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...They revealed by their violences, or by their heroisms, how different they were by other men.
— Robert M. Coates, The Outlaw Years

Micajah "Big" Harpe, born Joshua Harper, and Wiley "Little" Harpe, born William Harper, were murderers, serial killers, highwaymen, and river pirates who operated in Tennessee, Kentucky, Illinois, and Mississippi in the 18th century. Their crimes appear to have been motivated by blood lust than financial gain and they are likely America's first serial killers (reckoned from the colonial era forward).

As young men, they lived with renegade Creek and Cherokee Indians who committed atrocities against white settlers and against their own tribes. By 1797, the Harpe's lived near Knoxville, Tennessee. However, they were driven from the town after being charged with stealing hogs and horses. They were also accused of murdering a man named Johnson, who was found in a river, covered in urine, ripped open, and weighed with stones.

This became a characteristic in the Harpe's murders. They butchered anyone at the slightest provocation, even babies. R.E. Banto in The Ohio claims that Micajah even bashed his infant daughter's head against a tree because her constant crying annoyed him. This would be the only crime for which he would confess genuine remorseful. From Knoxville they fled to Kentucky. They entered the state on the Wilderness Road, near the Cumberland Gap. They are believed to have murdered a peddler named Peyton, taking his horses and some of his goods. Then they murdered two travelers from Maryland.

In July 1799, after a scuffle for a tomahawk, Big Harpe was decapitated, and his head was hung from a tree for 10 years before being stolen. Little Harpe was captured and hung in 1804.

Battle vs. Anne Bonney and Mary Read (by Elgb333)[]

In an island far away in South Carolina, a lone rowboat is seen paddling its way towards the coast. Behind them was their sloope filled with the scurviest sea pirates of the Carribean. The men bid the small dingy farewell. Inside that rowboat were two of the most infamous female pirates to have ever charted the maps, Mary Read and Anne Bonney. Inside weere their own share of treasures these two have worked hard for in years. It seems that they were already on their path to retiring from piracy, ready to settle down as two rich women, and bidding goodbye to their loyal crew.

"You gonna miss the sea Anne?" Mary asked as they paddled their way to the beach.

Anne takes a good long look back at their ship. Far away as it starts to blur from her vision and into the horizon. She looks back at Mary and says, "T'were happy times Mary. But we all know what happens to pirates like us who stay too long to this life. Happy times don't last long, and its either the noose or Davy Jones Locker if we stayed went on."

"What about Jack?"

"To Hell with Jack. He ain't no man and he surely ain't no pirate."

As the two came closer to the beach, hidden in the foliage were two frontiersmen glaring at them like scavengers. They were the infamous Micajah and Wiley Harpes. They eye the two gorgeous women with treasures coming towards them. And it made their mouths water to their beards with excitement.

"You seeing this big brother?" Wiley asked while continously pounding his rifle to the sand.

"Sure do little brother," Micajah said.

"Stabby and killy big brother?" Stably and killy?"

"Aye poke and fun, with treasure in buns. Stabby and killy little brother."

And the two insane hunters giggled like maniacs as they set up their trap. The two pirate girls dragged their rowboat to the shore. Anne and Mary carried the boxload of treasure together as they trudge into the beach. "You careful there Mary. Tis are future were carrying."

But suddenly out of nowhere, a shot rang out. Mary fell shouting to the sand as a rifle shot pierced her shoulder. Anne cried to Mary as she clutches her, but an arrow suddenly hit her in the leg and she too falls to the ground. Both girls clutched each other as two maniacs came out from the shrubbery, carrying tomahawks and rifles and dancing wildly.

"Damn little brother. You almost killed this one. Corpses are no fun ya know," Micajah said as he slaps Wiley in the head. But the two women, though scared, were not undeterred. They grabbed their pistols quickly and fired. "Die you bastards DEI!" Anne said.

The bullets hit their marks. Micajah took one in the arm and Wiley had another in his abdomen. "Damn you witch!" Micajah said as he throws his tomahawk at them. Mary quickly dodges this and draws another pistol, but the two killers bolted back into the forest. Mary then picks Anne up and the two agreed to kill these lunatics before they can retaliate.

The two girls follow the trail of blood. Their they see the two hunters desperately limping away. The two girls attacked, but Wiley manage to make them turn back with his bow. With Wiley shooting arrow after arrow, the two girls took cover behind a tree, and with a grin, Anne lits up a grenado and throws it at the brothers.

The bomb exploded and rocked the two brothers to separate direction. Though both didn't hit any shrapnels, their ears still rang due to the explosion. Stunned and defenceless, the two pirates then charged at them with their cutlass and guns. Mary tried to aim at Wiley with her blunderbuss and fired. Wiley tried to escape, but several shots shredded his back and he falls down. Mary then readies her cutlass.

Anne on the other hand, came upon Micajah with her cutlass and slashes. Micajah managed to dodge away just in time and grabbed his tomahawk. Anne then made a thrust but Micajah caught it in his tomahawk and he then punches Anne in the face. Pissed, Anne slahses wildly at Micajah non-stop, and Micajah took multiple cuts in the face and torso. But as Anne made a final thrust, Micajah dodges it and slams his tomahawk at Anne's hand, cutting it clean-off. Anne cries in pain ater losing her hand.

Mary was on the process of killing the young Harpe with her pistol, but Micajah then takes Anne hostage that gets Mary's attention. "You now drop them weapons you have or this dame gets it!" Micajah threatens.

Mary then points her pistol at Micajah, but she can only cry bitter tears as the two girls cried at the hopelessness they have. But before she can fire her pistol, Wiley suddenly knocks her out with his tomahawk. As Anne criest o her downed friend, Micajah then kicks her at the back and she too alls unconscious on the floor.

With treasures and two gorgeous women, the two monsters look at each other and grin at the luck they're having today.

Expert's Opinion[]

The Harpe brothers won this battle becuase their rifles outranged the Pirate Girls' blunderbuss and their bow outgunned their pistols. While the Pirate girls were smart tacticians, the Harpe brothers still had more training and experience that lead them to victory.

To see the original battle, weapons, and votes, click here.

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