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Family is all.
— Hector "Tio" Salamanca

Leonel and Marco Salamanca, most commonly known as "the Cousins" were twins working for the Juárez Cartel as hitmen. The Cousins act as silent and efficient killers, executing without question.

They were given the task of killing Walter White for his role in the death of their cousin, Tuco Salamanca, but were later convinced to go after Hank Schrader instead, who actually killed Tuco.

During their confrontation with Hank, Leonel breaks his after being hit by Hank's car. Marco meanwhile got shot by Frank using Leonel's guns after trying to get his ax to kill Hank. Leonel survives the confrontation but has had his legs amputated. Gustavo Fring later orders Mike Ehrmantraut to kill Leonel via fatal injection to prevent him from revealing information.

Battle vs. Anton Chigurh (by Tomahawk23)

No battle written.

Winner: Anton Chigurh

Expert's Opinion


To see the original battle, weapons, and votes, click here.

Battle vs. Hänsel and Gretel (Black Lagoon) (by SPARTAN 119)

Cartel Compound outside Cuidad Juarez, Mexico

The cartel compound was strewn with bodies, riddled with bullets or hacked apart with a battle axe. In the middle of this carnage, two Romanian snuff film survivors turned assassins had just finished washing up and getting dressed after their macabre tradition of drinking and bathing in the blood of their vanquished foes, the tradition that earned the two assassins known only as "Hansel and Gretal" the nickname of "The Vampire Twins".

The twins were in Mexico on their international mission of vengeance, there latest target was an associate of Juarez Cartel Don Elario who was involved in deals with the Romanian mafia syndicate that had originally kidnapped them. The twins had already wiped out the syndicate, and now, they would slaughter anyone associated with them.

Even if it Elario had escaped, the associate was dead. Now, it was onto the next target. But something would delay their departure from the mansion: two men in identical outfits walking across the pool, towards the mansion.

"I think we have more company, sora mea", "Hansel" said.

"Let's make sure they are properly welcomed", "Gretal" replied as she laughed darkly. She then got out her B.A.R and fired out the window at the two men.

Marco and Lionel Salamanca dove for cover behind a low wall as the bullets from Gretal's B.A.R flew over their head. Lionel Salamanca grabbed an M4 carbine of a dead cartel thug lying near the low wall as Marco drew his sidearm.

Both of the Salamanca brothers fired their weapons at the window that "Gretal" had fired out of. The Romanian girl ducked just in time to avoid the return fire, and reloaded her rifle, before firing off another burst of .30-06 rounds, blowing through the wall the Salamanca twins stood behind.

Marco Salamanca made a hand signal to his brother. The meaning was obvious: "Cover me, I'll go around the side and flank them".

Lionel nodded and fired a long burst from the M4 at his foe, suppressing the shooter in the window, as Marco ran around the side of the building and busted through a side door, pistol in hand.

At that moment, Marco Salamanca felt a sharp pain in the side of his head, and then, nothing at all. Marco never knew that there was a second child-assassin, who was hiding behind the kitchen island, and had sprung from hiding place and buried a battle axe in the back his head with a jumping strike.

Lionel saw his brother attacked by the second child-assassin, and charged forward, firing his M4 carbine from the hip to suppress Gretal, who was still in the window. Lionel kicked fired a three round burst through a wide window at "Hansel", striking him three times in the chest.

The child assassin collapsed to the floor as Lionel burst in, yelling "Marco!"

But it was soon became clear to Lionel that he was too late, the a battle axe was buried deep into his brother's skull, the blow had killed him instantly.

With a look of pure fury on his face, Lionel Salamanca raised his trademark melee weapon, his chrome plated fire axe and walked over the the wounded Hansel. The child assassin reached for the revolver concealed at his side, but he was two late.

"This is what happens to people who attack the Salamanca Family!", Lionel said, before he brought the axe down on "Hansel's" head, instantly killing the Romanian twin and spraying blood and brain matter around the room.

Suddenly, Lionel heard a female voice yell "fratelli meu!" from the hallway leading into the kitchen, followed by the cocking of a gun. Lionel dove the ground just in time, as automatic weapons fire drowned out all other sounds.

"Gretal" swept her B.A.R. across the room, determined to avenge her fallen brother. Bullets flew through the air, blowing through wood, shattering glass and ceramics, and blowing apart the granite countertop. The kitchen of the Elario mansion was trashed, but Lionel Salamanca was still alive.

A soon as the last shell casing hit the ground, Lionel Salamanca rolled out from behind the counter and took aim with his Colt pistol. He pulled the trigger seven times, emptying the entire magazine. Gretal was struck all seven times by .45 caliber rounds.

The second of the "Vampire Twins" fell face down on the floor, dead.

WINNER: Salamanca Cousins

Expert's Opinion

The "Vampire Twins" were formidable adverasaries with a great deal of experience in combat, having repeatedly faced skilled, heavily armed adversaries. In the end, however, the Cousins' more modern weapons, and emphasis on well-placed shots proved superior to the Vampire Twin's "spray-and-pray" tactics.

To see the original battle, weapons, and votes, click here.