User blog comment:WanderingSkull/Invisible Ties: Robin (Fire Emblem) vs. Kirito (Sword Art Online)/@comment-422690-20160425194440

So...

Swords: Robin wins, hands-down. Kirito has greater sword skill, yes, and he can potentially dual-wield, but that's not going to help him when the swords themselves are fucking awful. First off, both of Elucidator's tangs - the thingie that connects the sword blade to the handle - are exposed. While this certainly looks cool, it puts more stress on the tang itself. Obsidian's a very brittle material to begin with, meaning that if the battle takes place anywhere with actual fucking physics a single blow, from the sword or against it, will break it. Dark Repulsor is also a piece of shit, in more ways than the literal. First and foremost, it's a thrusting blade that Kirito tends to use for slashing. Coming in a close second is that the entire sword is shaped out of a single piece. This is an incredibly bad idea, especially with a crystal, because this increases the stress on the sword. Crystal is a terribad* material for a sword because all crystals have what's called a "cleavage plane." No, Appel, that has nothing to do with boobs. It means that striking the crystal along the plane will cause it to break. So Kirito's big ability, his swords, are effectively useless because they will break. Robin takes this by default, because Mystletainn won's break, and the Levin Sword isn't used like a sword; it's a tool to cast magic.

* This is pissing me off enough to use PvP forum troll slang. I take physics seriously, damnit.

Equipment: Thoron wins. Do I even need to type anything for this? Wooden spike vs lasers made of lightning. Seriously, Kirito's screwed.

Armor: Grandmaster Armor wins. I'll admit, that blackwrym longcoat is pretty fuckin' badass. Problem is, he wears it open. Meaning that whatever protection dragonhide provides, it's not covering his vitals. No protection for his heart, lungs, neck, gut, or head. Robin's Grandmaster Armor has that badass longcoat look, but also has actual steel plates to protect his vitals. Except the head. Plus, this protection never seems to slow Robin down.

Overall, I'm giving this to Robin. Kirito is totally fucked. His swords are going to break, his ranged attack is pretty much useless, and his armor doesn't protect his vitals. This is before taking skills into account; Kirito's passive heal only starts after ten seconds. That's a long time in combat. Robin's can activate on any strike or cast, and probably will activate frequently because of that 50% activation rate. Robin's other skills boost his attack power, making Kirito's black shirt even less protection against the barrage of steel and lightning coming his way. On top of that, Robin has Slow Burn. As the match goes along, Kirito's broken swords and twigs aren't even going to hit. Robin wins this with ease, because Kirito's equipment fucking sucks.

Holy damn, did I use a lot of formatting. And a lot of expletives.