Pirates are known commonly as "Smokers" because of the smoke from oil-powered machines, such as personal water craft and airplanes, which they make use of. They also apply great cultural significance to the smoking of cigarettes, even to the point of giving their children cigarettes.

The Smokers obtain many of their wares as marauders and by raiding the settlements of the surface. Many Smokers appear to be quite sadistic and revel in murder and carnage; often their reputation precedes them.

The base of the Smokers is the rusted old carcass of an oil tanker, referred to as the Deez, which is revealed to be the Exxon Valdez in a brief shot. Although the tanker no longer has any functional engines, the Smokers still have a large supply of crude oil aboard the tanker, and apparently a small oil refinery, as they are able to refine the crude oil into gasoline and diesel fuel to power the jet skis, planes, and other machines they make use of. The Deacon also mentions refining but states that they are running out of "the black stuff" and the "go-juice" rapidly, and that they only have "two lunars" (or months) left of it. The Smokers have also hoarded large quantities of firearms, heavy artillery, ammunition, |spam, paper, tobacco, cigarettes, whiskey, and "Black Death" Vodka aboard the tanker. The Smokers move the tanker by use of dozens of oars that stick out of the barnacle-encrusted hull.

The captain of the tanker and also the leader of the Smokers is looked up to as a messianic figure, as he has promised to lead the Smokers to the mythical Dryland, and in line with this quasi-religious nature, he is referred to as "Deacon". The Deacon, or "Deac", has an intense hatred for anything of the old world, especially sails, instead preferring the mechanical machines, and believes that his aim to raid atolls is a "crusade". He teaches his men a philosophy of "take and ye shall receive." The Smokers also worship a former historical captain of the tanker, "Saint Joe" (original Exxon Valdez Cpt Joseph Hazelwood).

The Deacon's inner circle is well organized and includes a man with medical knowledge, and a man who follows the Deacon around with a ledger and a top hat who records for posterity everything that happens and who also informs the Deacon of various statistics he needs to know. The Deacon's lieutenant or second-in-command is a large and imposing man of Scandinavian descent, referred to as "|the Nord", who is reminiscent of a viking. The Nord likes to be in the thick of the action and delights in murder, leading the raids on atolls and also posing as a spy for reconnaissance. Smokers refer to each other as "cousins".

The primary goal of the Smokers in the film is to find an orphan girl named Enola (Tina Majorino), who as myth states came from the legendary Dryland, and has directions to it on a tattoo placed on her back. What the Deacon plans to do with Dryland is unclear though. In the extended cut, the Deacon claims he wishes to create a "church of eternal growth" for the Smokers.

(From Wikipedia)

Battle vs. OpFor (Call of Duty) (by Samurai234)

OpFor: Darkred.png Darkred.png Darkred.png Darkred.png Darkred.png Darkred.png

Smokers: Grey.png Grey.png Grey.png Grey.png Grey.png Grey.png

Off the coast of a Middle-Eastern sea, just 200 yards from the mainland, A large ship carrying six smokers is sailing along the sea. Suddenly, one of the Smokers hears a loud whistiling noise and looks ahead over the bow. The whistle is coming from an RPG-7 and it's flying right at them! The smoker was lucky to jump off at the right time, but the rocket blew a hole in the ship, causing it to sink. The smokers grab as many weapons as they can, and they head to the life boats. Meanwhile, six OpFor members, one of them who gired the RPG-7, also grab their weapons to take their enemies head on. As the smokers approach the land, they run into the OpFor members. Both teams open fire on each other with their rifles, taking out a man from both sides.

OpFor: Darkred.png Darkred.png Darkred.png Darkred.png Darkred.png

Smokers: Grey.png Grey.png Grey.png Grey.png Grey.png

As the firefight countines, the a smoker armed with an M60 manages to take out a OpFor member. However, another OpFor member armed with a RPD takes him out.

OpFor: Darkred.png Darkred.png Darkred.png Darkred.png

Smokers: Grey.png Grey.png Grey.png Grey.png

The smokers decide to retreat while the OpFor members As they countine to run, one OpFor member armed with a mini-Uzi manages to take out two smokers.

OpFor: Darkred.png Darkred.png Darkred.png Darkred.png

Smokers: Grey.png Grey.png

However, he runs out of ammo, and a smoker armed with a MP5 manages to take him out.

OpFor: Darkred.png Darkred.png Darkred.png

Smokers: Grey.png Grey.png

The smoker swicthes to his Taurus PT99AF and looks for the OpFor. He spot one and fires, missing. He catches up to him, points the gun to head, and pulls the trigger. Much to his dissapointment, the gun is out of ammo. The OpFor member pulls out a desert eagle and blows the smoker's head up.

OpFor: Darkred.png Darkred.png Darkred.png

Smokers: Grey.png

The OpFor member meets up with his two commrades, and they enter a building, thinking the last smoker might be in there. However, the last smoker is actually outside manning a M2 Aircraft Quad Mount. He riddles the building with .50 cal bullets. tearing it down. One OpFor member was able to get out, but the other two weren't so lucky, and were crushed by the fall debris.

OpFor: Darkred.png

Smokers: Grey.png

The last smoker laughs and smokes a cigarette in victory. However the last OpFor member is still alive, and he fires a rocket from his RPG at him, killing the smoker, and blowing up the mount.

OpFor: Darkred.png


The OpFor raises his fist in the air and yells in victory.

Winner: OpFor

Expert's Opinion

While the Smokers are a scary force, they mostly attack in the sea, and were not as good on land. They were also not as well trained as OpFor.

To see the original battle, weapons and votes, click here.

Battle vs. Rangers of the Order (by Samurai234)



A squad of Rangers wearing facemasks find an old port. Nearby, they see group of Smokers, who have taken residence inside a rusting factory. One Ranger, holding a Volt Driver, asks in russian, "How are they breathing up here?" A second Ranger, armed with a Bastard, answers "It's probably because of all the tar in there lungs." , pointing at the Smokers cancer sticks. Meanwhile, a Smoker operating a M2 Aircraft Quad Mount sees the Rangers and starts fireing down on them. "Take cover!" shouts the Ranger leader, armed with a Kalash 2012. The Rangers escape instant death, but the Volt Driver Ranger is hit in the leg. He responds by hitting the Smoker right between the eyes.


The smokers take notice that gunner has been killed. They soon open fire with everything they got. The Ranger leader motions to advance. The Volt Driver Ranger limps behind the others, only to be shot in the chest by the Smoker leader and his M-16.


The Ranger leader kills a Smoker with his Kalash 2012.


The Bastard-welding Ranger kills yet another smoker.


A remaining Smoker uses his MP5 to kill the Bastard Ranger and a second one armed with a Hellsing.


As the Smoker leader runs inside the factory, the Ranger leader kills the MP5 Smoker.


The Ranger leader takes cover next to the door. The two leaders fire back and forth, emptying there assault rifle's last magazine. The smoker runs off, throwing his now useless gun away, while the Ranger leader also drops his gun, taking one of his fallen Ranger's Hellsing. He soon is chasing the Smoker leader. He fires a few arrows, but misses. The Smoker pulls out his Taurus PT99AF. He empty's a few rounds by shooting at the Ranger, who dodges every one. The Smoker knocks down some junk, so he can gain some distance. He runs ahead while the Ranger carefully climbs over the pile. The Smoker stops, wheezing. He takes out a ciggarette to calm his nerves. He takes a long drag before getting shot through the neck with a arrow!


The Ranger says in Russian "Smoking will kill you, you know." before chuckling and walking away.

Winner: Rangers

Expert's Opinion

Please consider a contribution by writing an expert's opinion as to why the Rangers won.

To see the original battle, weapons and votes, click here.

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