Deadliest Fiction Wiki

Edit Section

Show's over, motherfuckers
— Hit-Girl

Growing up, Mindy was led to believe that her father, Damon McCready, was a retired cop that had pissed off the wrong people at the wrong time, specifically the Genovese crime family. This would result in the murder of Damon’s wife and Mindy’s mother. Damon would train Mindy to become the crime killing superhero known as Hit-Girl and take her on a perilous quest to kill Genovese crime family and avenge her mother.

However, this was all just a story told by her father. The real Damon McCready is nothing more than an average accountant, a number cruncher obsessed with comic books to the point where he put his own daughter through life-threatening training and countless deadly situations, teaching her how to kill people and be the ultimate crime killer to avenge her mother, whose death was also a lie, all because he wanted her life to be interesting. Together, Damon and Mindy would form the superhero duo of Big Daddy and Hit-Girl, delivering justice to the streets of America.

Eventually, they cross paths with a young, ambitious superhero named Kick-Ass. They invite Kick-Ass and his friend Red Mist to a meeting to discuss forming a superhero team. Red Mist turns out to be the son of the John Genovese, gang leader, who shoots Hit-Girl and captures Kick-Ass and Big Daddy and tortures them. Hit-Girl comes back with seemingly no wounds (revealing that she was wearing kevlar). Unfortunately, Big Daddy was killed before she could come back.

Hit-Girl and Kick-Ass raid Genovese’s house killing all his goons and the leader John Genovese himself. The duo then reveals their identities to each other and live regular lives. Hit-Girl again adopted by Marcus. Red Mist then declares revenge on Hit-Girl and Kick-Ass while donning the new alias of The Motherfucker

Battle vs. Sweet Tooth (Twisted Metal) (by Jackythejack)[]

Hit-Girl and Kick-Ass were walking down the streets of New York City, both of them chatting about some incredibly stupid topics. Kick seemed to be determined to tell Hit-Girl about all of these stupid Youtube videos that he's been watching, and Hit-Girl tried to make it very clear that she didn't care nearly as much as Kick thought she did, but apparently they must have put a lot of metal plates in his head, because he was acting as dense as ever.

Thankfully, Hit-Girl had found what she thought was going to be her saving grace to get away from Kick's ramblings about video games and Youtube. There was an ice cream truck! Just down that alleyway, actually! Hit-Girl even noticed the ice cream man come out of the truck. He was...a weird looking ice cream man, that's for sure, but if there's an ice cream man, then there's definitely an opportunity to get some ice cream.

"Hey, Kick, you want some ice cream?" Mindy had asked, and these seemed to get Kick to stop talking about whatever nerdy thing he was talking about now. He gave Mindy a blank stare for a moment, and she had to gesture down the alleyway to show him what she was talking about. "There's an ice cream truck down there. What do you want?"

Kick looked past Mindy and his eyes widened, presumably upon seeing the ice cream man. His eyes then turned back to Mindy. "You mean you're going down there? To get ice cream from that guy?"

"I mean...yeah. What's so weird about it?" Mindy reached a hand into her pocket to see if she had enough money. She was sure she did, but it helped to make sure. "I mean, that's sort of his job."

"Oh, I'm sorry, I thought the fact that his head was on fire might have made him a bit too intimidating." Kick spoke in a sarcastic tone, and Hit rolled her eyes.

"Look, I've seen weirder things than that, Kick. I'm sure it's just like special effects or something."

"Special effects? Do you see a camera crew around here?" Kick gestured his hands wildly to their surroundings to further support his point.

"No, but I do see a park right next to us, and that's where I want you to wait for me while I get the ice cream."

"Dude, we can go get ice cream literally anywhere else. It's New York City! We don't have to go down some alleyway to-"

"Kick, listen to me, I'm going down that alley, and it's going to be fine, alright? If that guy is any trouble than I'll be able to take care of him, and you know that. I'm sure I've dealt with worse."

"Uh..." Dave glanced between the alleyway and Hit-Girl as his mind went through the options. She probably wasn't going to give up until he let her go. He let out a sigh. "Fine, fine. Go ahead, I'll be waiting for you."

"That's good," Mindy said with a grin as she took a side step towards the alley. "Now, what flavor ice cream do you want?"

"Mint, please," Kick called out as he walked towards the park, and the girl nodded as she moved towards the ice cream truck, a wad of one dollar bills in her pocket that she was going to hope could buy at least one ice cream cone. Hey, if she didn't have enough, Dave could go awhile without ice cream, and she deserves one after putting up with him the whole time.

Needles had gotten out of his car for only a moment to take a quick break from all of the driving. He didn't expect to stay in the city for too long, and he was either going to leave this place with an increased kill count, or he was planning on smashing a few buildings before leaving. No, it wouldn't do him any good in the long run, but it's cathartic as all get out to smash down a building every once and awhile. As for why he was in an alley, well, they don't allow people with flaming heads into gas stations, mostly due to an explosive hazard.

Besides, one of the best things about driving an ice cream truck everywhere was that you had all of the ice cream you needed in case you get hungry or are in need of a cold treat, which was exactly what Needles was right now. The killer clown had been craving a cold snack ever since he had entered the city. Having a fire constantly burn your scalp makes you uncomfortably hot, as you'd probably guess, and he found out that ice cream more or less subdued the pain for a while.

Just as Needles was about to remove his mask to enjoy his frozen, strawberry delicacy, a girl had approached him and suddenly snatched the ice cream out of his hand. It was such a sudden action that he barely had time to react, let alone stop her. His mind had to take a moment to process what was going on.

"Hey, it's like you can read minds or something," the girl said with a chuckle, but Sweet Tooth had just begun to see red as he watched her begin to lick the ice cream cone that was rightfully his. "Hey, listen, you got any Mint? I got a friend who wants some and I'm willing to pay."

"That was...mine," Sweet tooth had grumbled from under his mask. Was this girl asking for a painful end right now? Because that's exactly how you get one. Needles glanced to the open window on his ice cream truck. He saw his bloodied cleaver laying on the counter, along with a few firearms that were out of the girl's view. They were just an arms reach away from him.

"Oh, come on, you have a whole truck full of this stuff. Don't go all jealous on me," Hit-Girl said with a roll of her eyes, but her words were now falling on deaf ears as Needles' vision was practically tinted red.

"It...was...MINE!" Sweet Tooth's hand had reached into his truck and grabbed the cleaver that was on the counter. He pulled it out into the open and slashed it in the direction of the girl. Mindy's eyes widened in surprise as she stepped back, though she didn't go unscathed. The cleaver managed to knick her shoulder, ripping the fabric of her clothing and cutting her shoulder, but thankfully it wasn't a deep cut.

"Ow! What the hell!?" Hit-Girl had dropped the ice cream in surprise and brought a hand to her shoulder. She saw as Sweet Tooth brought his cleaver up to bring it down, probably intending to split her head into two. Hit rushed to the right before Sweet Tooth could slam the cleaver down onto her. As she moved, she pulled a small butterfly knife out of her pocket and flipped the blade out.

"You're dead meat, girlie!"

“All of this for some ice cream?” Hit asked while ducking underneath a horizontal slice from Needles’ cleaver. She lunged forward and sliced his stomach once with her blade before running towards the entrance of the alleyway.

“You’re not going anywhere!” Sweet Tooth grabs Hit by the arm before she was able to get away and slam her into the side of the ice cream truck. Mindy winced as she was slammed arm first into the side of the truck.

Sweet Tooth brought his cleaver up into the air, but Hit stabbed him in the leg with her butterfly knife before he was able to bring it down on her. The killer clown screamed in pain as he loosened his grip on her, allowing her to get away. Hit turned to face the clown as she slowly backed towards the entrance of the alleyway.

She wasn’t able to leave the alley before Needles had pulled the knife out of his leg and spiked it into the ground. He reached a hand into his ice cream truck and pulled out a firearm. Hit-Girl recognized it was a Tac-9, and she knew that the fight had gone in a direction she wasn’t hoping for.

“Eat lead, bitch.” Sweet Tooth shot his gun towards the girl, and one of the bullets had hit Mindy right in the arm. The girl gasped from the pain and hopped behind a dumpster for some sort of cover. Bullets riddled the alleyway as she reached for the two pistols she had on her.

After preparing herself for the recoil, she hopped out of the dumpster cover and unloaded in the direction of Sweet Tooth. The clown returned with his own fire and neither combatant chose to get into cover.

Two bullets dug themselves into Needles’ right leg, and he kneeled down due to this, but it didn’t stop him from unloading the entire magazine towards Hit. Most of the bullets had missed her, thanks to the girl’s agility, but she received another bullet in the same arm that had already been injured. At that point every shot from her guns would injure her due to the recoil.

“Fine, screw this!” Hit threw the pistols to the side and pulled out a submachine gun. Her MP5. Of course, Kick told her to not bring it out today, but now she was pretty happy she was able to…

“Ah, shit,” Needles’ muttered before a hail of bullets came his way. He hopped behind his truck for cover and made his way inside through the driver side door, but not without Hit trying to take a few potshots at him.

Once Needles had made it into his ice cream truck, he had found another weapon, a gun specifically. He didn’t use them often, but it was good to have them on stock, and now, his MP7 was finally going to get some use.

Needles grabbed the gun and he stuck it out of the window. He pulled the trigger and bullets flew down the alleyway towards the teenager. Hit Girl could barely get out of the way in time, and even then she suffered from a bullet to the leg. She tumbled onto the ground and quickly crawled behind cover as she reloaded her weapon.

“You like that, huh?” Needles asked as he hopped out of the ice cream truck via the giant opening in its side. He fired towards the dumpster, where he had assumed that Hit-Girl was. As the absolute bullet hell was sprayed towards the dumpster, he made his way towards the dumpster, ready to finish this girl off once and for all and get back to his delicious ice cream.

When Sweet Tooth turned the dumpster corner, he fired the last of his magazine into the area behind the dumpster, though, he was surprised to see that there was no one behind the dumpster. Anger turned into confusion as he tried to figure out where the girl had gone to. Then, he had heard footsteps behind him.

Needles’ had stepped to the side the moment he heard those footsteps, and he did so just in time to avoid a katana blade that would have chopped him in half. He spun around and punched towards Hit. He managed to hit her in the face and the girl fell to the ground, clutching the handle of her katana.

“Stay there…” Needles demanded before moving to his ice cream truck once more. He reached inside and his hand grasped the familiar handle of his favorite weapon. Needles chuckled as he pulled out the serrated machete. “You’re gonna bleed!”

By the time he turned back to Hit-Girl, she was pulling herself to her feet, planting her katana into the ground and using it to stabilize herself. She let out a deep breath as she made it to her feet. She held her weapon up and pointed the blade at the clown. “Big mistake, bud…”

Needles then stomped over towards the girl and swung his machete towards her, putting all of his force into it. Hit-girl blocked the attack, requiring both arms to keep the blade in her hands. She struggled as the two locked blades, but eventually she was able to back away from the blade and slice towards Needles.

Needles attempted to stop the blade with his own, but he was too slow on the draw and the katana left a nasty gash on his side. Blood gushed out of the wound in his side. He let out a scream of pain as the warm red liquid ran down his side and his pants.

“You’re gonna pay for that!” Needles swiped his own katana towards the girl and before Hit-Girl was able to react, the serrated edges of the blade dug into her torso, pulling at her clothes and skin and causing her to bleed profusely, blood running down her stomach as she took a step back.

The killer clown let out a laugh as he swung towards her again, and again, and again. Needles would keep swinging his machete towards Hit-Girl, and she’d continue to back away. Eventually, Mindy would aim her blade towards the clown and lunge towards him. Her blade plunged deep into his chest, causing his entire body to tense up.

The man would suddenly let go of his machete and grab onto Mindy’s shoulders and applying a painful amount of pressure onto her. She could barely move her arms now. She struggled against the man’s hold. She could eventually break free from the man’s grasp, though by that time she felt like the man had caused some serious damage to her shoulders based off of sheer grip alone.

Intending to finish this, she pulled the katana out of the man’s chest, causing blood to spurt out and onto the her. The warm blood on her face didn’t bother her much, as soon afterwards she swung her katana towards the clown’s neck. The blade cut through his flesh like a knife through butter.

His head had popped off his shoulders and fell to the ground. Mindy watched as the head rolled away. She let out a deep breath, her muscles relaxing as her eyes glanced towards the car. A spark filled her eyes as she suddenly began to search the killer clown. Maybe he had some keys on him…

Meanwhile, Kick-Ass was waiting in the park, watching some owners play with their dogs and waiting for his ice cream. Though, the amount of time Mindy was gone made him worry. He was about to go and check on her when a giant mech robot suddenly leaped into the park and right in front of the bench he was sitting at.

“Hey Kick!” A familiar voice shouted as the vigilante recoiled in fear. When he heard the voice, he slowly relaxed himself as he stared at the mech. “Get inside! I found a cool ride!”

“H-Hit?” He asked was the mech turned ice cream truck? What the hell? Mindy opened the car door and dragged him into the vehicle. “Dude, you look like a mess! What happened?”

“Sit down and get some ice cream, Kick,” she said as she gestured towards the tubs of ice cream in the back of the truck. The vehicle would slowly transform back into a mech as Kick sat down with a tub of mint ice cream. “I got one hell of a story to tell.”

Expert's Opinion[]

Hit-Girl had been outclassed by the superior weapons that Needles had at his disposal, but what led to her winning the fight was her agility, her small frame, and the fact she has actual combat experience against normal people. Sweet Tooth's lack of experience with fighting others outside of his mech and his affinity for his machete and rare use of firearms also gave him a disadvantage in this fight.

To see the original battle, weapons, and votes, click here.

Rematch vs. Sweet Tooth (Twisted Metal) (by Jackythejack)[]

A motorcycle engine roared into the night as it barreled down empty streets. Atop the vehicle in question was a girl who not only was way too young to drive, but she was also staying up far past her bedtime. Of course, crime never stops to take a rest, and neither does the vigilante hero known as Hit-Girl.

She had been on another one of her nightly patrols. Dave had always told her to maybe calm down with all the nightly activities, but she could never keep herself normal for long. She had been raised on this crime fighting kickassery, and she wasn’t going to give it up anytime soon.

As she blazed past city streets, she noticed something interesting. There were about three separate police cars, all parked in front of some dinky looking café area. Most of the lights were off, and those that were on were blinking on and off, providing a sort of eerie atmosphere. The police cruisers still had their lights on, and there wasn't any sign of anybody outside.

“Weird,” Mindy muttered to herself as she took a sharp turn on her bike. The motorcycle responded in kind and shortly after she was rolling into the cafe’s parking lot. Her motorbike grumbled loudly, only becoming silent as she yanked the keys out of the ignition. She spun a keyring around her finger before shoving it into her pocket.

“Let’s see what we got here,” she said as she walked towards the front door of the café. Even when outside, the limited light that was in the building allowed her to see that no one was standing in the main room of the café. No signs of any police officers. It was a strange sight.

“Why do I get the feeling I’m about to walk into some weird shit?” Mindy’s hand went to her pistol, which she carefully gripped the handle of as she moved forward. She slowly and quietly pushed the cafe’s front door open. As she stepped inside, her eyes began to adjust to the darkness.

As her eyes adjusted, the vague shapes of dead bodies lining the floor would make themselves known. It wasn’t until she noticed the bodies that the smell had hit her dead on. That nasty, iron smell that came with a bloodbath. It hit her like a truck, and she moved her hand from her pistol to cover her nose.

“Oh, god.” It wasn’t an exclamation of fear, but of annoyance and irritation. As she stepped closer, she counted the bodies. Eight of them in total? It was hard to count considering how strewn about some of these body parts were. She was pretty sure at least five of them were officers, the other three being normal civilians. “What the hell happened to you?”

Shortly after she spoke, a sound rang out through the café. It was a loud thumping sound, like heavy footsteps. Heavy footsteps that were heading right towards her!

Mindy spun around and saw a masked man be illuminated by...was that fire? The man’s face was covered in an orange glow, and he was approaching her fast. A light flickered, and reflected off the giant machete blade he held over his head, bloody and rusty from his fresh kills.

“Fuck!” Hit-Girl ran on instinct and unsheathed her sword. She held it out horizontally, to intercept the blade just as it came down. A few sparks rang out, dancing around the two as the masked man slammed down onto her blade with all the force he had...which was a lot, evidently. The impact alone made Mindy’s arms ache.

She stumbled back from the blow, and glared at the man. She could take a closer look at him, and determined that yes, his head was in fact on fire. It dimly illuminated his clown mask, which gave her the most wicked grin she’s ever seen. For a moment, a flash of recognition was present on Mindy’s face, before it turned into steely determination.

“Sweet Tooth?” She asked through gritted teeth, losing the physical altercation as the man pushed against her. Could you blame her, though? The man was easily twice her size. It was impressive she could even stand up to him.

“In the flesh,” the man responded, his voice having a tone of glee to it as he was recognized. It was gross.

Mindy recognized him from the news. They had a breaking news report about him a few days ago, about how he had been sighted in the area, and how he was armed and incredibly dangerous. Honestly, he was just the kind of guy that Mindy was looking for.

“Nice meeting you...” In a risky gambit, she moved her hand away from her blade. Sweet Tooth’s machete pushed forward with the intent of slashing into her. Before the blade could make contact, Mindy used her now free hand to pull out her Glock. She shot him twice in the chest. “Motherfucker…”

Sweet Tooth’s body tensed up from the bullets, and he took a step back. Mindy had expected him to fall to his knees, but he kept standing. If anything, he looked more ready to clobber her than before.

“What the fu-”

She was cut off as Sweet Tooth charged forward, punching her square in the chest. She was sent flying back, and slammed onto one of the café tables. She winced as she tumbled off the table and fell to the ground, knocking the table down with her.

“Guns are for grown ups, kid.”

“Shut up.” She moved into a sitting position, letting go of her sword to pull out her other pistol. Now armed with two firearms, she fired six times at the man. In a surprising display, he had adjusted his machete to block the bullets, just barely protecting his body with the killer hunk of metal.

“I got guns too, kid!” Sweet Tooth put his machete aside, tossing it to the ground as he pulled out a shotgun. He pumped the shotgun and then aimed it towards the child. “Mine’s better!”

“Shit shit shit,” she muttered under her breath as she scrambled to her feet. A shot rang out, the spread barely missing her as she crouched behind the table to use as cover. Another shot rang out, and it took a chunk off the table with it. Again, it just barely missed her. One hit from that thing, and she’d be dead.

“Alright. Plan, plan...I need a plan…” Well, she had a plan, but it was a stupid idea. Which probably meant it was going to work in the long run. She took a deep breath. Always go with your gut, right?

She rolled out of cover, a graceful somersault which ended with her in a kneeling position. She held both guns out and opened fire on the killer clown. She didn’t have a lot of time to aim, and going akimbo made her even more inaccurate. Most of the bullets didn’t hit, but they accomplished their mission of deterring him. Sweet Tooth moved away from the hail of gunfire and moved behind the cashier counter, which would be more than ample cover for him.

That’s when Hit-Girl got to work. She quickly moved from one table to another, knocking it on its side so that it could be used as future cover. Once she had knocked down three other tables, she crouched down again. Alright, pistols won’t cut it. Time to try the machine pistol.

Unfortunately, she didn’t bring her assault rifle with her tonight. It was a stupid thing to do, but she didn’t expect to get into a gunfight tonight. She grabbed her automatic and held it close to her. Just pop up, and pump him full of lead. Pop and pump. Simple enough.

She poked her body out of cover and aimed towards the counter, only to find Sweet Tooth had a similar idea to her own. He was aiming a gun, unmistakably an Uzi, directly at her. Her eyes widened and she fell into a crouching position as bullets sprayed out overhead.

Hit-Girl pressed herself against the table and groaned. This guy was really getting on her nerves. She poked her gun out of cover, towards the counter, and blindly fired in his direction. It wasn’t much, but she might get lucky and hit him.

She fired in bursts, to keep her shots accurate, but judging by the fact Sweet Tooth wasn’t screaming in pain right now, she was going to bet that she missed. She pulled her gun back into cover and changed the magazine, practically slamming it into the mag well. She cocked the gun and closed her eyes for a moment. She had to end this soon, otherwise one of his bullets was going to land.

Hit-Girl bolted up from behind cover and aimed her gun towards the counter, only to see that Sweet Tooth wasn’t there anymore. She faltered for a moment with her aim, and frowned. Where the fuck could a guy that big go without her noticing?

Evidently the answer was “really fucking close by”, because he suddenly appeared next to her, as if coming up from the floor. He grabbed her arm and punched her in the face. Her grip on the gun faltered, and it clattered to the ground.

Sweet Tooth then grabbed her by the throat and lifted her into the air. His grip was tight around her neck, and she struggled to breath. She meekly kicked at him, but she couldn’t get her legs far enough to hit him.

“Thanks for playing,” he said in an almost playful tone before tossing her to the center of the room. Her head slammed back against the tiled floor, and she cried out in pain. Her vision was blurred slightly from impact. As she tried to pull herself together, Sweet Tooth stood before her, holding his giant machete. He let out a dark chuckle.

Hit-Girl brought herself into a sitting position, and attempted to scramble away from him. Any distance she made, however, would quickly be closed by a single step forward from Sweet Tooth. Shit...she needed a weapon. Now.

Her eyes still on Sweet Tooth, she reached around on the ground, trying to grasp anything that could be a weapon. She had her Glocks, but, like an idiot, she forgot to load them before moving onto her machine pistol. This whole night felt like one big rookie mistake.

“I’m gonna enjoy killing you.” The clown laughed as he brought his machete into the air, ready to slaughter her like she was some sort of livestock.

Her hand gripped something. It felt like a gun. Maybe one of the officer’s? Her fingers wrapped around the handle of a gun, and she aimed at Sweet Tooth. She pulled the trigger, and then pulled it again. Then again, and again, and again.

Mindy must have used the entire magazine, unloading the bullets into the clown. Blood spurted out from the gunshot wounds, as the man took several steps back. He could take one or two bullets, but he couldn’t take ten of them at once. At least, Mindy hoped so.

As the man backed away, bleeding from several gunshot wounds, the grip on his machete loosened, and it clattered to the ground. “You…”

He didn’t get a chance to finish his sentence. Mindy pulled out one of her Glocks. It was loaded within a second, and she unloaded that magazine into the killer clown as well. With an extra ten or so bullet stuck in the man, he finally fell over backwards. His head still ablaze, he spent his last few breaths letting out a weak laugh, before falling limp.

Mindy took several deep breaths as she stared at the corpse. She holstered her Glock once more and moved through the café, looking for her other guns, and her sword. Once she had gathered them all up, she walked outside, hopped on her motorcycle, and drove off.


The next day, at family dinner, Mindy lazily poked at the meal that her mother had made, taking a few bites of it. Normally, she wasn’t tired after her nightly patrols, but that damn clown had taken a lot out of her tonight.

“Are you okay, Mindy?” Her mother asked, looking at her with a small amount of concern. “You seem tired. Long day at school?”

“Huh?” Mindy glanced at her mother before nodding. She waved her fork around. “Oh, yeah, you know. Homework and...P.E. and stuff.” She shrugged before turning to her father’s boyfriend. “Marcus, how was work? Find anything cool?”

“Nothing a little girl needs to know about.” The officer took a bite of his own food. As he chewed, the television in the living room blared out to them. It was the sound of another news report. The three glanced into the living room to see a woman at the scene of a cafe, which Mindy recognized as the one she was at last night.

“A gruesome scene has unraveled at a local café downtown. The opening staff were shocked when they stepped into the establishment, and saw eight bodies litter the ground, two of them being café staff, with the other six being police officers. The bodies have reportedly suffered multiple lacerations, stab wounds and gunshots.”

“Oh my god,” Mindy could hear her mom mutter under her breath, as their eyes remained glued to the television.

“At the scene of the crime, officers found a giant, bloody machete. The officers believe that this weapon belongs to none other than the Sweet Tooth killer. Despite his machete being found, though, there were no signs of the Sweet Tooth killer himself. Police officials are currently speculating what this left behind weapon could mean.”

Mindy’s body tensed up. No signs of the killer? But she killed him, right there in that café! “What? That’s impossible!”

Both her mother and Marcus turned to look at her, and she quickly relaxed her body. She shook her head. “I mean, uh, how could one guy take out like, six officers by himself? That’s, like, impossible, isn’t it?”

“Whatever it is, it’s scary.” Her mother shook her head. “Marcus, please be careful out there.”

“I will, don’t worry.” The officer seemed anxious as he spoke, but despite this he continued to eat his food.

Mindy also went back to eating her food, but she was very unhappy. She killed that guy, she knew she did, so either his corpse had somehow been reanimated by black magic, or someone had snagged his body for whatever freaky reason. She hoped it was the latter. The last thing she needed was some killer zombie clown running around with a grudge against her.

Guess that was one more thing she’d have to look out for on patrol tonight...

Expert's Opinion[]

The experts believed that, while Sweet Tooth had the superior physique, Hit-Girl's superior weaponry, experience and intelligence earned her the win this fight.

To see the original battle, weapons, and votes, click here.

Rematch Information[]

The purpose of the rematch was not to change the outcome, but instead to simply make it more accurate and to improve upon the quality, giving both fighters weapons they've actually used, and generally giving the battle a bit more detail and care.

Edit Section

Battles here were deemed to be unfair or otherwise not in accordance with wiki standards, and have been removed from the statuses of the warriors and displayed below.

Battle vs. Hanna Heller (by Thats random369)[]

Hanna is being chased by an assassin disguised as a policeman through the back allies of New York City. Meanwhile a couple allies over, Hit-Girl is butchering some drug dealers. One coked-up drug dealer run towards where Hanna is. The high drug dealer mistakes Hanna for Hit-Girl and fires two shots from his pistol at Hanna. One hitting the assassin, the other grazing Hanna's shoulder. Hanna strings an arrow and fires it directly into the druggies eye, killing him.

Hit-Girl soon catches up, sees the dead cop assassin (thinking it to be a real cop) smirks and says looks like you just made the worst mistake of your life bi***, now time to die!". Hit-Girl then slashes Hanna with her katanas. Hanna dodges and unsheathes her hunting knife. Hit-Girl laughs and taunts Hanna, but suddenly a gunshot rings through the air and Hit-Girl is thrown to the ground, as Hit-Girl was mocking Hanna, Hanna was able to reach her vektor and shoot. "A shot to the heart ota shut you up!" says Hanna.

But suddenly Hit-Girl rises and mocks Hanna about how she was wearing kevlar, she then shoots at Hanna with her H&K Compact. Hanna takes cover behind a dumpster and takes a steyr TMP from the dead assassin (and the ammo) and fires her entire magazine at Hit-Girl. Hit-Girl dodges every bullet exept for the last one which she cuts in half with her katana.

Hanna tries to reload but Hit-Girl shoots the gun out of her hand with her H&K compact. Hit-Girl then shoots Hanna in the leg. Hanna falls to the ground holding her leg. Hit-Girl walks towards Hanna with her compact and aims it at her head, "Bye bye c****ucker" says Hit-Girl. Hanna then chuckles and grabs Hit-Girl's pistol, pistol whips her with it, takes out the magazine and throws it behind her.

Hit-Girl grabs her head and says "Time to use the big gun" and starts firing rapidly at Hanna. Hanna dodges and roundhouse kicks Hit-Girl in the face. Hit-Girl reaches for her SMG but it is kicked away.Hit-Girl looks above her and sees Hanna standing above her, vektor in hand. Hit-Girl frowns and stabs Hanna's ankle with her butterfly knife. Hanna drops her pistol, but recovers from the pain and readies her knife.

The two lock eyes and prepare for a knife fight, but to Hanna's surprise Hit-Girl throws her knife but Hanna does a flip to dodge it. On the way down she slashes Hit-Girl across the face. Blood gushes out of the wound all over Hit-Girl. Your gonna pay for that you Motherf***in cu**!" yells Hit-Girl as she unsheathes her katanas. She charges Hanna and starts stabbing, slashing and kicking at her.

Hanna is knocked down with a right hook to the face, but slits Hit-Girl's hamstrings with her knife. Hanna gets up and runs behind the dumpster where she left her equippment. Hit-Girl tries to get up but is pinned down by an arrow to the stomach. Hit-Girl starts barfing blood. Hanna stands above the child vigilante and strings an arrow. "I just missed your heart." says Hanna, who then fires the arrow inbetween Hit-Girl's eyes.

Winner: Hanna Heller

Expert's Opinion[]

Hanna was victorious in this match-up due to her superior arsenal, as her advantages training, stealth, and intelligence.

To see the original battle, weapons, and votes, click here.


The battle was declared invalid because Hit-Girl was given a katana and a Heckler & Koch USP despite never using them.