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Let's put an smile on that face.
— The Joker

An insane but brilliant criminal mastermind, the Joker is an anarchist murderer that appeared in the Gotham crime world shortly after the appearance of the Batman. Although his origins are shadowed in mystery, ranging from gambling debts to abusive family, one thing is clear; his intent is sheer chaos to reign over Gotham City. 

His group of hired thugs originally robbed banks, with little to no other purpose. Soon after Batman appears, however, the Joker decides to plunge Gotham into anarchy. Gathering several of Gotham's leading criminal bosses, the Joker agrees to murder the Batman at the cost of half the money that Lau, an illegitimate Chinese accountant, takes away from Gotham for safekeeping. One criminal boss, Gamboi, places a bounty on the Joker because of disrespect, but is murdered by his own men later that night. 

With his deal made, the Joker begins a reign of terror over Gotham that involves the assassinations of several political figures, demanding the identity of the Batman. A close ally of Batman, the District Attorney Harvey Dent, later reveals at a press conference that he is Batman. The Joker attempts to attack Dent, but is stopped by Commissioner Gordon and Batman. 

This is revealed as a ruse, however, as the Joker's men kidnap both Dent and his fiance Rachel Dawes. Despite Batman's best efforts, Dawes is killed by a large explosion while Dent is mentally and physically scarred. The Joker, meanwhile, orchestrates a plan to escape from prison, which succeeds. With the once morally just Dent broken, the Joker claims Gotham as his city from the other criminal bosses. 

The Joker, now in control of the streets, allows all citizens to leave on two ferries; each is prepared with bombs. The Joker reveals that each of the ferries has the detonator for the other ship, and that if no ship explodes by midnight he will destroy them both. Much to his disappointment, however, neither ship makes a move and he is defeated in combat by Batman. 

His back-up plan, however, has succeeded. Corrupting Harvey Dent, the Joker twists the broken man's mind into a path of vengeance against those responsible for Rachel's death. With his plan complete, the Joker is left gleefully laughing in victory as Batman tries to stop the once White Knight of Gotham, only to be forced to kill him when he threatens Commisioner Gordon's son. 

Battle vs. Vaas Montenegro (by Cfp3157 and WanderingSkull)[]

This warrior won a Battle of the Month Award
This warrior won a Modern Battle of the Year Award

Prologue: The Calm Before the Storm

The Rook Islands, to any outsider they’d look like a beautiful sight, its lush green jungles, exotic animals of varying colors and shades, the crystal clear waters that would drift towards its golden beaches. It was a truly paradise and jewel in the Pacific Ocean. Or at least it would be if without all of the dangers that wanted to maim or sell you into slavery. And Vaas Montenegro was one such of these men, The self-proclaimed King Of The Rook Islands.

One such man was learning the true nature nature of his situation as he was being chased throughout the jungles. His rushed attempting to the avoid the dogs and pirates giving chase. And snapping his head once the occasional bit of gun fire slammed itself into a nearby tree.

"Shit! Shit! Shit!" The man managed to gasp out with tired breathes signifying the fatigue that was overtaking him. As he continued to run, he managed to spot one of the few huts scattered alongside the beach and shouted, "Help! They're trying to kill me! For god's sake somebody fuckin' open the door!"

"Over here!" His eyes opened wide upon seeing one of the nearby huts open their doors, "C'mon! You want to live right?" The man didn't even respond as he ran with whatever was left with his might towards the door, "Thank you, sir. I owe you my life."

The figure appeared in the door way before a small light erupted from his hand launching the man backwards forcing him towards the sand, "I see you don't like letting people finishing their sentences, "if you want to live, then you shouldn't be so trusting of strangers". Hasn't your mother taught you anything?" The figure stood above him and smiled. "Welcome to the Rook Islands. My kingdom and I'm afraid that your trespassing."

The pirates who had been chasing the man previously lined up behind their leader and surrounded the heavily bleeding man, who began coughing up blood. "But now your my guest. I suppose I can offer you a few things. What will it be food, water, a ticket home?"

The man continued to struggle and attempted to crawl away only before a sharp kick landed to his side. The pirates all aimed their guns at the man once more as the dogs growled. "I see your mom clearly has taught you sorry ass nothing. Here I am, offering some hospitality and you go off drag blood over my fuckin' kingdom."

The man flipped himself over looking at the crazed man that stood before him, this was Vaas Montenegro, and clearly from the smile and deranged look in his eyes. He was not in a good mood, if there ever was such a thing for a man filled with such ill intent. "You're fuckin' crazy."

"And there we go with the third strike. With a filthy mouth on a man whose too busy to even listen to the nice men that were chasing him. You know what, I'm done being Mr. Nice Guy." Vaas whistled over the dogs, "You know what to do, boys."

Screams got through the air as the dogs launched themselves upon his corpse, desperately trying to fight back and throwing sand in the face of the beasts. Clenching his hand into a fist which was a few inches from punching the animal before his hand exploded.

Vaas smiled as the man examined his stump and saw the smoking gun in his hand, "Its good to be king."

"Wanna know how I got these scars?"

The gagged, bound, and helpless men shook nervously as the purple-clad madman pulled out a knife. Licking his lips, the man casually popped the switchblade with a threatening click. As he ran a hand through his unkept, tangled hair, he grabbed the chin of one of the hostage and peered into his eyes.

What the man saw in his captor's pupils was an enigma; soulless yet filled with a crazy glow, and pure chaos masked by a calm, steady gaze.

"My brother...was a very naughty boy. Slept around with just anybody. Naturally he makes a few enemies. One of these enemies happens to be the local mob boss. Boss sends in his goons while the two of us are just hanging out."

"I try to stop them, but they pin me to the wall. One of them pulls out a knife, and sticks the blade in my mouth. "Calm down," he says. "We're just gonna talk, that's all. All good things, all good things." I just look at him, and he starts laughing. "What's the matter, buddy? Cat got your tongue?" He asks, and he then starts to...well.."

The man starts to cackle with glee, gesturing to his own face. Cupping his prisoner's face in his palm, he quickly stabs the switchblade into his cheek. Carving a rat's smile into his victim, the Joker straightens up and looks proudly at his handiwork. He then looks at the silent second hostage, who's eyes are a mix of unimaginable terror and an acceptance of a horrible death.

"What's the matter, buddy..." He asks, a sincere frown on his face. "Cat got your tongue?"

"You sure this is the right place?" A gangster asks, a shotgun slung casually over his shoulder. His companion, the helmsman of the boat Joker Gang, nodded.

"Of course I'm sure. You really think I'd risk get somethin' wrong with our boss?" He barked, before triumphantly pointing at the islands up ahead. "Ya see? The Rook Islands, clear as frickin' day!"

The pair grew silent as their boss exited his own personal cabin. His normally scrappy green hair was combed back, and he'd disregarded his heavy purple trench coat, leaving just his green vest and shirt on.

"We're here boys!" The Joker yelled gleefully, swinging his sawed-off Remington over his shoulder. As the boat slowly pulled into the dock, the Joker Gang saw a band of ten or so pirates waiting for them. As his men readied themselves downstairs, the Joker jumped off the boat and onto the deck.

"Let's go make some friends..."

The soft rumble of the jeep as it continued bounced along the rough roads covered in dirt and rocks. Upon reaching the compound, Vaas honked the horn altering the men inside to his presence. Several men rushed over to see their commander and a blanket is the back of the jeep, blotches of blood staining the cotton sheet.

The men inside rushed over and opened the door to the compound allowing for the jeep to enter and closing them once more. Vaas jumped off the vehicle as it slowed and noticed the significantly empty fort before grabbing one of the men meant to greet him.

"Tico, where is everybody?"

"Mr. Vaas, they're off dealing with the rebels. They seem to be getting more restless due to the American boy."

"Ah, Jason. I need to deal with him soon enough, can't have some white boy who thinks he's some fuckin' warrior because a couple of tree fucking rebels are impressed by his shooting." Vaas patted the man on the back, "Thanks for news. But please, get back to doing your job."

Vaas was about to retire to his room as another shout altered him on one of the watch towers. Climbing above, the sniper continued to have his eyes trailed on something as he handed over his commander a pair of binoculars. Scanning the horizon for a few moments before noticing a group of armed men, faces covered in masks, but that wasn't the most striking feature of the group, rather the man leading them was what caught Vaas' eye.

"What do we have here?" Vaas smiled in a sort of insane glee as the group continued their treks through the jungle, slowly moving their way around heading to who knows where. "You seeing this? The crazy looking motherfucker with the suit?"

"I have my eye on him, Vaas. Looks like he could be danger, should I take the shot?"

Vaas began contemplating the course of action in his head as he continued to view the group before lowering the binoculars. The clown looks like he could be dangerous, but am I really going to back out a challenge from someone who comes onto my turf and acts like he owns the place. No, I can't stand for that shit. The motherfucker needs to die screaming.

"Take out one of his men."

The sniper nodded and looked out once more before a pause and he lifted his head up once more, "The group is gone."

"Gone, what the fuck do you mean gone? You were looking at them just a fucking minute ago and now they're gone?"

The sniper nodded slowly and braced himself to face the true extent of his commander's anger when it never came. Instead the man just calmly asked to once again as he was heading towards the ladder and shouting for his men to gear up as they were on the look out for some clown.

Just then, an explosion ripped through the compound and consumed one of the watch towers causing the entire compound to stop what they were doing and rush towards the tower. Several bodies were thrown about area, charred and black when a voice came thundering out from the outside of the compound.

"Honey- I'm home."

The Joker: Purple Blue x9

Vaas: Red Green x9

Vaas unholstered his handgun and fired wildly into the smoke of the charred compound. He roared as his pirates soon joined him, a couple unloading their AK-47's into thin air. As his gun clicked empty, Vaas ordered his men to halt and wait. As everyone reloaded, the Joker Gang immediately stormed the compound through the hole in the wall they'd left.

"Now, that's hardly anyway to greet guests, isn't it?" The Joker yelled, before gleefully firing away with his Glock. Despite missing most of Vaas' men as well, one of his own thugs aimed his M1 Garand rifle and placed two shots into the chest of a close-by pirate. Green He reloaded his clip, only to see a nearby pirate aim his Smith and Wesson at him. He could only swing the rifle in his direction before the pirate shot a quarter-sized hole in his head. Blue

"I want these motherfuckers dealt with! Now!" Vaas screamed, holstering his Kimber and picking up a nearby MP-33. "Guard the drugs, and the guns, and put them in the dirt!" He ordered, gesturing for his men to fall back and secure their goods. The Joker whined, grabbing a Type 69 from his nearest thug.

"C'mon...just a little more play time..." He said, wildly shooting off the warhead and laughing as the recoil sent him back. The rocket veered far right, striking a nearby wall. The shrapnel and heat burned at the shoulder of a fleeing pirate, who crashed into the ground. He threw quickly turned over to spray away with his Agram, hitting a thug in the leg before dying. Green

"Aw, shit." The thug spatted as he went down to grip his leg and tried to return fire with his MAC-10 wildly to the horde of pirates catching the attention of Vaas. Who returned fire with his pistol hitting the man twice in his chest before going limp. Blue

"If you see any pussies like that, men! Put them out of their fucking misery, but leave the clown to me! No one messes with my shit and gets away with it! Not especially pussy ass white boys that think they're tough!" Vaas and his remaining men began fall back, heading deeper into the compound to defend their drug stash. The clowns being hot on their trail only getting interrupted by two men who stuck behind to delay the advance.

"Oh, looks like they left two of their friends behind to keep us busy. Well, let's not delay before we continue onto the main event." Joker gleefully launched himself towards the mayhem and flurry of rounds as his stuck behind and covered their boss. They understood the danger, but no one was brave or stupid enough to stop him as he left both a Remington and Glock and began firing wildly at both men.

"Is this motherfucker stupid?" One of the Pirates shouted to his companion before jumping out of his cover not waiting for a response. Firing in the direction of the man only to see that had vanished, "Where did he go?"

"Peek-a-boo!" As he jumped out of the small shed he hid behind and destroyed the pirates chest with a shotgun blast causing him to fly back. The other pirate turning his AK-103 in response to the Joker, only to be hit twice in the chest. He crumbled on the ground in pain, but tried dragging himself to the dropped rifle as he heard the man neared and the maniacally laughing booming against his ears. Green

"Now, now. Is that how you welcome your guests? By trying to end their fun before I've had my fill?" Joker's foot landed on the rifle before picking it up, "You see that just won't do." As the rest of the Joker's men came up behind him and aimed their weapons at the downed man. "You know what to do, boys."

A chorus of bullets emptied from their firearms before they continued onward. And onto the the huts and compound where Vaas and his remaining men went off to hide. Leaving the massacred bodies of the two pirates behind. Green

The Joker's victory was short-lived, as some of Vaas' other goons reemerged prepared to repel the attackers. One held an RPG-7, and sent the warhead towards the clowns. The blast veered off target at the last minute, missing the Joker but vaporizing the goon directly hit. Blue

"Get down, boss. We'll handle it!" A thug warned, gesturing for him to head off to a nearby shack. As the Joker and his bodyguard rushed inside for cover, they were met by two more pirates. Joker raised his Glock, emptying the magazine into a charging pirate. Green

His own thug quickly tried to swing the stock of his shotgun at his attacker, but missed. The pirate dodged underneath the attack, then thrust his KA-BAR deep into his stomach. As the clown struggled for breath, the pirate finished him off by thrusting it up into his chin. Blue

The Joker quickly drew his Extractor switchblade as the pirate prepared for another assault. As the battle raged on further outside the shack, the Joker smiled.

"This...this is gonna hurt you a lot more than it'll hurt me."

"Bring it, clown." The Pirate thrusted the KA-bar forward which was sidestepped and a fist connecting with his fast causing the Pirate to stumble back and knocked away his glasses. 

"Now, now. There's no need to call people names." Joker dodged another slash as he returned one of his own leaving a small cut on the Pirate's cheeks, exposing the flesh below and a trail of blood to begin leaking out. The Pirate roared in fury as he finally landed a hit on the Joker's chest, tearing past his shirt and leaving the cut. 

And with a chuckle, Joker pushed the man away and delivered a kick to the man's groin, "See, that wasn't very nice of me. But you didn't exactly respect me either. But just for fun, I'm going to give you a free chance to kill me. Come on, it'll be fun."

The Pirate hopped to his feet and launched at the man aiming for the heart, only to feel his hand blocked as Joker blocked the strike just short of his heart. Moving his switchblade, Joker thrusted the tool under the man's armpit, causing a scream and his knife to drop. Soon enough his screams were silenced as a hand covered his mouth and the knife was thrusted underneath his chin. The Joker looking into the man's eyes as the life drain from them. Green

The remaining clowns had continued to push towards the warehouse were Vaas and his remaining pirates had holed up, determined to make a stand and more importantly to defend their powerful grip on the islands. Loading up, the next RPG and lifting it over his shoulder, Vaas noticed two clowns hiding out in shed and beginning to steal weapons. 

His blood boiled as he saw those men with their greedy hands, arrogant laughs and cheap ass suits touched his stuff and tainted his kingdom, it just wouldn't do. "Adios, bozos." As the rocket soared through the air and ripped the shed apart launching bits of woods and shards of steel which in addition to leaving the horribly disfigured and blackened corpses of the clowns had enough force to launch one of the nearing goons into a cage that broke and impaled the man onto a spike. Leaving dangling for several moments before he went limp. Blue Blue Blue

"And that is what happens if you fuck with me, boys." Vaas smiled as he tossed aside the RPG-7 seeing no remaining warheads in the vicinity. Picking up the shotgun leaning on the building and pumping back the mechanism to ensure it was loaded. "Now then, why don't we show the door to the rest of our unwanted guests."

The two pirates nodded their heads and lifted a Agram and AK-103 respectively as they began to establish a small firing line towards the main entrance of the building. The air seemed to remain still for a moment as the wait began to end the invaders and protect what was rightfully theirs.

The Joker casually walked behind his men as they began the final assault, shotgun in hand. He heard a vicious roar as Vaas' fourth pirate, who'd been waiting to ambush the clowns, charged him with a machete. The Clown Prince of Crime swung his Remington in response, blasting apart his foe's kneecap. As the pirate fell, the Joker shoved the barrel of the shotgun into his face.

"I'd love to stay and chat, but I've got business with your boss. Excuse me." He taunted, before pulling the trigger. Green

As he glanced over to the warehouse, he saw one of his men's face shatter as a pirate shot a flurry of rifle rounds into his head. Blue "I swear, if want anything done..." He muttered, walking over to a side entrance of the warehouse.

The last Joker thug joined with his boss, clutching a rifle. "Boss, how're we gonna-" The thug was interupted as Joker blasted the lock of the entrance. He pumped the mechanism again, before shoving his way in.

As the very surprised Vaas and his crew tried to reassess the surprise attack, the Joker blasted a hole in the chest of a pirate while his henchmen placed a round in the other's neck. Green Green

Vaas pumped the action of his own shotgun, and aimed his last round. Reacting quickly, the Joker grabbed his own thug to protect him. Vaas made a solid hit, filling the thug with lead. Blue

Left alone, the Joker upholstered his Glock and abandoned the human shield for cover, as Vaas drew his own Kimber.

"Guess it's just you and me now." He laughed, causing Vaas to explode.

"I'M A KILL YOU FOR KILLING MY MEN, CLOWN!" He yelled back, firing at the Joker's cover.

"I think you like to forget that all we wanted was the drugs and guns. You and your men just happened to be collateral damage." The Joker responded and fired his Glock in kind. Sparks bursting from the cover as Vaas ran to avoid the hail of gunfire.

Vaas continued to return fire from his Kimber as he ran once stopping once as the Joker's Glock ran dry and allowing him to hit the clown's shoulder. The round ripping straight through and out the back causing a momentary stumble from the Joker as he finished reload.

"You shouldn't be wearing those fancy fuckin' clothes if you want to get down in the jungle. You won't have to worry soon enough though, when I'm through with you, the last thing on your mind will be a shitty purple jacket." Vaas spat out as fired two more times before running empty.

As he begun reloading, the warlord stopped as he heard the clown chuckle, getting louder and louder as the moments passed. Vaas' blood had begun to boil, 'ARE YOU LAUGHING ME, YOU SON OF BITCH!? ME! VAAS MONTENEGRO THE FUCKIN' KING OF THIS ISLAND?! WHAT THE FUCK IS SO FUNNY?"

Joker popped out his cover holding his switchblade and lifted both his arms up, "You're just so serious. Its just funny to watch you scream and shout. You have all this power and no time for fun, now that...," a huge grin formed across the man's face through the chuckles, "its just sad."

Vaas screamed and charged the man and tackled him onto a mound of drugs, knocking over mixed bags of cocaine, LSD, marijuana. Bits of the powder launching all over the floor as Vaas pulled out his machete intent on massacring the man. Only to few inches away his head as the Joker moved away and cut Vaas' side leaving a trail of blood that melted in with the white powder.

Flipping over his knife, Joker went for a stab only to feel the air escape from his body as Vaas returned his attack with a elbow to the gut before jumping up and attempting to deliver a blow across his chest, only to miss in his haste. His eyes staring the Joker with utter hatred as he tightened his grip on the machete. 

Both men began to circle each other tempting the other to make a move before Vaas charged once more and the clown prince once again dodged the attack and ended up behind the man and slashing once more, leaving a cut on his back. Vaas' machete trapped itself onto a large crate, leaving the weapon stuck and the warlord open for a new flurry of cuts, each more deeper and painful than the other. 

Vaas screamed as he ripped the machete out of the crate and spun himself around to deliver a slash across the Joker's chest, leaving a deep gash that began dripping blood. The Joker managed to dodge the second slash with a mere twirl and jumped back, giving the two distance once more.

"You going to keep laughing, funny man?" Vaas asked as he launched into another attack forcing the Joker on the defensive. "Because its only going to be going worse from here, you fuck!" And with a downward chop in his rage, aiming for the clown's face, a a look of pure sick pleasure caused the warlord to break out in grin as the machete made contact with flesh.

Once more a laugh broke out. Vaas stared his face still breaking out in a smile as he examined his machete, not embedded within the clown's head, but rather deep into the man's arm, the only thing having stopped the weapon from going straight through was the bone. The sickening crack of the bone was audible as Vaas found himself face to face with the clown prince.

"Now there's a big boy smile." The Joker grin only widened as he got closer to Vaas' face. Resting one of his hands on his face, "You know what they say about happy people?" Vaas felt his blood boil once more as bloody gloved hand held his face as if he was some sort of child, "They tend to live longer and sorry to upset you, but I've been alot happier than you."

And with that, the Joker dropped his switchblade into his other hand and stabbed Vaas' in the chest. In that moment of pain, the Joker wasted no time as he used his weight and began to run towards the sheet metal wall. Within seconds the the slam ripped through the warehouse as the knife sunk deeper into the warlord's chest.

Vaas' struggled for a few moments before his movements weakened as the Joker pulled out the switchblade and raised it to his face, "Since you aren't going to be alive much longer, how about a bed time story? So how about, you want to know how I got these scars?"

"How about I tell you one?" Vaas started as he ripped the machete still stuck in the Joker's arm and allowed the weapon to go clean straight through Joker's chest. "Have you ever heard the definition of insanity?"

The machete ripped out of the man's chest only to go in once more, The Joker's grip on Vaas' loosened as started up once more, "Its doing the same thing over and over and expecting shit to change. "Now. That. Is. Crazy." The Joker had let go of the warlord before a boot connected with him launching his form across the floor. The clown still having a bit of fight in him began to slowly lift himself up as Vaas neared once more.

"The first time someone told me that I thought they were shittin' me, so boom." Vaas motioned towards his head his hand making the shape of pistol. "The thing is he was right. I began to see all these crazy motherfuckers try to always fight me, resist my hold on this kingdom and just like that man they died. It happened over and over again."

The Joker took a swing once more, only for it to be more slowed as Vaas' deflected it and punched the man. "You won't kill me, Mr. Joker. Because you keep doing the same over and over and over again. And that's where our story ends."

The Joker dragged himself to a crate his breathing ragged and him bleeding profusely, "I suppose that was a fun story to here. Well, atleast I did manage to bring some sunshine to your life." His grin ripped through his face once more as Vaas stood above him to finish the job. "Just one more for the road."

Once more the laugh ripped through the warehouse, it was more ragged and pained, but in there was still the hint of the madman behind it. Laughing his last moments away before the machete slammed into his heart and the laughing had begun to stop. The Clown Prince of Gotham had died. Purple

Vaas had made his way out of the warehouse clutching his wound as a group of Pirates had arrived on the scene. They saw their leader, bloodied and bodies scattered around the complex.

"Vaas, what happened here?" one of them dared to ask.

"Just had a couple of friends over." The warlord smiled as he continued to walk towards the group, "Say, do any of you know how to give stiches?"

Expert's Opinion[]

While the Joker's insanely ingeius plans made him a dangerous mental foe, he found a match in the equally insane and brutal Vaas. Without one of his greatest strengths, Joker was easily put down by the superior hardware of Vaas and his pirates.

To see the original battle, weapons, and votes, click here.

Battle vs. Tony Montana (by Thats random 369)[]

Tony: 12345

Joker: 12345

Tony Montana and his friend Manny are looking over their empire while being guarded by 3 henchmen, 1 with an uzi, 2 with M16's. Suddenly they hear a noise, one of the guards with an m16 goes over to a window to see whats going on. As he looks out the window he sees The Joker and four goons (one with a duffle bag) breaking into the Montana mansion. The guard aims his M16 at the duffle bag and fires into the clowns head.

Joker: 1234

The joker grabs the duffle bag and runs into the mansion. Tony and his goons go to kill them off. When they get there they see only one clown, he is standing near a statue. Tony cocks the M203 and fires at the bottom of the statue causing it to fall on the goon, killing him instantly.

Joker: 123

Meanwhile, the joker hears the drug-smugglers coming and hides in a closet. As the first one passes, he is instantly mowed down by M67 bullets.

Tony: 1234

Tony kicks open the closet, just to see a joker playing card and the joker's M67 on the ground. He looks up to see the vent open. Tony then yells out, "Come out of there you f***ing coward, I'll f***ing kill you, you and your little friends are dead!". Meanwhile, a druggie with an M16 who decided to go ahead of the group is walkin near a staircase. Just behind him, the vent opens and the joker climbs out with the duffle bag. He quietly walks up behind him and taps him on the shoulder. When he turns around the Joker slashes his throat. The joker the throws the goon down the stairs and shoots the body eight times with his glock 17 to make sure he's dead.

Tony: 123

The joker than opens the duffle bag and pulls out a type 69. He then goes down the stairs to find more drug-dealers to kill. Meanwhile Tony, Manny and the last drug-dealer decide to split up. The goon heads to a balcony, he sees a clown and aims his uzi, but before he can pull the trigger he is blown to smitherines by the joker and his type 69.

Tony: 12

Meanwhile, Manny is walking threw the main hallway and looking in rooms as he does once he gets to the end of the hallway he kicks open the door to the master bedroom and sees a clown planting explosives every where fires screams and shoots of all the shots from his uzi. 5 hitting the clown but some hitting the explosives blowing him to smitherines.

Tony: 1

Joker: 12

Meanwhile, Tony is walking in the highest floor of the mansion. As hes walking through the hallway and sees a clown he is about to shoot the clown, but the clown is shot in the head by an unseen figure.

Joker: 1

Tony lowers his weapon, thinking the man to be Manny but once Tony gets close enough the figure (revealing the figure to be the joker.) punches Tony in the face. He then sticks the blade in Tony's mouth. He then asks Tony "Do you want to know how I got these scars?" Tony then replies "This is how you'll get more!" he then stabs the Joker with his stiletto.


Tony then raises his stiletto and yells "The world is mine!"

Winner: Tony Montana

Expert's Opinion[]

Tony won because he had the training and the weapons. And while the Joker is a great warrior he would kill his own men and was just no match for Tony.

To see the original battle, weapons, and votes, click here.

Battle vs. Joker (Burtonverse) (by Thundrtri)[]

No battle was written.


Expert's Opinion[]

The Nolanverse Joker won primarily due to packing a whole lot more firearms, newer and faster to reload firearms, and explosive launchers. The Burtonverse had some nice tricks, but the Nolanverse was able to see them coming due to being just as insane yet smart. The Nolanverse was also much more ruthless, pretty good when it came to tactics due to his lack of caring, and he could easily hold his own in a fight. The Burtonverse put up a great fight, but in the end the Nolanverse came out on top thanks to more modern tech, greater intelligence, and greater brutality.

To see the original battle, weapons, and votes, click here.

Battle vs. Helen Cutter (by Wassboss)[]

The joker is sitting in an abandoned factory plotting his next evil plan. Up above him hiding in the rafters is Helen cutter who is watching his every move. She has heard of this man and has decided to eliminate him before he can pose a threat to her “science”. She aims her pistol at him and fires.

However the bullet only scrapes the joker’s cheek. He looks up and sees Helen standing fully exposed in the rafters. She fires another shot but he ducks out of the way and, pulling out his Remington 870, fires back. He also misses but hits the rafter she is standing on causing her to lose her footing and fall. Fortunately she lands on her feet and is unharmed.

The joker tries to shoot her again but she dodges the bullet. She fires 3 shots from her pistol before jumping inside an office therefore putting her safely behind cover. The joker easily dodges the bullets and throws a grenade into the office. Helen jumps out just before it detonates and fires another shot hitting the joker in the leg.

The joker shrugs it off and fires his shotgun knocking the pistol out of Helen’s hand. The joker points his gun at Helen. “Looks like I won” he says smiling wickedly. Helen just starts laughing manically. The joker flinches a bit but keeps his gun pointed at Helen's head. “What are you laughing about”. Helen stops laughing but a big grin spreads across her face. “Look up”

The joker looks up and sees a beast hanging off the rafters looking in his direction. “Have fun” Helen says and runs off. The joker fires his gun but she is already gone. The future predator jumps down from the rafters and lands on the joker. It snarls at him and tries to bite him. The joker hits it in the face with the butt of the shotgun stunning it for a moment. He then flips it back around and shots the predator at point blank range killing it instantly.

The joker brushes the dirt off his suit and walks off thinking that Helen has gone. Little does he know she is hiding behind some crates knife in hand. With a yell she jumps over them and thrusts the knife at the joker. However he expertly blocks with his own knife. He stabs forward himself and stabs Helen in the stomach. He pulls it out and smiles as Helen clutches her stomach and faints.

Two hours later..

Helen wakes up tied to a table in a lab. She looks around and sees the joker mixing chemicals. “Where am I” says Helen trying to break free of her restraints. “Don’t try and escape” says the joker turning around with a canister in his hand. “Now enough talk” he says taping her mouth shut. “I have been working on a new weapon I hope will make a person’s head explode” he says smiling “And you’re my test subject”.

Expert's Opinion[]

The joker won because his better weapons coupled with his insanity helped him overcome Helen.

To see the original battle, weapons, and votes, click here.

Battle vs. Penguin (by Wassboss)[]

No battle was written.

Expert's Opinoin[]


To see the original battle, weapons and votes, click here.

Battle vs. Kano (Alternate) (By MilenHD)[]

Kano: Black Black Black Black Black

The Joker: Blue Blue Blue Blue Blue

Gotham City

Near a bank in Gotham city the Joker and his gang had stop their bus, and the Joker holding his Remington 870 kicked the door and shouted-"Don't you dare move, this is robbery."  and as he turned he saw that someone had come before them.

A banker was been hold in Kano's grasp, but the Australian dropped him after he heard the voice and he stood up with a frown on his right eye and spoke-"I am sorry, but you arrived way too late mate." and the Joker pointing his shotgun toward Kano spoke without losing his cool-"What about fifty/fifty? We both get something."

"Oh I am going to give you fifty/fifty, after I gut you up, mate."-said Kano with anger and charged his bionic eye, but only managed to knock the Joker's shotgun off his hands. Than both groups open fired at each other, the Joker's gang retreats toward the streets and one of them decided to hide in the bus with his automatic Glock, until a Black Dragon thug fired his RPG-7 blowing the bus and the thief within it.Blue

"Alright now, chase them and hunt them down boys."- Kano said to his thugs while spreading into two groups, and as Kano was with 2 other thugs looking around for the Joker and his thugs, but in mere seconds a Black Dragon got killed by a Glock pistol.Black As the thug tried to fire another round Kano threw his butterfly sword and pierced the thug's stomach, than he blew his brains with his bionic eye.Blue

As Kano and his thug proceeded forward into searching the Joker, they found a the Joker and his remaining thieves killing a Black Dragon thug with a shotgun to the head.Black And the other one was firing toward the Joker and his thief, one of the Joker's thieves got shoot from behind from the CZ-75 of the Black Dragon clan.Blue Kano fired his bionic eye missing the Joker, and the Black Dragons all gathered near at the end of the street, but the Joker fired his Norinco Type 69, killing both Black DragonsBlack Black, but Kano still narrowly escaped by rolling away.

As Kano got up he fired his bionic eye, knocking the Norinco away from the Joker's hands and as he was charging at the Joker who was trying to reload the shotgun at least, Kano got the OFT knife stabbed into his back by the last clown thug. Kano shrugged it off and toss the thug toward the Joker, as the thug was yelling, both he and his boss collided. The Joker rose up and as he was trying get him up, he spoke to him-"Stop lying like an infant and start being useful!", before the Australian come and tore the thugs head off Blue, than punching the Joker with so much strength, he collapsed. As Kano approached the unarmed Clown Prince of Crime, he kicked him in the guts and as he stabbed him in the back, cutting his spine, he whispered in his ear-"I told you I was going to give you fifty/fifty, after I gut you up nicely" and stabbed him few more times, killing him.Blue

As Kano arose, he grabbed his wokie tokie and spoke-"Heya Jarek, would you mind to come with the helicopter to Gotham and take me, since I got into bit o' trouble."

"Fine, just wait me somewhere, where the Special Forces can't capture you"-Jarek responded to Kano. "You ain't gonna worry about me"- Kano responded, and he calmly lit a cigar and sat at the top of a pushed trash can to smoke in victory.

Expert's Opinion[]

Kano was more experienced, had better weapons and he faced deadlier opponents such as cyborgs, ninjas and demons. Also the Joker's gang isn't as loyal, as the Black Dragon clan of Kano.

To see the original battle, weapons and votes, click here.

Battle vs. Comedian (by Sith Venator)[]

No battle was written.

Winner: The Comedian

Expert's Opinion[]


To see the original battle, weapons and votes, click here.

Battle vs. Joker (DCEU) (by Elgb333)[]

It was almost midnight in the docks overlooking Gotham Bay, as several mob dealers can be seen transferring their precious merchandise into a warehouse. These criminals brought their cargoes ranging from guns, drugs, to even exotic animals and young women, basically everything illegal from different parts of the world, and now converging here in Gotham City, USA. The leader of the gangsters, the infamous terrorist Joker Ledger, monitors his business behind a window in his office.

Joker Ledger has no time for sleep and vacation tonight, since business as they say, never sleeps nor rest. Watching his men as they hurriedly load up their cargo in fear that he might become impatient and goes psychotic, the agent of chaos and now unchallenged owner of Gotham City, reminisce nights like these which used to offer him a challenge. Ever since he found the results of that social experiment, drove Harvey Dent mad and defeated the Batman once and for all, he’s taken control of the city and now feels bored. The dog it seems, has finally chased down that car, and not knowing what to do, misses the days when the night offered actual knights for him to battle.

It doesn’t also help that last night, he had a dream in which a grotesque midget-like abomination with a big head appeared above his bed saying, “Now what to do… what to do… That Batman Beyond vs The GODDAMN Batman was awesomz! I need something to top it off... something more spectacular! Oh wait! Hey there Heath – I mean the Joker! I’m Batmite by the way, and man oh man have you given me one hell of an idea for my next fight. Wait there okay. You’re going to earn your next Oscar win!”

A crazy dream... even too crazy for the Joker Ledger himself. Having no appetite for sleep since last night, the Joker Ledger decided to rather stay awake and check his business tonight instead. But as he was watching his gang, one of his men knocked on his door, went inside and said, “Sorry to barge in boss, but we found this package in one of yo' trucks. We don’t know what it is but it’s light and…”

Joker Ledger suddenly turns around, looks at the man with serious eyes, and approaches him while clicking on his switchblade. The man, panicking, kept thinking as the Joker was approaching him, what the hell did he do wrong and what the Joker's going to do to him. Sweating, nervous and ready to piss himself, the gangster prayed for his life as the mad psycho comes closer towards him. As the knife was almost near his body, the Joker Ledger suddenly grabs his hand holding the package and stabs his knife on the box. The man almost screamed as he thought that his palm got kebabed by the knife, but Joker Ledger shows him that his hand was fine and that the knife didn’t went through almost. As the man breathed heavily, the Joker smiles and said, “I hired killers of men, not cowards who’re scared easy from a little knife.”

He slices open the package, and what the gangster saw inside completely creeped him out. Inside were dozens of wet, moist and stinking used condoms, mixed in with some Joker playing cards.

With his smile turning upside down, Joker slowly looks at the nervous man and asked gently, “Okay… who’s the funny guy who sent me this?”

Suddenly, a huge explosion rocks the warehouse; destroying the doors and creating a huge hole. Bullets then came flying from what used to be the entrance and the whole place was soon engulfed in fire. Joker Ledger managed to duck, narrowly avoiding the hailstorm of bullets, but the man holding the package disintegrated into a heap of red smoke and chili from the lead that were flying everywhere.Purple The rest of Joker Ledger’s men either went down the floor or took cover behind the crates to avoid being hit.

Men wearing lavish costumes and props then came in swarming with guns blazing. Many of them were dressed in some creepy weird fetish costumes or nutty cosplays, like giant eyeballs or a goat for a head. After they entered, another clown came waltzing into the warehouse, catching the attention of Joker Ledger.

“What do we have here?” Joker Leto said as he appeared in all his bling and glory, before putting his hand with the smiling lips tattoo on his mouth and laughing “Nyeeeaaarh! Heh! Heh! Heh! Heeeeeeehhhhh….”

Joker Ledger: PurplePurplePurplePurplePurplePurple

Joker Leto: GreenGreenGreenGreenGreenGreenGreen

The Joker Ledger and his men, though confused by the sudden appearance of these weirdos, nonetheless opened fire on them. The Joker with his Glock scored a direct hit on one of the men who was wearing a huge eyeball for a head, bursting that head like a smashed lightbulb.Green

Several of the Joker Ledger gangs, now sporting their iconic clown masks, grabbed more powerful weapons from the crates and continued firing. One of Joker Leto’s hired gun, who was stumbling around inside a frigging panda costume, offered a large target for them to shoot at with their submachine guns.Green

“What the hell do you people want? We don’t got no beef with you!” One of the Joker Ledger gang member said.

“You don’t want no beeeeeeef?” Joker Leto replied. “You don’t want no beef? You don’t want no beef? Oh I’m not here because of beef. Some midget came to me and told me everything. There’s only one room for a clown in this town, and you my scarred friend… is not the Joker who can clown around my Gotham.”

Joker Ledger smirks, “Oh great, I’m so thrilled.”

“Get my men some cover Mr. Frost,” Joker Leto said to his second in command. Some of the intruders started unleashing their military-grade weapons like H&Ks and AKs and started shooting back at the Joker Ledger Gang. The sheer power and range from these guns punctured through their covers and pounded some of them like game, hitting one in the chest, killing him. Purple Joker Leto just laughs as the carnage intensifies, shooting his gun all around like a crazy maniac.

Joker Ledger kept calm and crawled on the floor to get a better position, while simultaneously firing back at his enemies. His gang is now being overwhelmed, and one of Joker Leto’s man who’s wearing a silly Batman face mask climbs on top of some crates and takes potshots at Joker Ledger’s gangsters below, hitting one in the head and spraying his gray matter on a wall.Purple One of them, realizing that the fight ain’t that worth it, started to bail on Joker Ledger, but the men under Joker Leto didn’t cared and just shot him in the back anyways.Purple

As his remaining men tried to hold ground, Joker Ledger positions himself behind a huge crate. He grabs an M67 frag grenade, takes out the pin and throws it at Joker Leto’s gang. The guy wearing the funny Batman mask got his legs instantly blown from under him,Green and the explosion distracted the rest of Joker Let’s gang long enough for Joker Ledger’s Gang to push forward.

As the Joker Ledger gets up to join his men as they counter-attacked, one of Joker Leto’s henchman wearing a goat mask appeared from the side and opened fire with his machine gun, making a creepy goat sound as he does so. But Joker Ledger luckily dodges the bullets before rushing at the man with the metal pipe. He first hits the guy in the leg, shattering his shin and putting the guy down crying in pain. Joker Ledger then continues to bash the guy in the head with the pipe, laughing “Woh- Hahaha Wohahaha HAHAHAHAHA” in glee until the guy’s skull was completely crushed.Green

Joker Leto himself hits a bullseye with his pistol after shooting one of Joker Ledger’s gangsters in the eye.Purple Having had enough and now running out of henchmen, Joker Ledger takes what remained of his gang to another corner of the warehouse filled with more weapons. As they retreated, one of his men unluckily got cut in half from machine gun fire courtesy of one of Joker Leto’s men.Purple

Afterwards, Joker Leto and his men regrouped. He ordered them to scout the rest of the place to look for the other Joker, when suddenly an RPG rocket came out of nowhere and hits one poor bastard dressed up like a Daft Punk reject, blowing him up to bits.Green The explosion threw Joker Leto and Mr. Frost like ragdolls to the floor. Joker Ledger was the one who fired that shot and he and his henchman quickly followed by trying to empty the magazine of their machine guns at them.

As bullets flew dangerously close, Mr. Frost grabs the moaning Joker Leto and carries him outside. “Hurry Mr. Frost,” Joker Leto murmured while still disoriented. “I can’t wait to show this hunka hunka my toys…”

As Joker Ledger and his came in pursuit, Joker yells at them, “And where do you think you’re going? You’re gonna miss more of the fireworks” as he fires another rocket at them but misses.

Arriving outside the docks, Joker Ledger and his men stop and continue their chase in the streets. They slowed down and looked around, but kept themselves ready just in case that psycho shows himself. As they kept searching, Joker Ledger’s last henchman knows that if this guy has the balls to call himself a Joker as well, he’s got to be as psychotic and unpredictable as his boss.

And what he thought of was right. While they were prepared for whatever that psycho might throw at them, Joker Ledger and his henchman couldn't have been prepared for a large helicopter which suddenly appeared in the sky and started hovering towards them. The back door of the chopper opened and there they saw Mr. Frost driving the crate, and Joker Leto laughing and shooting at them with his golden-plated assault rifle.

Joker Ledger and the goon quickly bolted to the opposite direction as Joker Leto continued laughing and firing wildly at them. As they were running, Joker Ledger took a burst of rifle fire in his leg, badly mauling it and putting him down helpless on the floor. His henchman tried to help him up as the chopper was gaining on them, but Joker Ledger pushed him away and said, “Don’t mind me. Take out this sucker!” before handing the man a cable launcher. The gangster silently nods and runs towards the nearest building he can find.

As Joker Leto’s chopper approaches him, Joker Ledger uses his submachine gun to stand up while accidentally firing off some bullets, before aiming at the helicopter. His bullets proved useless as the chopper still kept on coming and Joker Leto still keeping it weird with his assault rifle. Joker Ledger then throws his submachine gun away, stood his ground, and focuses his eye on the chopper, while saying, “Come on, come on. Hit me. HIT ME!”

“Hah-hah-hah-heeeeeee…” Joker Leto said as he laughs loudly while stretching his face and spinning his head. He continues firing his assault rifle at Joker Ledger, who didn’t mind the bullets whizzing around him. The chopper kept going towards him, even though the street was too narrow and the chopper was getting sandwiched in between two huge apartment buildings.

"Sir we're awfully getting close to the street. It's getting too dangerous we have to fall back!" Mr. Frost warned Joker Leto.

But Joker Leto just kept on firing his assault rifle like a loon and yelled at Mr. Frost, "Don't you dare stop FROST! Keep on em! Keep on em! Like a mad bull in Chinatown just KEEP ON EM!"

“RACK HIM UP! Rack him up, rack him up, rack him up,” Joker suddenly yelled. In one the buildings, his remaining goon fires a grappling cable that attaches to the wall of the opposite building next to it. The attack helicopter hits the cable and slightly loses its balance. Its blades however, shredded the concrete buildings, before the rotor finally blew up and sent the chopper plummeting to the street. The falling chopper almost hits Joker Ledger as it plummeted, abut he just stood there unflinching and watched as it crashed behind him.

The once intimidating attack helicopter was now just a pile of burning metal and smoke as Joker and his henchman approached it. Mr, Frost, the driver of the damn thing, was badly ripped apart and what remained of his corpse was now burning.Green Joker Ledger signaled his henchman to go in and recon the area.

While they were looking inside the crash site, they saw a badly wounded Joker Leto crawling and trying desperately to get back on his feet, coughing up blood but still giggling in a low voice. “Well well well,” Joker Ledger gloated as they slowly approach the wounded man.

“Oh you’re not gonna kill me,” Joker Leto said as he finally gets up. "But after this, I am gonna hurt ya'... really, really, bad." And before they can pull the trigger of their guns, Joker Leto drops a smoking flashbang grenade that rolls towards their feet, before exploding and blinding them. Joker Ledger fell on his feet scratching his eyes and cursing in pain, while his henchman cried as hot tears flowed from his eyes. A shot rang out and hits the henchman right between the eyes; the shot coming from Joker Leto’s pistol.Purple

Hearing the loud bang, Joker Ledger quickly moves into cover and readies himself. Both men were severely injured: Joker Ledger has a badly wounded leg and painfully sore eyes, and Joker Leto has a few bones broken, torn flesh and burned skin from the crash he just survived. Even so, these men were still determined to keep on going, to keep on killing, and prove who deserves to be the real Joker. Only pride and a ton of insanity were keeping these men alive and ready to battle, while also keeping big smiles on their faces.

Joker Ledger attacks first, firing his machine pistol at Joker Leto but the latter manage to duck behind the burning framework of the chopper. Joker Leto fires off a few rounds of his own, but the Glock kept him pin down and outgunned.

“So what makes you think you can be me? Hmmm?” Joker Ledger said as he loads a new clip.

“For a lot of reasons,” Joker Leto said. “I’m a crazy clown but I also have a crazy-ass girlfriend. Do you have a girlfriend, freak?”

“I’m not…” Joker Ledger said as he continues firing bullets at Joker Leto. Unbeknownst to him, Joker Leto had already snuck away from his cover and was already behind him. He approaches Joker Ledger from behind, but the latter managed to sense his presence and turns around to shoot him. Joker Leto however was too quick and disarms Joker Ledger, before slapping him in the face Robin-style. The force of that slap almost knocked Joker Ledger out as his body fell on the ground.

Joker Leto aims his Colt at Joker Ledger’s head, tired and panting from all the fighting. “Change of plans, I ain't gonna hurt you no more. I’ll just gonna kill you right away.”

“Now we talking,” Joker Ledger said still kneeling on the ground smiling. But as Joker Leto was already going to pull the trigger, Joker Ledger suddenly stabs him in the gut with a broken piece of glass from the chopper. Joker Leto yells in pain but Joker Ledger soon followed by stabbing him in the left lung, before pulling him down by the trousers and pushing him to the ground. As he kneels on Joker Leto below him, he puts that glass shard firmly on his mouth.

As Joker Leto struggles, Joker ledger shushes him like a child before saying in a gently voice,” You wanna know how I got these scars?”

Joker Leto continues to struggle, desperately trying to get away from Joker Ledger’s grasp. Joker Ledger looks at him for a sec, looks at the burning cinder they were at, before looking back at Joker Leto and saying “You won’t gonna believe me but it was a tiny little bat who did this. But it seems that we don’t have time for that, though I will let you know how you got these...”

And after he said those words he then slashes Joker Leto’s cheeks slowly and painfully as blood spurted on both their face. Joker Ledger then releases him from his grasp and allows him to scream in pain as his jaws started to rip away from themselves, creating a large bloody Glasgow grin.

Joker Ledger then stood up and towers on the defeated Joker Leto, laughing maniacally as he watches Joker Leto bleed and burn to death.Green With a smile like that, Joker Ledger thought humorously, the freak now at least looks the part.

Expert’s Opinion[]

It was very tough deciding who’s going to win since both were neck to neck in the comments. In the end, the majority of experts believed that while Joker Leto has the advantage of military graded weaponry, they were not suited for his psychotic and impulsive ways. Joker Ledger’s weapons on the other hand had more rate of fire that worked perfectly with his twisted mind.

Another reason why the experts chose Joker Ledger is because he’s smarter, more cunning and can create better plans that allows him to triumph over Joker Leto’s impulsive and reckless fighting style.

To see the original battle, weapons, and votes, click here.

Battle vs. Balalaika (By Battlefan237)[]

Balalaika : RedGreenBlackBlackBlackBlackBlackBlack

Joker :PurpleBlueBlueBlueBlueBlueBlueBlue

Gotham Harbor

As the ferry approached the Gotham Harbor, Balalaika gazed out of the window, staring at the city's spectacular skyline. Though impressed by the sheer number of skyscrapers, she found it hard to appreciate the view as she recalled the city's notorious past: Scarecrow, Two-face, Zsasz, Ra's Al Ghul......Each of these names and their marauding acts had made the city infamous all over the globe. Even the shithole of Roanupur seemed kind of nice when compared to this town.

"So what's the deal ?" She turned to her right-hand man Boris who'd been sitting in silence for a while, watching him unfolded a piece of document.

"Our source have found out the hiding turf of that clown. The headquarter expects us to settle the job down before GCPD intervenes." Said Boris.

"We'll settle it quick. But tell the soldiers not to underestimate our target. Remember it was this clown that single handedly took apart our branch here." Added Balalaika,"We mustn't lose anyone."


The Joker's garage

"It's high time we robbed another bank !" Shouted the Joker, as he reeled off a long string of maniacal laughter. With his thugs scattered around the building, busy reloading getting ready their weapons and counting the money they had previously "earned" , the clown prince of crime could foresee that his new public prank will certainly keep everyone in the police department on edge and once again mess up the caped crusader's agenda.

Suddenly, the garage door rose up and in came three soldiers armed with AK-47 and Mac-10. Almost immediately they started spraying around the hall, ruining the Joker's perfect plan. Hardly had the two thugs in the center of the hall picked up their firearms before they got slaughtered in the midst of bullet rainBlueBlue.

"Oops, troubles." Said the clown as he ducked behind a metal chunk and signaled the thugs upstairs to shoot the intruders from above and steadied his M1, hastily firing back with his Glock.

Two M76 sub machine guns poked out of the platform above, spraying down a Russian with Mac-10Black. Shocked and angered, another Russian stood up and raised his AK to fire at the platform, only go expose himself and get a shot in his chest from the Joker's carefully-aimed M1 GarandBlack.Losing all of the teammates, the last soldier retreated out of the garage, as she quickly darted out, the Joker noticed her long hair and realized the soldier was a woman, probably in her 40s or early 50s.

With another glance at the gears of the dead soldiers, the Joker found them decently armed compared to the mobs around. Feeling odd, the Joker still ordered his men to pursue. As soon as the first thug rushed out of the garage, machine gun bullet rained down from the ex-Soviet military jeep parked right next to the door, turning the thug into a literal mess of blood and fleshBlue.

The Joker and his thug immediately darted back."Big bomb ready, boy !" Shouted the Joker, towards the thug on the roof with Type-69. As the Joker climbed up the platform to join with the thug and enjoy the upcoming show of fireworks, the noise from the backdoor section drew his attention.

Back when the Joker and most of his men were dealing with the sudden intruders, Boris and one Russian soldier broke into the garage from a window hidden at the corner and took down a thug nearby Blue. As they searched around the corridor, the Joker burst out from a paper advertisement board with logo of Wayne enterprise printed on one side and shot the Russian soldier in the back with the last round of his GlockBlack, while another clown-masked thug jumped down from the platform, S&W in hand. Boris immediately responded by shooting the thug in the chest with his Stechkin before he could steady himself from the jumpBlue. Then he turned to the Joker, only to find him next to the light switch.

The room darkened for a few seconds after the Clown pulled the switch. As Boris blindly shot around the corridor, a huge pain was injected on his arm, causing him to drop the pistol. The light went on once again, revealing the Joker holding a metal tube, with night-vision device on his face. The clown jumped toward him in attempt to launch another smash, but Boris drew out his NR-40 and stabbed him on the arm, disarming the Joker. The clown dodged back clumsily, only to receive a kick in the chest and an elbow on the heart. Boris went on to punch the clown in the face, completely messing up the Joker's fancy makeup and sending him to the ground. "Ouch, that hurts." Said the Joker as he coughed out dirt and blood, but still retaining his signature grim. "Shut up." With another kick to the jaws delivered, Boris caught the Joker by the neck, pinning him on the ground and using his knees to restrict the clown's arms. All actions accomplished in high efficiency, inherited from USSR's harsh training.

"Time to die,clown." Said Boris, as he rose his knife in his usual emotionless expression, readying for a final stab.

"Nope, nope, not yet. I gotta show you something, something really interesting ." Said the clown,"Bombs out !"

A huge explosion followed the clown's words, as the rooftop thug fired his Type-69 after getting the clown's signal. Balalaika and the other Russian soldier sitting on the backseat noticed the thug raising his weapon before launching, allowing them to dodge out of the car immediately. The Russian on the machine gun, however, wasn't that lucky. Although he also discarded the car in time, he failed to keep a discrete distance with the exploding car before his back being penetrated by a fragment of the jeepBlack.

With the whole building quivered by the explosion ,Boris paused his knife and looked back the the window that had been torn into pieces by the shock wave, worrying about the safety of hies captain and other team mates. Due to distraction, Boris's leg let loose of the clown for a second, allowing him to quickly reach for his pocket and dig out a dagger, slashing Boris in the leg. "Arrrrrr!" Boris roared in pain as he turned back in haste, trying to stab back, only to receive another stab on the arm.

The Joker lifted himself up and banged Boris's head with his, sending Boris into dizziness. Then he poked his dagger into Boris's exposed neck, which was a fatal strike, causing blood to come seeping out of the large crack on Boris's neck. The clown laughed maniacally as he watched Boris dropping his knife on the floor and collapsed. With an additional punch, the Joker managed to get up and kicked Boris aside. "BWAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAH !" Went the Joker, as he rejoiced over the agony of the ex-Spetsnaz militant on the floor.

Boris, with his mind fading out, managed to coughed out a last word :"капитан (Captain)......"Green

"Who knows what that means, ha !" Joked the clown, as he bend down and began carving Glasgow Smile on Boris's face.

Meanwhile, the rooftop thug, obviously pleased by the power of his Type-69, poked his head out to check the result.Before he could focus on the remnants of the jeep, something fast and sharp pierced his forehead, ending his criminal careerBlue.

When the Joker finished his grotesque job and went up to the roof, he noticed the thug's dead body with the discharged Type-69 displayed nearby by peeing through the half-open door.Knowing that someone must have landed on or climbed up the roof, the clown quickly darted back and headed to the backdoor in an attempt to escape.On his way to the exit, he didn't forget to pick up a pistol left on the floor to defend himself.

Seconds later the clowned reached the spot where his thugs had parked the school bus. When he was about to make his dash toward the bus door, something shocking caught his attention---The masked bus driver's lifeless corpse was leaning over the steering wheel, with the front glass riddled with bullet holesBlue. Knowing that he had been surrounded by enemies all the way, the clown prince sighed and took cover behind the bus and prepared himself for upcoming foes.

As predicted, Balalaika and a Russian hitman emerged from the alley nearby, each of them AK in hand. "I've just spotted him, how come...?" Said the hitman,cautiously pointing his AK-47 around, in search of the Joker. Suddenly something tumbled out from the back of the bus, the Russian immediately opened fire, only to find out he'd been shooting at a tin of pencils. "What's the hell ?" Thought the man, as he paused for a second, which gave the Joker the chance to jumped down from the bumper and shoot at the two attackers from the bottom of the bus.

The clown shot out all the rounds at high speed and high accuracy compared to his normal standard, shooting the leading Russian five timesBlack and sliced Balalaika by the shoulder, causing her to discard her rifle and swiftly dodge back. Taking this as an opportunity, the clown advanced towards Balalaika and picked up her rifle. As he reached the spot and found Balalaika unarmed, the Joker chuckled.

"Wow, your face is even more messed up than my friend Harvey's." Said the clown, as he lifted the rifle,"It's time for me to put a smile on it."

Balalaika simply stared back at the clown, not even making an attempt to back off or fight back, with lights of boredom gleamed within her pupils.

The exact moment the clown's hand reached the trigger part, a bullet came from the sky behind, blowing up half of his head.

Almost instantly the clown prince of crime crumbled down,tossing the rifle aside, eventually forming a kneeling posture with his knees placed on the ground and his head crashed open. Liquid consisted of blood, make-ups, and brain matter filled with the clown's sick ideas flowed out and covering the concrete ground aroundPurple.This time, the Joker was finally unable to laugh.

Balalaika lit up a cigar as she signaled the sniper on the top of the building behind to get down and began to organize a plan to leave this city as fast as possible.

Winner: Balalaika

Expert's Opinions[]

While both warriors are smart in their own ways, it was Balalaika and her subordinates' superior training, experience as well as better firearms ensured their victory. On the other hand, the Joker hired low-level thugs, used inferior firearms and his limited experience let him underestimate his enemies as normal mobs, hence preventing him from realizing the fact that the rooftop attacks were jobs done by military-grade  snipers rather than thugs climbing up the roof, causing the clown's final demise.

See the original stuff, press here.

Edit Section

Battles here were deemed to be unfair or otherwise not in accordance with wiki standards, and have been removed from the statuses of the warriors and displayed below.

Battle vs. Michael Corleone (by Samurai234)[]

Joker: Darkred Darkred Darkred Darkred Darkred

Corleone: Grey Grey Grey Grey Grey

In an abandoned hotel, the Joker is telling his thugs a plan; they will plant M67 grenades over different parts of Gotham City, then blow them up. They store the grenades in a duffel bag, and prepare to leave. Meanwhile, a car being driven by Michael Corleone's gang (consisting of Michael himself and Sonny Corleonre, Fredo Corleonre, Peter Clemenza, and Salvatore Tessio) pulls up next to the hotel. The five gangsters then exit the car and enter the hotel. As the five Corleone family members enter the lobby, they hear a "ding" noise. They turn and see the Joker and his thugs exiting from a elevator. The two teams run into each other and wait for each other to make a move. Fredo pulls out a Molotov Cocktail while Michael lights it. One of the Joker's thugs quickly spots it, though, and yells, "Boss! They're lighting a bomb!". He then quickly pulls out a Glock pistol and shoots the Molotov, injuring Fredo. Quickly, The Joker pulls out his Smith and Wesson M76 and kills Fredo.

Joker: Darkred Darkred Darkred Darkred Darkred

Corleone: Grey Grey Grey Grey

Enraged at his brother's death, Michael grabs a tommy gun and kills the clown thug with the glock.

Joker: Darkred Darkred Darkred Darkred

Corleone: Grey Grey Grey Grey

The two teams fire at each other, each trying to get an edge. During the firefight, Peter loads his Lupara shotgun and takes out another Joker goon.

Joker: Darkred Darkred Darkred

Corleone: Grey Grey Grey Grey

Realizing they are outnumbered now, The Joker and his remaining henchman retreat deeper into the hotel, with the remaining Corleone family members trying to catch up to them. As they approach a hallway, one of the Joker's men armed with a M1 Garand fires the rifle and wounds Peter. Salvatore tries to shoot the thug with his Browning Automatic Rifle, but misses.

He, Michael, and Sonny follow the two remaining Joker thugs, while Peter struggles to follow. Suddenly he hears someone behind him say, "Excuse me, kind sir, but do you know what time it is?". He turns and sees the Joker, Remington 870 in hand.

The Joker says, " It's time to die!", then shoots Peter at point blank range with the shotgun.

Joker: Darkred Darkred Darkred

Corleone: Grey Grey Grey

Meanwhile, in the hotel's dining room, the two remaining Joker goons come face to with Sonny and Salvatore and a gunfight ensues. During the confusion, Salvatore takes cover behind a table while Sonny takes out one of the clowns with his Browning Rifle.

Joker: Darkred Darkred

Corleone: Grey Grey Grey

The other clown (who has the duffel bag) retreats to the basement, with Sonny in hot pursuit. Meanwhile, the Joker enter the dining room and grabs one of his dead henchmen's M1 Garands and takes out Salvatore, who popped out of the table to check if the coast was clear. The Joker shakes him and says, "Hey! Are you awake?".

Joker: Darkred Darkred

Corleone: Grey Grey

Meanwhile, in the basement, the last goon sets the duffel bag on the floor and fires his M1 Garand at Sonny. Sonny fires back, though, and wounds him with his Browning auto rifle. He goes down the stairs and picks up the duffel bag, thinking there might be money in there, unaware that the goon is still alive and is pulling out a dentonator. Realizing he has no choice, he pushes the button on the remote, blowing up the the grenades in the duffel bag, taking out both himself and Sonny.

Joker: Darkred

Corleone: Grey

The explosion alerts Michael, who quickly rushes toward the dining room. He sees his dead brother and briefly mourns him, when suddenly, a bullets flies and hits a lamp. He looks and sees the Joker, Glock in hand. Michael angrily pulls out his M1911 and fires back, missing. The Joker aims carefully and hits the gun, knocking it out of Michael's hand. Realizing he's been beat, Michael raises his hands in defeat. The Joker laughs and pulls the trigger, but finds that he's out of bullets. He quickly runs away while Michael pulls out an ice pick and follows him. The Joker pulls out his knife and slashes Michael across his cheek, leaving a scar. Michael counters, though, and stabs the Joker in his arm with the ice pick. He then punches the Joker in the face, disarming the Jker of his knife. He points the ice pick to te Joker's throat. He says, "You kill my family, I'll kill you. Any last words?"

The Joker laughs and says, "Yeah. Why so serious?".

He then kicks Michael in the stomach and quickly picks up his knife and says, "Let's put a smile on that face!"He then scars Micheal's mouth in the shape of a smile and finally stabs michael in the chest with knife, killing him.

Joker: Darkred


He cleans the blood off the knife and laughs, disappointed that his plan failed, but pleased at his victory.

Winner: The Joker

Expert's Opinion[]

Even though Michael and his family members were a lot tougher than the Joker's goons, the Joker's wit as well as slightly more advanced weaponary helped the Clown Prince of Crime defeat the Son of the Godfather.

To see the original battle, weapons, and votes, click here.


The battle was declared invalid because Michael Corlenore was given a BAR and an icepick, weapons he never used.

Battle vs. Punisher (2004 Film) (by WraithOfWaffle)[]

Gotham National Bank, 2008

Gotham City, the crime hellhole of the United States. This place was a criminal's paradise and today was an example.

"Everyone on the ground!" a man with a clown mask said as he shot his AKMSU in the air. 

Everyone went down as two other men with clown masks went to the bank vault and tried to crack it.

"So how much he payin' ya?" one of the men said as they set their equipment down.

"I don't know, six shares is plenty." the other man replied.

Meanwhile, two other men in clown masks are rappeling to the roof of the bank from another building. Once they land they open up a metal box and cut some wires.

"So why do they call him The Joker?" the one cutting the wires asks.

"He likes to wear make up to intimidate people, war paint." the other man replies.

"And there goes the silent alarm. Weird, it doesn't connect to 911, only a private number." the man says confusingly.

As the man behind him prepared to raise his gun both meet a flurry of 9mm bullets. The bullets were from an MP5A5 held by a man in a trench coat and shirt with a white skull on it. 

The man then rushed downstairs and tried to stop this bank robbery.

As this is going on, one of the bank robbers is putting grenades in each hostage's hand.

"Obviously we don't want you to do anything with your hands besides hold on for dear life." one of the bank robbers says.

At the vault, the men that have to crack the vault are having a pretty easy job, it's all going well until they hear footsteps. One of the men takes aim with his Glock 17 and investigates, only to meet a similar fate as the men from the roof.

The other man grabs his AKMSU and fires, not hitting a thing. He then gets shot in the chest and head by the strange man.

Another man in a clown mask sees this and opens fire with his M76. The man in the trench coat takes cover in the vault room but gets hit in the shoulder. He then takes out the M4A1 he had slung over his shoulder and puts the goon down. 

"What was that?" one of the robbers who took care of the hostages asked. "I'll check it out."

He went up to the vault room but found nothing but three corpses. He tries to run back but sees the man.

"You're... you're..... Frank Castle!" he says in fear.

Castle opens fire with his M4A1 and moves on.

"What's taking him so long?" the last man asks.

Then the unthinkable happen, an employee with a sawed off Remington 870 in his desk shoots at the masked man but missed.

The masked man then opens fire with his M76, hitting the man in the head. The man takes the Remington and removes his mask, revealing the blood red lips, ghostly white face, and black eyes that have haunted Gotham.

The Joker. That's the name he went by in this town and everyone was scared of him.

Then he sees a figure at the opposite side of the bank. Then he notices that this wasn't a man in a clown mask but a name he's been hearing a lot lately.

"Frank Castle, The Punisher." The Joker says.

Castle then opens fire with his M4A1 but notices he's out of ammo. He then takes out the sawed off double barrel shotgun he had and tries to sneak up on The Joker.

The Joker just sprays with his M76 until he runs dry. He then picks up the sawed off Remington 870 and aims but can't find Castle. He then sees Castle but he unloads both of his shells rapidly.

The Joker laughs but got hit with a pellet from one of the shells. He then happily unloads his own shotgun shells but narrowly misses Castle.

"Great." The Joker says as he drops his Remington and takes out his Glock 17.

Castle then takes out his own pistols, his dual custom M1911A1s.

Both men unload their pistols towards each other. As they shoot they manage to hit each other in the shoulder. 

Castle, with his already injured shoulder, grabs it in pain and notices The Joker with his Glock pointed at his head. The Joker pulls the trigger only to reveal a click that surprises both men.

Thinking fast, Castle hits The Joker in the mid section and takes out his butterfly knife. The Joker then takes out his Smith and Wesson Extractor 1600 and tries to stab Castle. Castle then thrusts his knife into The Joker's leg and twists it. The Joker howls in pain as Castle's knife tears his leg. The Joker then kicks The Punisher in the face with his other leg, falling down in the process.

All of a sudden, a school bus comes crashing in the bank. The back door opened, revealing the driver was a member of The Joker Gang.

"Come on boss!" the goon said.

"If you excuse me, I have to leave now." The Joker said limping towards his escape vehicle.

The Joker threw the sawed off Remington 870 and entered the bus. But didn't close the door. Instead he was grabbing something. He revealed his Norinco Type 69 RPG and takes aim at Castle.

"Here's a little gift." The Joker said grinning.

Castle looks of as The Joker aims the Type 69 but remembers the M203 he had on his M4A1. He looks at the M4A1 and rushes to it. But he was too slow, seemingly destroyed from the blast.

"Let's go." The Joker says. Disappointed he didn't get any money but satisfied he was able to kill The Punisher.

Then the unthinkable happens, a grenade shot flew to the bus killing The Joker and his goon in a firey explosion.

Castle looks at the carnage and the hostages. Then he hears police sirens wailing off in the distance. The Punisher leaves before the GCPD could spot him.

At an alleyway across from the Gotham National Bank, a white van is looking off at the scene with cops holding curious civilians back from the damage of the robbery. People looked in shock as they saw the destroyed school bus. Other people took pictures as more body bags exited the building and more crying hostages felt their loved one's embrace. 

A male voice rang from the radio, "Today at the Gotham National Bank a failed robbery took place as the criminal known as The Joker attempted to steal money from the vault. This failed when him and his gang members were killed by an unknown man. The manager of the Gotham National Bank was also killed as he tried to shoot the criminals only to be shot himself. Hostages say the person who foiled the robbery was a caucasian male in his mid 30s to early 40s, of muscular build and had black hair. He also wore a black trench coat and black shirt with a white skull on it. Police believe that this man was vigilante Frank Castle, also known as The Punisher, is a former Delta Force member who committed several murders after the deaths of his family. If you have the whereabouts of Frank Castle, do not approach him and call the GCPD. This is Mike Engel of GCN, signing out."

With a blank look on his face, Frank turned the ignition and drove off onto the road. He then said "The guilty shall be punished." as he drove off, victorious.

Expert's Opinion[]

While The Punisher was outnumbered, he was better trained and mentally healthy compared to The Joker. The Joker was untrained and was only more brutal than Castle, which wasn't enough to get him the win.

To see the original battle, weapons, and votes, click here.


The battle was declared invalid because the Joker was given an AKMS despite never using one.

Battle vs. Auric Goldfinger (by Tesla Man)[]

Brooklyn, New York


The Joker constantly would glance out the window nervously, looking for something. Him and his crew had heard of Auric Goldfinger, thats why they were in his mansion, looking to take his gold to cause disorder, and to kill Goldfinger as well, another attack. They were able to break in through a vault door, and now, now was the moment of glory.

"Hurry up!" The Joker jeered "Goldfinger could be here any minute now, it doesnt take that long to eat dinner down the street" The Joker rushed forward and pushed the henchman opening the door aside. He slammed the door open, taking in all the glory of it.

"We got it boys" The Joker whispered in awe "We got the gold"

he was right, inside were probably twenty or thirty goldbars, illuminated by the light in the window. He reached out to touch the gold. Inside the vault it was hot, dry and steaming, with gold dust circulating around inside the round vault. When the Joker touched the gold, he had set up a puff of gold dust that escaped through the opening, planting themselves on his face, and on the clown masks on his henchmens face.

He turned to his henchmen "Get this in the truck" he had that look in his eyes that normaly he had when he was being serious, which he very seldomly had.

The henchmen had dove to the vault, trying to be the first to get to touch the gold and put it in thier sack. The Joker backed up, noticing out of the corner of his eye something moving out of the giant glass window that made up the wall of the office. Looking out it, he saw Goldfinger walking through. He had sweat dripping down his face as he huffed down the sidewalk. He had cake painted on his jacket, so he was probably coming back to wash it off. He was about three fourths of the way past the window, when he stopped and looked into his office through the window.

The Joker tried to stand still 'mabye if i stand still he wont see me'. what was in his head and what was in reality were two different things, because his henchmen were now in a full out fist fight to the left of him.

Goldfinger gasped and continued running, until he made it to the door of his mansion. Joker began to think, 'its a maze to get here, its going to take him atleast two or three minutes for him to get to the door and but through' but that still wasnt enough time to escape the way they came, through the air ducts.

"Ok boys, how much gold you got?" The Joker stared to his left to see his men fighting over who gets the last gold bar. "Move!" The Joker screeched into thier ears. "I get the last gold bar because if it wasnt for me, NONE OF YOU would be here" the Joker had almost blew his last fuse. He took a step forward and reached into the vault, grabbing the last gold bar, putting it purple jacket. "Thank you" the Joker gave his henchmen his famous creepy smile "now we have to find a way to get out of here."

The Joker reached into the other side of his jacket opposite to the side with the gold bar and pulled out his Glock 17, and fired at the glass wall. The alarm went off as he gestured for his henchmen to lead him out.

The Joker, being the clever criminal he always was, planted a pack of C4 in a drawer or Goldfingers desk. "This is gonna be a blast." The Joker giggled at his pun, then ran to catch up with his henchmen.

They ran behind the building, which took maybe four minutes due to how massive this mansion was. Behind the building was thier truck, parked on the side of the road that ran behind the building. It wasnt any normal truck, this was an army truck. It was big, black, and sleek, and basicly, it looked like a mail truck painted black and made out of bullet resistant walls.

"Get in!" the Joker ordered for his men to get in the back of the truck with thier gold bags. The Joker walked to the back of the truck and tossed in his gold bar, then continued walking to the right side of the truck and jumped into the drivers seat.

"Were going to Gotham boys!" The Joker let out a crackle and stomped on the gas, as the truck lurched forward. The Joker looked in the rear view mirror to see Goldfinger and four henchmen race out the back of the building and onto the median of the highway.

"Bye-Bye" the Joker whispered to himself as he pushed a button with his left hand, setting off the bomb he set Goldfingers mansion, sending red brick shard flying.

Goldfinger hit the deck, along with his henchmen. The roof began to collapse on itslelf, taking out what was left of the first floor, then the seccond floor followed behind, as the third floor leaned on the neighboring building, crashing through the other buildings walls. A tidal wave of dust erupted from the structure, covering Goldfinger and his men in a thick layer of dust that shattered glass windows on the neighboring buildings, and destroyed your chance of seeing anything on the road.

As the dust desolved, Goldfingers image shimmered into view, coughing and gasping for breath, he screemed at his henchmen, "Go to the parking lot. and Get The Car!"

His henchmen ran off and about half an our later, reappeared with a Rolls Royce. Goldfinger jumped into the driver seat moving the previous driver over to the passenger side, as as Goldfinger loaded his Brownig Hi-Power, he whispered, "To Gotham", and he slammed his foot on the accelorator.

Gotham, New Jersey


"Come on, come on" the Joker nudged ne of his henchmen with his rocket launcher, "I know Goldfingers dead, but we still have the cops to worry about" The Joker grumbled "so lets keep moving, we caused enough panic on the road to get here that the entire NYPD is probably chasing after us."

The Jokers henchman looked up at him, his expression was hidden behind that clown mask, but it was easy to see he was grinning. He grabbed a bag and hoisted it up on his shoulder, and walked into one of the buildings that made up one of the walls of the ally.

The Joker was standing in the back of the truck, pushing bags filled with gold down the ramp, and into the hands of his 3 henchmen that were helping with the gold. the other, was standing guard with a Smith & Wesson M76.

"Hey" the Joker panted, "Do you see the cops anywere?" the guard turned and the Joker pushed the last bag down the ramp as it was taken into the building.

"Not yet sir" the guards voice sounded muffled and cut off as the mask beat against his face as his jaw moved.

The Joker, now drenched with sweat, took is rocket lancher off his back and laid it against the wall of the truck. He collapsed on the ground and removed his purple jacket. His white, red, and black face paint began to smear and became runny as it rolled down the side of his neck.

a few minutes had passed and the truck smelled like a gym. all of the Joker's henchmen were laying in the truck, rolling thier neck back and forth, one had taken thier mask off, but Joker began yelling at him as the henchman groaned and put the rubber mask back on his face.

They were feeling better and were talking about things, when the guard ran up to the truck and yelled "theyre coming!" The Joker stared at him, "The Police?" The Guard shook his head, "Goldfinger"

The Joker grabbed his rocket launcher that he had layed across his outstretched legs, and rolled out of the truck. The rest of the men followed as they eached grabbed a Smith & Wesson M76 and flopped out of the truck.

The Joker, looking around the glossy, black side of the truck, nothiced a Rolls Royce barreling towards them, full speed.

"Fire at them!" The Joker screamed and pointed at the Limo. "Fire!"

The Henchmen walked towards the truck, firing thier guns at the 60mph Rolls Royce. It was a quick attack, 4 henchmen, vs 1 Goldfinger henchmen in the passender seat firing his MP40. asphault sprayed into the air infront of the Joker henchmen, as they returned the favor with a hail of bullets to the front of the car. Shattering the glass, forcing Goldfinger to duck, as he drove the car forward. Only about 10 metres away now, The Joker henchmen becan to back away toward the walls, and wiith one final blow, they had popped a tire on the front end of the car, sending it spinning out of control down the ally until it slammed into a waste bin.

Back in the truck, the Joker was loading his rocket launcher and aiming at the car. Realizing this, Goldfinger yelled at the passengers in the car, "get out!" They followed orders and opened their car doors and jumped out, all except one. His door was stuck between him and the waste bin, going into panic mode, he nervously kept slamming his door against the waste bin hoping it would give out. he looked out the window, seeing the Joker aim his rocket launcher, he closed his eyes tight, as the rocket hit the car, exploding in a gust of burning red hot fire, as scraps of melted metal fell from the air, landing in the rubbish that layed in the waste bin.

Goldfinger and his other men dove behind what was avalibale in the alley. A pile of boxes below the fire escape ladder that ran up the building to the roof, a small staircase leading up into a boarded up door, and the charred remains of the Rolls Royce that Goldfinger and one henchman hid behind. Hidden, Goldfinger's crew began firing, missing thier targets. Realizing they were in danger, The Jokers henchmen ran to the nearest cover, leaving one man standing in a free-fire zone, confused, as bullets hailed down on him.

Noicing that the killing blow came from the Goldfinger henchmen behind the crates, The Joker loaded his last rocket into his rocket launcher and fired, hitting the ladder that was right above the henchmens head. The henchmen ducked down as the rocket propeled itself into the wall, shattering masonry that was probably layed in the 1920's and leaving the ladder on its last rim.

Realizing the henchmen was dead, one of the Jokers henchmen occupied the spot, hiding behind the crates, he finaly raised himself and his gun over the crates, simultaneously with the apparently still alive henchmen hiding on the other side of the crate.

Now his gun, and the gun of Goldfinder's henchmen were placed inbetween eachothers eyes, with thier fingers on the trigger. they were both breating hard and has mosquitoes darting across thier faces as the moon rose up into the air.

A loud creak above them made it relevant that the ladder above them was about to collapse. Neither one dared to look to see if it was over their head or not, leaving the life of one of them dangling on the last rim of the ladder. Finaly a large crash echoed through the alley, as the ladder had fallen on the Goldfinger henchmen, rendering him unconsious. glaring over the boxes, the Joker henchmen, saw the Goldfinger henchman breathing, with blood spilled everywere. He raised his gun over the crates as a bullet came darting through his skull, making him fall on top of the ladder, making a sandwich with humans on the outside and a burnt ladder on the inside, yum.

The force of the falling henchman but pressure on the henchman below, finaly cracking the mans ribs, and making his skull fracture.

The Joker threw his rocket launcher on the ground and pulled out his Glock 17 and jumped out of the truck, sending waves of air streaking across his green vest as he fell to the ground. Smiling, he walked forward with his glock pointed at the Henchmen behind the stairs. he fired, making bullets ricochet off the cement steps, smashing the sides. Finally, giving up, he charged out from behind the stairs, full fire, spraying the alley with a hail of bullets.

One of the Jokers henchmen mirrored the action and ran out, firing, only to be shot back with a bullet from Goldfinger, hitting him in the right eye, sending him flying backwards, landing as his white mask soon became painted with blood.

The Goldfinger henchmen that had been so phycopathicly spraying bullets, soon ran out of the projectile, and attempted to reload, only to drop his spare magazine.

Taking the chance, the Joker ran over to his dead comerade and grabbed his Smith & Wesson, and pulling the trigger as fast as he could, decorating the reloading henchmen with bullet holes, spraying blood onto the charred remains of the Royce.

Goldfinger, remembering his goal, he wondered, where did they put my gold? then turned to his bodyguard and pointed at a door in the same building where the truck was parked, and whispered to his henchmen "We go into that building, on the count of three." for a big guy like him, he had a fairly nice voice. it was calm, a deep, powerful voice, with a tone of the young Russian kid in there that he would refuse to let out.

"one" Goldfinger took a breath as he looked down at his Browning Hi-Power, looking at the reflection of the Joker against the side of his gun.

"two" he took an even deeper breath as a bullet collided with the side of waste bin he was leaning against. He got up into running position with his left foot flat on the ground with the toe of his right shoe planted against the asfault.

"three" Goldfinger sprang up with his henchmen as he ran for an iron door on the side of the red masonry building. He opened the 70 pound door, using it as a shield for the oncoming rain of bullets. He gestured for his henchmen to go first, as he followed him in.

The Joker glared at his last henchman with that demonic glare in his eye that shimmered under the moonlight. "You got in through that door." He pointed to the door which they had brought the gold into the building through. "and I'll..." The Joker looked down at his gun that he was now rocking back and forth, "I'll think of something" the Joker turned around and walked forward as his henchman stood and stared at him. "What are you waiting for? Go!" the henchman turned around with his Smith & Wesson and began jogging towards the big garage door.

Goldfinger had entered a room that looked like it was part of an office. It was entirly made of concrete walls and a colourful carpet, with two vending machines built up against the wall along with a picture frame filled with a photo of an overhead view of Gotham. The painting layed between the two vending machines and a water jug despenser that looked as if it hadnt been refilled for years.

They marched into the next room that looked like a lobby, with sofas, a fireplace, and a variety of plants all placed below a glass chandelier. It didnt look like this building was being used, because there were cobweds hanging everywere, and the only lights that worked were either flickering, or not visable. This place should have been scheduled for demolition years ago, but i guess the city of Gotham is just lazy.

"Boss, you hear that." Goldfingers last henchman whispered in his ear. "it sounds like..." he squinted his eyes "it sounds like whistling."

"yeah, i hear it" he pointed his pistol up and focused his sights into the next room. "come on, lets go" they peered around the corner of the lobby and stared into the hallway, noticing one of the Jokers henchmen whistling with his sub machine gun at hand.

"where are you?" the henchmen's tone was creepy, like a clown on drugs "im not going to hurt you guys" he chuckeld, "i just want to be friends" his voice quieted on his last line as he turned the corner into the lobby without hesitation. nothing.

quiet beeps echoed through the building, "i know your in here" the henchmen squinted his eyes to see in such dark light, "you can run, but you can never hide" he looked around, "ill find you one way or another"

his eyes focused on a moving object that had scampered into the room. it had two lights on it, flashing with the beeps that kept being heard.

"What is this?" he walked up the the flashing lights as nerve gas was sprayed in a puff of smoke, making him collapse to the ground.

Goldfinger and his henchmen entered the room, staring at the twitching body that twisted around on the floor. "may i do the honors?" Goldfinger pointed his gun at the henchmen at his statment and fired, hitting him in the desired eye.

As if previously rehearsed, immediantly after the gunshot, a rumble arose from outside.

"what is that?" Goldfingers henchmen walked up to the wall lstening to the approaching noise. unphased by the clues that this thing was big, and getting closer by the seccond, he turned to Golfinger, hands still planted against the wall, he removed his ear and rotated his head, now facing Goldfinger, "I dont know what that is b..."

an eruption arose from the wall, sending bricks flying and a chanelier falling, as Goldfinger jumped out of the way. The henchman was flung against the roof of the black army truck. The truck was tilted at an angle about 3 feet up into the wall. The henchman, now dangling from the slanted roof, looked as if he has broken a limb and was screaming for his dear life.

The Joker, staring at Goldfinger, cocked his Golck and pushed the nose of the gun against the roof of the truck from the inside and fired, sending a bullet through the roof and into the body of the henchman. The Joker chuckled as he fired the gun at his window and crawled out. he stood straght up on the slanted hood of the car, then slid down as if he were snowboarding down the side of a short hill. he had made it to the edge of the hood, as he dropped off the side of the truck, falling about 5 feet to the ground, the Joker whiped the dust away from his vest.

He cracked a smile as best as he could with a cut lip from the impact with the building. He tilted his head as he walked closer to Goldfinger. Goldfinger, staring motionless and fearless to the Joker as he was circled by the clown. The Joker finally, now finished with his taunting, pointed his Glock at Goldfingers head.

The Joker, slowly pulled the trigger of his gun, creating suspence in Goldfingers mind. The Joker has finaly pulled the trigger, setting off a click. The Joker removed the gun from Goldfingers head and stared down at it "damnit" he whispered "out of bullets".

Goldfinger swung his fist around and apparently had managed to put on his trench knife and swung at Joker, sending him flying backwards. The Joker stumbled to stand up as Goldfinger grabbed him by the vest and slammed him against the wall.

He held the blade to the Jokers throat, preparing to slash. Behind them, the wall couldnt hold the weight of the truck anymore, and finaly gave out, sending the 3 tonne truck crashing to the floor, kicking up dirt and dust covering Goldfinger. Out of curiosity, Goldfinger took his attention off of the Joker and quickly glanced at the truck, once black and sleek, now bashed, battered, and dirt encrusted. This short ammount of time was enough for the Joker to push Goldfinger backwards, unsheathing his comat knife.

Gotham, New Jersey

7:05 am

The Police were finaly able to enter the building after a safety check. It was filled with dust as light shown through the boarded up windows. The lobby was a mess. Hotel Magazines were thrown across the floor, blood splatered over the walls, and glass decorated the floor from the chandelier collapsing. the center of it all was the dead bodies. three bodies layed against the ground in the room. One, wearing a clown mask with a bullet hole in its head, another, wearing a top hat and a three piece suit was found near the reamains of a wrecked truck with a bullet through the chest of the body, with three broken ribs and one broken femur. The last, layed on one of the sofas, with a slit neck and a mutilated face far beyond recognition that the victim was even human.

There had been more dead bodies found outside that were all being caried on a streacher into several ambulances parked outside the ally. But the ones in the building were the most intruiging. Inside, several police were scavaging the area of who killed all these men, it must have been a gang war, but they were left to wonder, who killed the man on the sofa.

Observing the man on the sofa, they were able to retrieve a pocket watch from his suit, now stained with blood reading the back, there was a name

Auric Goldfinger

The Policeman raced to unhook his radio

"this is John Leam, reporting from Downtown Gotham, we think we got something" he lowered his radio as he flipped the watch back and forth in his hand, observing the front and back

'this is station 3, do you have something?' He raised up his radio

"yea, our victim, Auric Goldfinger" he lowered the radio

'do you have any information as of who killed this man?' The cop raised the radio

"not yet, we will get back to you as soon as possible" The policeman walked up to one of his fellow officer and whispered "out victim is Auric Goldfinger, now we just need to find who killeed him"

"on it" the officer replied. but he wouldnt need to look very far. One of the officers observing the truck and found something.

"guy, come over here, i think i found something." the two other officers walked over to the truck. "right here" the Officer pointed to a playing card wedged in between the windshield whipers and a remaining peice of glass on the window that hadnt been shattered.

It was crumpled up slightly and bared the image of a clown on a unicycle on the yellowed, cracked, paper.

"we found our suspet" the officer whispered.

Winnier: The Joker

Expert's Opinion[]

Please consider a contribution by writing an expert's opinion as to why the Joker won.

To see the original battle, weapons, and votes, click here.


Battle was declared invalid due to Auric Goldfinger being given weapons he never used.

Battle vs. Indiana Jones (by Facetheslayer)[]

Max hits the enter key, as the screen goes to a Matrix effect, as Joker is seen with four of his gang members readying to rob the elusive Peruvian fertility idol, as a whip was snapped in the background, while Indiana Jones was seen with five armed OSS agents, as he stated "That belongs in a museum, Joker!"

"Oh poo, the hero's here. Get him, boys!" Joker said, running off with the idol, as two of his men fired M76's, while anotehr was firing a Glock-17, as Joker and a Henchman ran away. Indy fired two shots from his M1917 at Joker, but missed them, as one of his men stepped forward with the Lewis Gun, taking out one of the men with an M76, but getting hit with the other henchemen, before both of them retreat down the hall, towards the WW2 exhibit, as Indy's men are in pursuit. Red Blue (4-4)

{C Meanwhile, Joker sees an M1 Garand and an MP40 on display, as he smashed the glass with the Idol, before taking the M1 Garand for himself, as his accomplice takes the MP40. One of Indy's men went down the hallway with the Lewis, but Joker shoots him in the neck with his M1 Garand, before running back. Red (3-4) As Indy runs in, Joker's henchman was about to fire the MP 40 at Indy, before he used his whip to snare the weapon, and snagged it towards him, as Indy grabbed it before firing holes into the henchman with the weapon. Blue (3-3)

{C The trio of criminals try to escape as one of them sprayed his M76, before it ran dry, as he ran towards an elevator, while Joker and the last henchman continue down the hall. Indy and another OSS agent, brandishing another M1917 ran that way, as the RPG user sees the henchman and stopped. Panicking as the elevator wouldn't activate, the man fired his rocket into the cabin of the elevator, instantly killing the henchman. Blue (3-2)

{C As he discarded the weapon, Indy passed the MP40 to him, as they ran ahead. At the end of the hallway, Joker told his man that he was going to hide in the closet, while the exit was just ahead. As Joker hides, the man with the MP 40 was ready to shoot him, but the henchman shoots him with a burst from the Glock. Red (2-2)

{C Indy tells the man to split up for Joker, as the OSS agent sees the Henchman, while Indy was about to run down the side hall. Joker's henchman runs to the door, to see that it's barred, as he fired the Glock, to see it's ran dry, while teh OSS Agent runs into the room, as Joker comes from behind, and seals the area off, and reveals a remote trigger, as the OSS Agent realized the Joker Bomb next to his foot, as it released the poisonous Joker Toxin into the air, killing his own henchman and the OSS agent, as Joker lets out a wicked cackle. Indy hears this, and backtracked, while Joker watched and laughed, until a round from the M1917 whizzed by him, breaking the glass, as Joker runs into the library. Indy stopped for a second to look at the victims, as they both have a wide smile on their faces. Red Blue (1-1)

{C Indy fired a shot from his revolver, and barely misses, while Joker managed to shoot the gun out of Indy's hand. As he was about to deliver the final blow on Indy, the weapon jammed, as Joker frusttratedly thrown it aside. Drawing his knife, as Indy grasped his whip, Joker was about to stab him, as Indy side stepped, and gave Joker a right hook, as he laughed, before recovering. "Let's give you a scar to match!" Joker says, slashing an identical mark to his scar upon his chin, as Indy gives him an uppercut into a bookshelf. Stepping back towards his revolver, he noticed a heavy Ming vase atop the shelf. he snapped the whip at it, causign it to fall on Joker's head, shattering and stunning him long enough to put the last round of his weapon into Joker's left orbital. Blue (1-0) Seeing the Clown Price of Crime go down, Indiana quipped. "I told you, it belongs in a museum" He says, seeing the idol, and picking it up to return it to it's proper place.

Winner: Indiana Jones

Expert's Opinion[]

Please consider a contribution by writing an expert's opinion as to why Indiana Jones won.

To see the original battle, weapons, and votes, click here.


Battle was declared invalid due to usage of a composite Joker.

Battle vs. Tyler Durden (by BeastMan14)[]

Durden: Black2Black2Black2Black2Black2Red

Joker: GreenGreenGreenGreenGreenPurple

Gotham City, midnight...

A large van pulls up into the back of the skyscraper. Both wearing white suits, a duo consisting of a slightly unkempt man with blonde hair and another man, face heavily bruised, step out as a man in a suit walks out and asks in a polite tone,"May I ask what your business is, sir?" The blonde man, with a grin, replies,"We're the catering. For mister Wayne's party for Harvey Dent?" The man gives a look of un-amused seriousness, then says,"Sir, the catering arrived an hour ago. I don't approve of tricks and I'm going to ask you to lea-" A round from a Smith & Wesson slams into his chest and he falls, dead. "Alright, boys, open up the van!" Tyler Durden, wannabe revolutionary, shouts as the van's back door slides open and 5 other gun toting Project Mayhem members climb out. "Alright, here's the plan. Mister Wayne here wants to cut down on our operations and is funding the police to do it. We find him, and try to convince him otherwise." Tyler says to his men as they nod and load up weapons.

A indiscreet cluster of cars pulls up to the front of the building. Out climbs the Joker, feared gangster, and his men. "Well, looks like this is the place. We find Harvey Dent, and we kill him off like the dog he is." Pulling out his Glock, armed with a silencer, he fires, ridding the doorman with bullets. "Get rid of that body willya? Don't need any spoilers for the suprise." The Joker laughs as his goons pick up the body and put it into the back of the van. "Tonight, we're gonna have ourselves some fun."

Tyler and his men walked into the lobby of the building, guns at the ready. "Keep it close everybody. Angel Face, you take Chuck over here and plant those bombs. If Bruce or any of those fatcats try to bail, we blow the elevators straight to hell." Angel Face nods and he and the other man walk away. As Tyler turns the corner, he and his men find themselves just a few feet away from the Joker. Tyler had heard some stuff about this man, that he was dangerous, and did things for no purpose other than to spread chaos. Tyler decided to play dumb. "Who the hell are you?" He shouted. The Joker scowled, "Haven't heard of my yet? Well, then, lets change that." The Joker grinned and laughed as he opened fire, the rounds tearing through a Project Mayhem member, who stumbles back and falls to the ground. Black2

"Get behind some cover!" Tyler yelled, ducking behind a wall, and returning fire with his Smith & Wesson, the rounds narrowly missing the Joker and hitting the goon next to him. Green Joker chuckled, then shouted,"Lets give em a little surprise!" before throwing a grenade that rolled towards Tyler and his backup. "Sh*t!" Tyler shouted and attempted to jump towards a couch for cover. One of his men picked it up to try and throw it back, only to be blown to bits. Black2

Angel Face placed the last bomb on the ceiling of the elevator. The pigs weren't gonna expect that when they tried to run. Suddenly, his backup man yelled,"I heard an explosion! I think Tyler's in trouble!" Angel Face nodded, then picked up his G36. Suddenly, Tyler rounded the corner, shouting,"In the elevators! Go go!" The Joker gang rounded the corner, guns at the ready, to see the elevators going upward. "Up the stairs! We'll cut em off!" The Joker ordered, ominously grinning as one of his men opened their case to reveal an RPG.

Two Project Mayhem members sat in one of the elevators, nervously. Suddenly, they reached the 2nd floor, the door dinging, and opening to find themselves face to face with the Joker and two of his men. "You look nervous. Is it the scars?" The Joker said before pulling the trigger on the RPG. Both men barely let out a shout and were promptly blown apart. Black2Black2 The Joker laughed and tossed the RPG aside. "Well, lets see if Dopey and Chuckles up there caught the other two." He says, walking towards the stairs as his men followed.

Dopey and Chuckles walked around the elevator lobby, waiting to see if Tyler and any other men of his would appear. "So, what are you gonna do when the boss pays us?" Chuckles asked. Dopey said in a grim tone,"Man, we ain't getting paid. The Joker will kill us like he did his last guys." Dopey chuckled,"Man, don't be so pessimistic. Maybe he won't kill us since we're doing a good job." Suddenly, the elevator doors opens, and Dopey and Chuckles whipped around, only to be mowed down by Tyler and Angel Face. GreenGreen

"This clown thinks he's so tough. He's just a weak peace of shit who thinks he's so tough!" Tyler said, slamming his baseball bat onto the head of the dead Joker gang member over and over. Suddenly, the door at the end of the hallway opens and a Joker goon steps out, gun at the ready. Tyler and Angel Face duck for cover behind parts of the wall. The gang member slowly walks down the hallway, cautiously. Suddenly, a door opens and a woman in a black dress steps out. The goon whips around and points his gun at her, and she yelps and ducks back inside. Tyler's bat smashes into the clowns head and he falls, Tyler and Angel Face brutally beating him until he stops moving. Green Tyler spits on his body.

Right then, the Joker and his last man walk through the same door and the gang member shouts,"What's taking you so long? Oh shi-" Tyler and Angel Face open fire, retreating to the elevator as the goon goes down, riddled with bullets. Green The Joker ducks behind cover, waiting for them to pause, then steps out of cover and opens fire with his MAC, and hitting Angel Face in the leg. He lets out a cry and drags himself to the elevator, the Joker closing in on him. Angel Face pulls himself through the elevator just as the Joker reaches him. The Joker pulls up Angel Face and simply says,"Why so serious? You look like you could use a smile..." He laughs as he drives the knife into Angel Face's cheek and forms a rats smile. As the doors close, Tyler appears behind his cover, and pulls out a detonator. Grinning, he yells,"Hey clown! Who's laughing now!" Then hits the button. The elevator, the Joker, and Angel Face are vaporized in the explosion. Black2Purple

Tyler, exhausted, fell onto the ground. "F--K. Now what am I gonna do now?" He said. Picking up his gun, he said,"Well, might as well meet Mister Wayne." He laughed, then walked towards the steps.


Experts Opinion[]

This was super close, with me having to break the tie. Ultimately, I believed that Tyler Durden was the deadliest warrior. He packed better weapons and better backup to win this match.

To see the original battle, weapons and votes, click here.


Battle was declared invalid due to Tyler Durden being given a weapon he did not use.