exploding out from the pressure.

    “Without that suit you aren’t so tough,” Otto says, flashing an evil grin at Jim who wriggles about helplessly in the grasp of the tentacle. Another of his tentacles unsheathes the blade stored within it’s hand but suddenly swings to the side, blocking a flurry of projectiles. Otto glances over to see F.F getting to their feet, the hole in their chest slowly beginning to heal over. His tentacle retracts back and he looks curiously at the green gunk which is slathered across it and appears to be moving. Inspecting it closer he can see tiny little creatures moving about inside the gunk and he recognizes them as plankton.

    “How curious,” he says. “Do you control the plankton? No you must be the plankton correct?”

    “I’m not just plankton,” F.F says. “I am more than that. I have emotions and dreams and intelligence just like a human does.”

    “Intelligence truly is a priceless gift,” Otto says, a surprising softness in his expression. It’s doesn't last long though and the tentacles lash out towards F.F with surprising speed. They dodge around them before firing off another cluster of Plankton which are once again intercepted by the tentacles and flung aside. One of the tentacles latches onto F. F’s arm but rather than holding them in place it instead pulls powerfully and the arm comes off in a spray of blood and plankton. The other arm tears off a leg and F.F. collapses to the ground as more precious liquid begins to pour out, preventing them from healing the massive damage that has been done to Atroe’s body. As the tentacles loom above them, Otto feels a tickling sensation slowly rising up his leg. He looks down in shock to see hundreds of black spiders clambering up his body.

    He immediately retracts his tentacles, dropping Jim onto the ground, and they begin snapping at the spiders, crushing many of them, but they are quickly replaced by more and more of the arachnids. They begin to get under his clothing and he can feel them biting his skin and he yells out in a mix of anger and fear. Otto is so preoccupied with the spiders that he doesn’t notice the plankton bullet flying towards him until it is too late. The plankton bury into his body, expunging as much fluid as they can from inside him and shooting it towards Atroe’s body where the rest of the colony can put it to use healing the wounds.

    As Otto slumps over, his body slowly shutting down from a combination of dehydration and the effects of the spider venom, he gazes over to the side where he can see a woman peeking out from inside one of the darkened doorways of a nearby building, her face concealed by a veil. Oddly this reminds him of his wedding day and he smiles as he remembers how beautiful Rosie looked that day. The thought that he will soon be joining her takes away the last of his fight as his tentacles slump down next to him.

    “Are you okay F.F?” Jim says as he crawls towards her.

    “Yeah. I should have enough water here to patch myself up.”

    “What are we going to do about all those creepy crawlies?!” Jim says, pointing towards the rapidly approaching horde of spiders from Otto’s body.

    “Don’t worry, I can handle them. You’d better get your suit back though,” F.F says.  

    “Righto! Once I’m all nice and snug in my suit and we’ll send those eight legged monsters scurrying back to the shadows!” Just as he is about to start crawling back towards his suit however the air behind F.F parts to reveal a woman, clutching a spear in her hand. She swings it downwards, impaling F.F. through the head. “F.F, NO” Jim shouts in shock, forgetting completely about his suit and flinging himself at the mysterious attacker. He wraps himself around her neck, yanking her backwards and away from his friend. She tries to grab him but Jim is quickly to slither away and around her body.

    F.F pulls themselves to their feet, the stab wound in their head still healing as they rush to help Jim. A large lizard man steps in front of them before they can, clutching a sword in his hand. F.F steps back as he swings it at her, narrowly missing adding yet another deep wound to their collection of injuries sustained today. They duck and weave around the flurry of attacks that follow before seeing an opportunity to attack themselves as a wide two handed hacking blow leaves Lizard Priest wide open. As F.F. moves to strike them though they are struck by his tail, knocking them away.

    As F.F recovers they find themselves surrounded by the spider swarm from before and Lizard Priest too can feel them climbing up his leg. He tries swatting them away but the numbers are too great and they are soon clambering all over him. F.F meanwhile opts to try and escape the spiders rather than fight them off, jumping into the air to avoid the main group of them. They then begin to eject spurts of water from their skin, sending the spiders that have manage to stay attached to them floating away. Leaving Lizard Priest at the mercy of the spiders she makes a beeline towards Kassandra, who has managed to grab hold of Jim by the mid-section and with a quick slash of her spear, she slices his head from the rest of his body.  

    “JIM” F.F howls in anguish, raising their hand and sending a barrage of plankton at Kassandra. They hit her in the arm, not breaking through the gauntlet but turning her attention towards them. As they get within striking range, F.F. jumps into the air to avoid a slash from the spear and drives a kick into the Spartan’s chest. She then lands, delivering a powerful jab which rocks Kassandra’s head back before firing into her chest point blank with a massive blob of plankton that sends her stumbling away towards the direction of the spiders.

    Satisfied that Kassandra is distracted for the moment, F.F then rushes over to Jim who looks down worriedly at his bisected body. “Don’t worry Jim, I can patch you up no problem.”

    “I wish that you could F.F. but it’s not just a simple wound,” Jim says quietly.

    “But I can fix you! Surely, I can fix you. Right?” F.F says, desperation in their voice.

    “Look, I’m not the smartest worm around. But even I can tell that you can’t. I would’ve been in the stomach of some feathered fiend by now if I hadn’t found that Super-Suit anyway so I guess I’ve had a good run. You’ve done more than enough already help me this far but hopefully I can ask you just one favour,” Jim says.

    “Of course, anything," F.F says, their voice trembling.

    “Make sure those bad guys eat dirt,” Jim says, forcing out a smile even despite the pain. With that his eyes close and F.F can feel tears welling up in their eyes as they bow their head in grief.

    Meanwhile Kassandra, having managed to rid herself of both of the plankton and spiders, turns her attention to Lizard Priest who is in much more trouble than she is. The spiders have covered just about every inch of him below the chest and some are beginning to crawl up onto his neck and head. He has managed to keep one arm free however and is hacking at the thick layer of arachnids with his sword.

    Suddenly a woman leaps out, seemingly from the pool of spiders. She lands on Lizard Priest, holding onto him with her legs and clamping her hands down on his upper and lower jaw. He tries to throw her off but she is surprisingly strong and the spiders are restricting his movement too much. Slowly she begins to prise open his mouth, spiders streaming down from her robes and crawling inside of it. He tries clamping his mouth shut but too many have already made their way inside and he begins to cough and splutter violently as they start to crawl down his throat. Kassandra tries to go and help him but the woman sends forth a tidal wave of spiders to intercept her. Forced to defend herself she can only watch in horror as the spiders completely overwhelm Lizard Priest, burying him in an avalanche of legs and fangs.

    Kassandra activates Ring of Chaos, sending forth a wave which blasts all the spiders away. As she backs up, she draws her bow, aiming it squarely at Mist, who stands eerily still. She seems to be looking past her, although it is hard to tell with a veil covering her face. Kassandra glances over, keeping Mist in her peripheral vision to see F.F striding towards her. “You killed my friend,” F.F says her tone venomous. “And you,” she says jabbing a finger at Mist. “It was because of your spiders that I couldn’t get to help him quicker.”

    “Your foolish friend wouldn’t have lived much longer anyway,” Mist says. “He needed to be eliminated for our plans to continue. Just like you two.”

    “Shut up. I’m going to kill both of you. I can do that much for Jim at least,” F.F shouts.

    “Well at least two of us are going to die here,” Kassandra says. “I guess we’ll soon find out who.” With the sun dipping low in the sky as evening draws near, the three women stand ready, each daring the other to make the first move.

    Chapter 4: The Final Girls[]

    Kassandra is the one who attacks first, releasing the arrow at Mist, who dodges out of the way of it. Spiders start to crawl out from cracks in the ground and up onto her, biting at any skin not covered by her armour. Kassandra hops around as if she is standing on hot coals, trying to dislodge the spiders but the more and more venom courses through her body she can feel her movements becoming more sluggish.

    F.F too finds themselves besieged by the arachnids as they break away from Lizard Priest’s corpse to attack a living target. Unlike Kassandra however the venom doesn’t affect her in the slightest and every spider she crushes leaves a gooey gunk she can absorb the water from. Mist, recognizing the spiders are not effecting them, makes a beeline for F.F to finish them off herself. Any plankton fired her way are intercepted by the spiders streaming down from her sleeves and when she gets close enough, she pounces on F.F, pinning her to the ground.

    As the pair struggle, Kassandra draws her bow once more, with the spiders threatening to overwhelm her. She activates Rain of Destruction, firing off a volley of arrows into the air in rapid succession. They fall down in a deadly hail, smashing through many of the spiders but more importantly also raining down upon F.F and Mist, piercing through their bodies in multiple places. As they both slump down in a heap, Kassandra can feel the spiders on her begin to disengage, dispersing away in the shadows. She takes a moment to rest, feeling her vitality returning as her immune system begins to fight off the effects spider venom.

    She looks over to her two opponents and is surprised to see F.F heaving Mist off of themselves, before carefully removing the arrows which are still imbedded in them, the wounds closing over as they do. Mist however simply lies motionless, having taken the brunt of the arrows and having no healing factor of her own.

    Kassandra unsheathes her sword and the Spear of Leonidas and rushes towards F.F, still feeling sluggish from the spider venom but knowing she can’t give her opponent the chance to recover. She swipes away a bombardment of plankton bullets which come hurtling through the air at her and chops the sword downwards at F.F who just about manages to roll out of the way. As they scramble to their feet Kassandra keeps up the pressure, making them have to focus on dodging the blade and not giving them time to counterattack. However she is surprised as F.F reacts to one of her attacks by sticking their arm up to block it, the sword embedding itself deep into the muscle. They then clamp the other hand down on top of it, holding it rigid in place.

    “Can’t use your sword if I have it trapped like this can you?” F.F says, the fingers on her hand contorting around to point at Kassandra. Before they can fire however the sword suddenly bursts into flames and F.F recoils back in shock. Kassandra releases the blade before thrusting her spear, which is also aflame, right into their chest. As the plankton try to heal the wounds, they are burned up in the fire which also begins to evaporate the water inside Atroe’s body around where the two blades are lodged.

    “I noticed before how you were draining the liquids from the guy with the tentacles,” Kassandra says. “And I overheard you saying you are made up of plankton. So my guess is you need water to function and, more importantly, to heal.” She yanks the spear out and swings it across in an arc, severing one of F. F’s arms and leaving it dangling uselessly. Another pair of blows gash deep into their legs, leaving F.F on their knees. In one last desperate attempt, they fire off a chunk of plankton from their still functioning arm but Kassandra side steps the obvious attack and they fly off harmlessly into the distance. She then goes to work opening up as many flaming wounds as she can, eventually leaving Atroe’s body a burning pyre, the screeching of the plankton trapped inside ringing out.

    Retrieving her sword from the body once the flames have died out, Kassandra ponders if she has any more targets to eliminate. As she is thinking about what her next move should be she gets a warning from Ikaros and from his birds eye view she can see Jim’s Super Suit slowly ambling its way towards her. She cuts off the link with Ikaros, turning around to face it, wondering if perhaps Jim had simply pretended to be dead. However what she sees instead is a black, grey, and yellow mushy pile, eyes and a mouth formed in the centre to create an illusion of a face.

    “I wasn’t aiming for you before,” the sludge says and Kassandra recognizes the voice as being F. F’s but much deeper. “Jim gave his life to trying to save me but that wasn’t all. He left this behind, all nice and full up of water. I think it’s fitting I use this to avenge him.” The right hand of the suit shoots free suddenly, slamming a punch into Kassandra’s face and sending her staggering. She recovers just in time to avoid F.F as they come flying in on the Pocket Rocket, leaping from it into a jumping kick. Kassandra jabs the spear into the torso of the suit but it bounces off harmlessly and the free hand from before hits her from behind, gripping her hard on the back of her neck.

    She reaches up to try and dislodge it but it’s hold is too strong and she is lashes out wildly at F.F as they get closer but the blows have no effect on the Super-Suit itself. F.F grabs Kassandra by the throat, leaning their head of pure plankton down so it’s right in her face. Several chunks of it break off and crawl over her face, entering into her mouth, ears and eyes and she screams out in fear. Her chest bursts open in a spray of blood and her body drops to the floor as F.F releases their grip on her, her last expression one of pure terror.

    Looking up to the skies, F.F remembers back to a time before she met Jolyne, when Whitesnake had come to drop off some discs he had acquired from prisoners. He had talked to them at great length about the idea of Heaven, a place where the righteous go when they die. F.F hopes that what he said about there being a heaven is true and that Jim is up there. With his kindness and determination to help others they had sensed within him the same spirit that they saw in Jolyne. Surely such characteristics would surely earn him a place in paradise now? The mystery person who gave them this mission had promised F.F that they would reunite them with Jolyne and F.F hopes that maybe they can do something to bring Jim back as well. “That’s what is so great about having intelligence,” they murmur, “It allows you to have hope for the future.”

    Expert's Opinion[]

    11th Place: The Pain, 11 Points

    The Pain had the perfect trifecta of last placed royale warriors; he was noticeably evil, completely insane and his powers were not potent enough to kill people quick enough to make those previous two points less of an issue.

    10th Place: Captain Grime, 21 Points

    Grime didn't have any real flaws as such but he also lacked anything special, just being a pretty strong toad man with a lot of combat experience. He wasn't physically the most powerful, he wasn't the most intelligent and he didn't have any creative powers to give his opponents anything to think about in a fight.

    9th Place: Baron Samedi (Grimm), 35 Points

    Samedi had the most polarizing placements out of any of the combatants and where people placed him really came down to how they thought he would utilize his zombies. In the end he finished third from bottom mainly because outside of his ability to create zombies he lacked the combat ability to compete with the other warriors nor was he stealthy enough to stay off their radar while his zombies did the work.

    8th Place: Tai Lung, 43 Points

    Tai Lung was probably the most physically powerful and technically skilled warrior in this royale but this just painted a massive target on his back and his arrogance meant he had no allies on his own, meaning he would inevitably be overwhelmed by warriors working together to take him down.

    7th Place: Kraab, 44 Points

    Kraab had exactly the same problem as Tai Lung, being a massive mechanical crab cyborg means you've inviting people to team up against you which will lead to your eventual defeat no matter how strong you are.

    6th Place: Doctor Octopus, 57 Points

    Octavius finished smack bang in the middle of the rankings with his tentacles being powerful and flexible enough for him to put up a good fight against pretty much anyone else in the royale. Unfortunately said tentacles also made his mental state very volatile and this would lead to him acting irrationally and impulsively, a death sentence in active combat.

    5th Place: Earthworm Jim, 62 Points

    Jim had many flaws which would ordinarily place a warrior near the bottom of a royale namely that he is rash, brash and not particularly smart so would throw himself into fights with reckless abandon. However he also had a Super-Suit that was impervious to damage meaning his opponents had to target his head in order to do defeat him. His kind-hearted nature also meant he could pick up allies who could help him get further than the lone wolf contestants below him but eventually his luck would run out against smarter and more composed warriors.

    4th Place: Lizard Priest, 63 Points

    Lizard Priest has all the right components to go far in a battle royale. He's a skilled fighter, has a variety of useful magic abilities and is used to working as part of a group because of his role as an adventurer. However his miracles being limited to only four a day eventually left him with only his physical capabilities to get him by and that wasn't enough to break into the top three.

    3rd Place: Madame Mist, 74 Points

    Mist was basically the Pain or Samedi but if they were actually able to be stealthy. Her spiders were a lot more subtle than hornets or zombies and given she's spent literal centuries plotting and scheming from the shadows she had no problem simply staying out of sight and letting the spiders do her work for her. She's not much of a fighter so once she revealed herself she was toast but she could keep herself hidden long enough to snatch third.

    2nd Place: Kassandra, 90 Points

    Kassandra had basically no flaws and was unfortunately to only finish second. She is a highly skilled fighter, with a ton of equipment, a magic system which is easy to use and has a lot of variety, by far the best at stealth and affable enough to make allies easily. This allowed her to approach this royale in whatever way she wanted, unlike the warriors below her who were limited to one style. She finished second not through any fault of her own but simply because the winner was just better.

    1st Place: Foo Fighters, 99 Points

    Foo Fighters won this royale because of their unique physiology which meant that actually eliminating them a really difficult task for any of the other warriors, especially with them not initially knowing about their reliance on water. Combine this with their intelligence and creative use of said physiology plus their ability to make allies meant that Foo Fighters finished top in everyone's votes and ended with a perfect record.

    DFederal Epilogue (Not for Pages)[]

    “Holy shit F.F. I thought I had a good house but this is somehow even better,” Jolyne says as she looks around her friend’s mansion.

    “Damn it I wish I had been in a royale,” Ermes chimes in. “Maybe I should be rooming with you instead,” she continues, jabbing F.F with her elbow playfully.

    “That would be so fun!” F.F says. “I’ve actually already got a friend staying with me but there’s plenty of room for you as well Ermes.”

    “A friend, eh?”

    “Yeah, we were in our royale together, ended up teaming up and since his house is way smaller than mine, I figured why not let him stay here.”

    “Ooh a guy? Is he hot?” Jolyne asks with a smile.

    “I’m just a colony of plankton so I don’t know much about human attraction. But I don’t think you would be into him. He’s an earthworm you see” F.F replies.

    “Oh. Then yeah, you’re right,” Jolyne says laughing. “Anyway we just swung by to let you know that we’re holding a party to celebrate you arriving here. It’s going to be at my great grandfather’s place. It’s not far from here and I think you’d like it; he has this massive pool in the garden and-”

    “He has a pool!” F.F says their eyes lighting up. “Then let’s go now come on,” they says, grabbing Jolyne’s arm and practically dragging them outside, while Ermes follows after with a grin on her face.


    Meanwhile in the red light district a tiger with a lame eye looks up at a neon pink sign with the words “Pussycats” blazing out. He raps on the door with his claw and after a few moments a slot opens and a pair of yellow eyes look down at him before there is the sound of a lock being lifted. An anthropomorphic leopard opens the door and looks at the tiger.

    “And who are you?” Tai Lung says.

    “My name is SK,” the tiger says sheepishly, averting his eyes. “I met up with NL a couple of days ago, he told me to come here for some fun”.

    “Ah, yes we’ve been expecting you, come on in,” Tai Lung says, stepping out of the way to reveal the bar area where there are already two lions says, one with a red mane and the other the tiger recognises as NL. He slinks in through the door before Tai Lung closes it behind him.


    Lizard Priest gazes upon the wheel of cheese in front of him hungrily, a welcome treat in such an unusual city. Before he can tuck in, he is distracted by a knock on the door of his house. He sighs and goes to answer it, opening the door to find a knight stood before him, a big yellow sun emblem across his chest. “You are Lizard Priest, correct?”

    “I am. What brings you here oh noble knight?”

    “I have been sent to invite you to an audience with King Wass!” Solaire says cheerfully.

    “A king you say. Well how could an adventurer such as me turn down such an opportunity.” He thinks for a moment before looking back longingly at his meal. “You wouldn’t mind if I brought my dinner with me, would you?” he says gesturing to the cheese.

    “What a marvellous thing,” Solaire says excitedly as he peers at the large cheese wheel. “It is yellow and round and large. Just like my precious Sun This is surely a good omen! Of course you may bring it"


    "How dare they imprison me for all those years" David Koresh rants to himself as he walks down the street to his new home in the middle-class district. "And then they took away my hard earned victories! Disregarded my ass! How dare they treat a prophet of God in such a disgraceful way. I'll show them. I'll show them all!" As he turns the corner onto one of the side roads he is snapped out of his angry raving by the most incredible sight. Floating in the street in front of him is a glittering, glimmering, shining collection of objects, that looks as if a mirror has shattered but all the glass stays floating in the air as if frozen by time. Koresh finds himself mesmerized by the sight and he cannot help but approach it, it's pulsating mass attracting him like a moth to a flame.

    When he gets close enough he reaches out his hand to touch it and it surprised to see his hand disappear inside of it. He slowly retracts his hand, realizing he has stumbled across something special. "This must have been a gift from God!" he mumbles "Perhaps a way out of this place? Or maybe something I can use to exact my revenge." As he stands amazed at what he has found a sudden low but bellowing moan comes from inside of the rift and the next thing he knows he is being sent flying through the air, crashing into a nearby dumpster. He groans in pain, looking down in blearily at the massive gashes in his chest. As he looks back at the miracle he sees something large, brown and covered in thick hair emerge from within it, before he slips into unconsciousness.