User blog comment:KevlarNinja/Zombie Hunter vs. Vampire Slayer/@comment-2136224-20101005210315/@comment-2016768-20101005211823

Narrator: Weighting in for the Zombie Hunters: Duane Jones! Duane played Ben in the black-and-white film Night of the Living Dead and is an expert on Zombie killing!

Duane: "Are you kidding me? The Zombie Hunters can take anything, and turn it into a deadly weapon. A deadly, effective weapon. We'll shred those Vampire Slayers to pieces!"

Narrator: Also bashing brains for the Zombie Hunters: Bill Overbeck! Bill is a Vietnam War veteran and grisled zombie hunter from Left 4 Dead who, along with a small group of human survivors, make a living against the Undead!

Bill: "The Vampire Slayers are very... eh... picky. They only use the best of the best weapons that require lots of training and skill. We, on the other hand," (picks up a crowbar and smashes a foam torso) "... Aren't quite so picky."

Narrator: The Zobie Hunters are sure of their man's victory! But they're facing equally confident oppponents! Fighting for the Vampire Slayers: Gabriel van Helsing! Van Helsing helped bring about the downfall of the evil vampiric Prince of Darkness in the novel Dracula!

Van Helsing: "I don't know why the Zombie Slayers would even try to fight us. We have the advantage everywhere: We're educated; we're skilled; we're trained. They clumsily kill things with... tire irons! We... we are the elite of the elite!"

Narrator: Also waging war for the Vampire Slayers: Buffy Summers! Buffy is a teenage but still deadly undead killer, who ends the horrific reign of supernatural creatures in the TV show Buffy the Vampire Slayer!

Buffy: The Vampire Slayers are cunning. The Zombie Hunters are anyone! They could be ... drunkards, high school drop-outs, anyone! To be a vampire slayer, you have to boast intelligence! And that's what will earn us victory!"

Narrator: Coming up, the Vampire Slayers bring out their long-range killing tools as the fight for title of Deadliest Warrior continues! Zombie Hunter... Vampire Slayer... Who will be the Deadliest Warrior?

Well, it took me, like, ten minutes to write that. What do you think?