Central Intelligence Agency

"And you shall know the truth and the truth shall make you free."

- Unofficial Motto

The Central Intelligence Agency, also known as the CIA, is one of the major intelligence agencies in the United States of America. In contrast to the FBI, the CIA is the nation's foreign intelligence agency, specializing in human intelligence. It is also the only US intelligence agency authorized to conduct covert operations, which it typically conducts through its Special Activities Division. It also publishes the World Factbook, an almanac-style book that contains a wealth of information about all countries in the world.

Their general effectiveness and the absolute insanity that intelligence agencies got up to in the Cold War has made them a frequent target for conspiracy theories. Further, the agency appears to be something of a bogeyman for politicians in other countries, as accusations of being CIA spies is a common pretext for executions and political smears.

Battle vs. Special Operations Executive (by The Deadliest Warrior)
SOE:

CIA:

A van pulls up outside a military complex. Two men get out, one wearing a blue shirt with a green cap (SOE 1) and the other with a red shirt and dark brown hair (SOE 2). They approach the complex but a man in guard uniform (CIA 3) steps in the way, demanding papers for entrance. SOE 2 complies and as he rummages through his briefcase SOE 1 puts a cigarette in his mouth.

"You can't smoke once you're inside," CIA 3 says gruffly.

"Don't worry," SOE 1 says snidely. "I won't." He fires off his cigarette pistol and it hits CIA 3 in the neck, killing him. SOE 2 tucks a Welgun into his coat pocket and the two head into the building, SOE 2 tossing the cigarette onto the dead CIA Agent's body.

Inside, the two SOE Agents meet up with a pretty brunette (SOE 4) and a balding man she is talking with (SOE 5). "Where's Number 3?" SOE 1 asks in a hushed voice.

"He's in there, talking to one of the Yanks," SOE 4 replies quietly. The door swings open and out walks a young man with a crisp suit on, a cigar in his mouth (SOE 3). "And they told me I couldn't smoke," whines SOE 1.

"Right." says SOE 3. "Let's go. As he starts to walk down the hall, the cigar explodes, blowing off the SOE Agent's face with it. A man (CIA 2) comes out of the﻿ room where the now-deceased SOE Agent had been talking with him and he carries a briefcase wtih him. He lifts the handle and a gunshot is heard before SOE 5 falls with a bullet hole in his neck.  SOE 4 pulls a Welgun out from her coat and shoots at the CIA Agent, riddling him with bullets and sending him to the floor, bloodied and dead.

Two more people walk into the hall as the SOE Agents retreat deeper into the complex. One, a man with a leather jacket and a MAC-10 in hand (CIA 1) signals to the other, a blonde with a MAC-10 of her own (CIA 4) to follow him. Another man behind them (CIA 5) heads down in the hallway the opposite direction.

As the SOE Agents reach a split hallway, and split in different directions, CIAs 1 and 4 turn the corner, shouting at SOE 1, "Stop!" SOE 1 calmly turns and says, "Yes?"

"We need to talk," CIA 1 says. "Follow us." As both CIA Agents turn, SOE 1 pulls out a pencil knife and jumps at CIA 1, burying the blade in his neck. CIA 4 turns and falls back as SOE 1 bears down on her, stabbing at her chest wildy. She kicks him back and tries to get up but gets stabbed in the arm. SOE 1 grins and pushes the blade deeper into her flesh, but CIA 4 pulls out her MAC10 and kills SOE 1 with a quick burst. She wipes the blood off her arm and continues down the hallway, turning right.

CIA 4 turns the corner and is barely missed by a hail of bullets from SOE Agent 4 with her Welgun. CIA 4 returns fire with the MAC-10 and the two female agents get itno a gunfight. As SOE 4's bullets run out CIA 4 takes the opportunity to finish the SOE Agent off with a quick flurry of bullets. The slain female SOE Agent gasps and falls to the floor dead. CIA 4 turns around only to see SOE 2 aiming with a crossbow at her. Her eyes widen in horror but before she can move, the crossbow bolt flies through the air and pierces her heart. She falls dead next to SOE 4.

SOE 2 quickly hurries down the hall toward the exit, slowed down by the cumbersome crossbow. As he reaches the doors and tries to step out, hands grab him from behind and pull him back into the lobby. Turning, he sees CIA 5, who he punches in the face. As the SOE Agent tries again to retreat, CIA 5 stands up quickly with a piano-wire garrote in his hands. He dives at SOE 2 and as the wire cuts through his neck, SOE 2 struggling but to no avail. He slumps dead and CIA 5 drops the body. He assesses the damage and takes out a walkie-talkie to report the attack to his superiors.

Expert's Opinoin
The CIA's more practical and combat-efficient weaponry were more effective in a firefight, whereas the SOE's weaponry focused more on design and subterfuge. The CIA also was more experienced in modern combat, while the SOE's range of operations was limited to mission-specific goals during the Second World War. The superior weapons and greater operational experience of the CIA led them to victory.

To see the original battle, weapons, and votes, click here.