User blog comment:Pygmy Hippo 2/Michael Myers the Shape vs. Darius the Party Hard Killer/@comment-3189283-20190321090036

Let’s see shall we Primary The Hunting Knife is certainly the more robust and combat capable weapon despite it being four inches shorter. That being said I’m giving the edge to the Kitchen Knife purely because I doubt a hunting knife is going to do much against Michael Myers’ superhuman durability.

Edge: Michael Myers

Secondary

Again, the Ninjato is the superior weapon (even if it didn’t actually exist) being longer and having a bladed edge, making it a more effective killing tool than the Claw Hammer. Once again though I’m sceptical if the Ninjato will actually do a whole lot of damage to Myers whereas a direct hit from the Claw Hammer will do some serious damage to Darius. Unlike the above edge though I’m calling it even as the Ninjato is still the better weapon.

Edge: Even

Special

The Speaker Trap is probably the only weapon that Darius has that will actually be able to take down Myers and obviously has more killing potential than the syringe. However, the fact it is already set up to explode as soon as someone gets close enough to activate it means it’s just as likely to kill one of the party goers as it is Myers. The only reason it doesn’t lose or tie this category is because the syringe is such a poor killing tool.

Edge: Darius

Final Verdict

All in all, this battle should be fairly easy for Michael Myers to win. While his weapons are overall inferior to Darius’ that isn’t much of a problem considering he can take a lot more damage than Darius. The only real way Darius is going to be able to kill him is with the Speaker Trap which as I mentioned above is guaranteed to even explode near him. Myers will certainly stand out more in the crowd and if any murders are discovered he’d probably be a more obvious suspect but even then, it’s not like the Police will really be able to stop him. Darius is basically just a normal person, not even a super strong normal person as bouncers and the police can overpower him and while he’s probably much sneakier than Myers it doesn’t matter when he doesn’t have a reliable way to kill him. Michael Myers: 4,000

Darius: 1,000