Inuit Raider vs Maori Warrior

The Inuit raider, terroriser of Canadian whalers and sworn enemy of the Cree. The Maori warrior, the cannibalistic murderer of New Zealands. Both fought the same British enemy, but who was a redcoat's true nightmare? Will the Maori's heart be frozen by the Inuit? Will the Inuit be killed for mana by the Maori?

WHO IS THE DEADLIEST!?

The Māori (pronounced Māori: [ˈmaːɔ.ɾi], or commonly [ˈmaʊɹi] by English speakers) are the native or indigenous Polynesian people of New Zealand (Aotearoa – The Long White Cloud). They arrived in New Zealand from eastern Polynesia in several waves at some time before 1300 CE. Over several centuries in isolation, the Māori developed a unique culture with their own language, a rich mythology, distinctive crafts and performing arts. They formed a tribal society based on East Polynesian social customs and organisation. Horticulture flourished using plants they introduced, and after about 1450 a prominent warrior culture emerged.

The Shark Tooth Club or the Leiomano is a weapon used by various Polynesian tribes, which harnessed the brute force of the ocean's top predator. The club is shaped like the head of a spade with shark's teeth inset around the edges, with the tiger shark being the preferred donor. In some clubs, the handle has a marlin's bill set into it to serve as a dagger.

The Taiaha is a traditional weapon of the Māori of New Zealand, sharp on one end, with a slicing club on the other. An image of the weapon is incorporated into the official badge of the New Zealand Army.Mau rakau is the martial art that teaches the use of the taiaha and other Māori weapons in combat. As with other martial arts styles, students of the taiaha spends years mastering the skills of timing, balance and co-ordination necessary to wield the weapon effectively.

A hoeroa is a type of traditional hand weapon of the Māori, the indigenous people of New Zealand. It is traditionally a whalebone long club. The tool was four and five feet in length and was used as a striking weapon, stabbing spear, and missile weapon. It was used as a javelin, thrusted at close range or thrown at long range.

The Mere (pronounced mehreh) was a traditional hand weapon of New Zealand, found only on the South Island. In combat, the mere was more commonly used for thrusting and stabbing, although it was highly effective for delivering axe-like blows, being more than able to pulverize a cow's skull in one blow. The mere was a symbol of chieftainship and was passed down as a valuable heirloom. Traditionally, individual mere were named, and were said to possess a mana of their own.

Inuit are an indigenous tribe of Canada. They live in the Northernmost part of the continent and have prospered for 3000 years. They, just like their southern counterparts, survived off the land and the sea, hunting for caribou, walrus and muskox. Unlike tribes that lived in the plains such as the Apache, the Iroquois and the Cherokee, the Inuit lived off almost purely of meat. In 1576, the Inuit encountered Martin Frobisher, who became part of their mythology as the first well documented European they had met. After that, Euro-Inuit relations didn’t go very far. The natives were hit hard by the European diseases, but since they inhabited the northern, less hospitable parts of Canada, the government didn’t have much care for them and they didn’t engage in any serious armed conflicts, unlike their southern cousins.

The Inuit war club is made of wood and stone. It’s a deadly weapon, extremely effective at dealing blunt, internal damage to enemies. The solid wooden handle is very unlikely to break and the stone tip can shatter a man’s skull or batter a bull walrus to death. It’s swung with a single hand and offers a high degree of mobility and flexibility in combat.

The Inuit Hunting Harpoon differs from their fishing spear (Kakivak) in that its shape is straighter; it also has a tip made of stone. It’s used for big game hunting, such as muskox, caribou, seal, walrus or even polar bear. In battle, it’s a deadly weapon that goes through flesh and inflicts grievous wounds with a sharp tip that can even go through the wooden plate armor of the Cree Nations. It can also be thrown to kill prey and foe alike from afar.

The Inuit cable-backed bow is a weapon unique to their tribes. It has a cable made of animal skin which is tightened to increase the effectiveness of the bow. When the bow is drawn, the cable stretches and the wooden shaft bends. What makes the Inuit bow different from others is its material. The shaft is made of solid Caribou antlers and the cable of animal tendon. This gave the Inuit bow the power needed to hunt down large Arctic animals, and enemy Indians if needed.

The Snow Knife is more of a tool than a weapon, but can double as a deadly blade if needed. While short, its ivory blade can cut through solid ice to carve igloos. It is small, light and fast, allowing quick stabbing and cutting movements. Like any other dagger/knife, its short blade allows more force to be transferred to the tip of the blade when thrusted, which makes it effective against armor. In close quarters, the knife can be use as a backup weapon if other options fail.

Inuit, while more peaceful than tribes such as the tomahawk-swinging Apache, took part in warmongering actions such as raiding, which also targeted European whalers and settlers, although conflicts between the Inuits and the Europeans were brief and small-scaled, with no serious consequences apart from a little bit of fish or whale stolen. However, against traditional enemies like the Cree, the Inuit showed as much mercy as they showed fear: none. In such battles, the Inuit’s armor, carved of walrus ivory, provided superb protection against arrows and spears. It was also backed by thick caribou leather and a fur coat, providing defense against ailments such as the cold, as well as against enemy attacks.

X-Factors

Brutality: Maori:90 Inuit:83

The Inuit raider is without a doubt a fierce warrior with no remorse at killing people. However, he's facing a man who was raised to kill and goddamn eat his enemies.

Experience Maori:82 Inuit:73

The Inuit people were hunters and fishermen, and their main activity wasn't raiding. Yes, they did fight and raid the Crew and the European whalers, but not to the point that I'd consider them a warrior civilization. The Maori, on the other hand, is built around fighting and killing. This gives him a decisive edge in killing and fighting experience.

Physicality

Maori:80 Inuit:80

What the Inuit lacks in diet, he makes up for with his harsh lifestyle. The Inuit people had to live, walk, breathe and hunt in an environment leagues above the Maori in terms of harshness. This built him into a man built for strength and stamina, which should close the gap between the vegetable diet of the Maori and the meat diet of the Inuit.

Durability Maori: 82 Inuit: 87

Even excluding the armor, the Inuit's harsh lifestyle and environment built him to be able to take a hellish amount of punishment and keep going.

Personal Edges[]

Close Range: Shark Tooth Club vs War Club

Edge: Shark Tooth Club

This one is a close one, but I give it to the Shark Tooth because of its slashing potential. While the Inuit club can deal heavy blunt trauma, the Maori's one can deal both blunt and slashing damage. However, this slashing power is going to be mostly stopped by the Inuit's armor.

Mid-Range: Taiaha vs Hunting Harpoon

Edge: Hunting Harpoon

Another close one, but it goes to the harpoon. The two are of similar length, and the Taiaha packs a deadly close quarters stab, but the harpoon doesn't fall far too behind in the stabbing category. What truly makes the harpoon a great weapon is the rope attached to it, which I see the Inuit use to entangle, confuse and trick the Maori. The rope also means the Inuit can retrieve the harpoon after it's thrown, unlike the Taiaha.

Long Range: Hoeroa vs Cable Backed Bow

Edge: Cable Backed Bow

This one isn't really a contest. It's a throwing spear made of bone against a unique bow with the power to bring down a 300 lbs caribou. The CBB has a cable made of elastic animal tendon, which gives even more strength to the already deadly North American Bow. The only real advantage the Hoeroa has is that it can also be used as a melee weapon, and this is about which can kill the opponent at a distance, nothing else.

Special Weapons: Mere vs Snow Knife

Edge: Mere

The Snow Knife, as cool as the name sounds like, isn't a battlefield weapon. It's a tool used to carve ice to make igloos, unlike the Mere, which is an ancestral and honored weapon capable of smashing a bull's skull. The American knife fighting skills of the Inuit won't close the gap between the two weapons.

Deadliest Warrior: Inuit

While the Maori is a fierce fighter in close quarters combat, the Inuit with his bow, his harpoon and his armor will dominate at long range, which will let him kill the Maori without even letting him get close. There's also the fact that the Maori is unarmored, which nearly nullifies the advantage the Shark Club has, which is slashing power. The only way for the Maori to come out victorious is to close the gap as quickly as possible and go in with the Taiaha and the Shark Tooth, and even then the Inuit isn't defenceless: a single good strike with that War Club and the Maori loses a bone. Overall, the Inuit hits harder at long range, can take much more damage, and can hold his own in melee.

Battle[]

On the surface of the shallow seas of the Arctic Tundra of Canada, a man watches the water with vigilance on his kayak. It’s an Inuit Raider, now on fishing duty to carry food back to his village. The fisherman has his harpoon ready, and, with a lightning quick throw, impales a salmon. He laughs and raises his rope in joy, then starts pulling, but the rope is blocked. He looks at the surface of the sea and sees another canoe, with an unknown man on it, but more importantly, the man is stabbing HIS salmon with his spear. The stranger pulls the harpoon out of the fish, which he throws into his canoe, laughing and throwing a taunting look at the Inuit. The raider is surprised and angered by this sudden turn of events. He yells angrily at the man in Inuktitut that the salmon is his. The thief, a Maori Warrior, points his spear challengingly at the fisherman. That crosses the line. The Inuit pulls his harpoon back to him and rows the kayak at high speeds towards the Maori. The Polynesian is caught off guard by the rower’s speed, and gets his canoe rammed by the Canadian’s boat. The raider then grabs his harpoon and thrusts it at the Maori, who counters with a thrust of his hoeroa, but is locked in a disadvantageous position because of the ram, having to turn to his side to fight the Inuit, who faces towards his front. The Inuit thrusts again, and the Maori blocks once more, before throwing a thrust of his own with his hoeroa. The Canadian blocks the strike and entangles the club-spear with his harpoon’s rope. He pulls with his full force, knocking the warrior off balance. The canoe tips, then reversing it upside-down. The Polynesian escapes his boat, diving underwater and swimming up to the coast as the Inuit chases him with his kayak, throwing the hoeroa away. As the Maori reaches the beach, he quickly runs inland and picks up his taiaha. The Inuit also reaches the coasts and yells at his opponent. The Maori, however, takes an unexpected action.

Maori: Ka mate, ka mate! ka ora! ka ora! (It is death! It is death! It is life! It is life!)

Ka mate! ka mate! ka ora! ka ora! (It is death! It is death! It is life! It is life!)

The warrior starts dancing and chanting menacingly, slapping his body parts and showing off his tattoos. It’s the haka war dance. The Inuit is stunned by the sudden dance, but chooses not to be intimidated. He takes out a traditional drum out of his kayak and starts his own dance, chanting and beating his instrument. After dancing a chanting a while, the Maori sticks his tongue out as a sign of cannibalism. The Inuit doesn’t get the message, but drops his drum and points his harpoon. The two roar at each-other and charge, spears drawn. The Maori thrusts violently, and the Inuit sidesteps. The raider then entangles the Polynesian’s legs with his rope and pulls, tripping the warrior and knocking him on his back. The Canadian attempts to stab his downed opponent, but the latter rolls aside in time. He then swings his taiaha with the slashing club facing towards the Native Indian, who moves his face back just in time to avoid the strike. The Maori keeps spinning his spear-club above his head, advancing towards the Inuit who keeps backing away, until he attempts to block the taiaha with his harpoon, only for it to break in half.

Maori: HAAH!

The Maori yells at the Inuit and thrusts a few time with the Taiaha as the Inuit keeps stepping aside, getting his armor grazed a few time. He punches the Maori in the face with his ivory gauntlet, knocking him down, and runs back to his kayak, getting his cable backed bow. The Maori gets back up and sees the Inuit drawing his bow, followed by an arrow flying towards him. The warrior quickly duck, narrowly dodging the projectile, but is hit in the shoulder by a second arrow. The raider draws his bow a third time, but the Polynesian throws his taiaha at him, hitting him in the chest but failing to punch through the thick layers of bones, ivory and leather. The two pull the projectiles out of themselves and grab a new weapon. The Maori arms himself with the Shark Toothed Club as the Inuit brandishes his War Club. The two close in and lock clubs. The raider kicks his opponent away, then swings from the right at the warrior’s head, but the latter ducks and stabs into the raider with his swordfish bill. He pulls back his bloodied hilt as the Arctic native yelps in pain. The Maori laughs at the Canadian and swings with his club. The raider blocks with his bone arm plate then strikes at the warrior's side with his club. The Maori is knocked to the ground, holding his wound, and the Inuit attempts to strike at his downed enemy, but the Polynesian rolls aside and gets back up, then swings his bladed club at the Canadian Indian, who blocks with his own weapon. The Maori, however, uses this opportunity to kick the Arctic Native in the guts, knocking him to the ground and making him drop his club. The Inuit gets back up in a hurry and draws his snow knife. The Maori grabs his mere with his other hand, dual-wielding his weapons. The two charge at each other, and the Polynesian swings his club. The Inuit ducks and tackles his foe into the ground before stabbing his ivory blade into the cannibal’s arm. The latter yells in pain and rips the weapon out of his arm as the Canadian runs back to grab his club. As the Maori gets back up, the Inuit stabs an arrow into his thigh, making him yelp in pain. However, the pain isn’t over, as the Inuit starts landing the biggest beating any Native North American of Polynesian ever witnessed. The war club is first smashed across the Maori’s face in a sideways swing, drawing blood and cracking some teeth. The Inuit then swings the club in the opposite direction with another swing, breaking the cannibal’s lower jaw. The Canadian follows the strike by grabbing his club with both hands for a downwards swing to the Maori’s head, causing a depressed skull fracture. The hit is followed by an upwards swing, which knocks the Maori on the ground. The Polynesian will eventually die, and is unconscious, but the Inuit is restless. He runs up to the Polynesian and lifts his club towards the skies.

Inuit: RAAAAAAAAAAAH!

The raider brings his club down onto his foe’s face, smashing it in and covering his already bloody club blood with even more gore. The Inuit brandishes his club, yelling in victory. He later retreats towards his village with his salmon, where he tells his battle’s tale to every villager, who all listen to him with attention as if it is a divine legend of a hero and a demon.

Experts' Opinion[]

Both were stone-age warriors who didn’t use metal weapons in their arsenal, instead relying on natural and organic materials with creativity, but the Inuit ended snatching that edge. Both had good weapons, but the fact that the Inuit had a bow and armor while the Maori only had melee to mid range weaponry meant death to the Polynesian. Added to the raiding tactics and durability of the Inuit, it became clear who was the winner.