User blog:BeastMan14/Anarchy in the UK: MI-13 vs Stardust Crusaders!



In our darkest hours, true heroes must come together, no matter their differences, to overcome great challenges. Tonight on Deadliest Fiction, we have a showdown between two such teams as MI-13, the government-sponsored superhero team assembled to protect England from superpowered threats, battles the Stardust Crusaders, a team of Stand users who came together to defeat the immortal vampire Dio! It'll be a test of their weapons, skills, and powers, all to determine....

WHO...IS...DEADLIEST???

MI-13
"There should be a team to hold off the dark magic and the rest. We should be that team. But here's what it has to be: a team not of intelligence officers, but of superheroes. Together because they want to be. Who are friends. Who support each other. Who do not kill."

- Captain Britain MI-13 is a British government agency designed to deal with paranormal and superpowered threats, formed after previous agency Black Air proved disloyal to the government and tried to stage a coup. Initially overseen by Alistaire Stuart, the organization would receive a massive boost in support when it was able to stop both a Martian invasion and rescue the child of a cabinet minister from fairies.

When a fanatical faction of Skrulls launched their attack on Earth, JIC Chair Mortimer Grimsdale revealed himself as one of the invaders, and Pete Wisdom was able to use this as evidence that MI-13 couldn't trust anyone with oversight and replaced Grimsdale as JIC Chair, reporting directly to the Prime Minister. As the Skrulls got closer to victory, the PM declared that every superhero of British nationality is an MI-13 reserve member, giving Wisdom the ability to call on them at a moment's notice.

The Leader = "I nearly lost everyone for you bloody addicts! No more! You are going to take responsibility for your lives. You are going to take responsibility for your dreams! You are going to stop leaving this &*$% for other people."

- Pete Wisdom

The son of a Scotland Yard detective, Pete Wisdom is a mutant with the ability to generate energy projections from his fingertips he dubbed "hot knives". These abilities made Pete immensely useful to the British government, enabling him to climb the ranks of MI-6 and Black Air, an organization dedicated to investigating and countering the threat of the supernatural. Partnered with the superhero team Excalibur, Pete would turn on Black Air when it became clear they were using the team to further their own agenda and strike up a relationship with Kitty Pryde.

Pete's adventures with superheroes would lead to him establishing a global network dedicated to protecting mutants from the intelligence community and leading X-Force, which ended when he faked his death and went back to working for the British government. Knowing that Britain was largely defenseless against the supernatural, Pete lobbied to be given control of his own agency and used the resources to form MI-13, which works directly alongside Britain's superheroes in battling threats like Martians, Skrulls, the forces of Hell, and vampires.

Powers and Abilities:
 * Energy Manipulation: Pete's mutant ability is the power to absorb ambient heat and solar radiation and release it from his fingertips. While he can just release them as bursts of energy, Pete chooses to release them as "hot knives", blades of pure thermal energy that are said to burn as hot as the Sun. On top of being effective ranged weapons, Peter also wields them like claws that can easily burn through anything.
 * Energy Shield: Pete can also shield himself using the energy, enabling him to survive a missile strike and an orbital bombardment of suicide bomber vampires fired from Dracula's base on the moon. (Long story.) He can also use the shields to control his descent, shielding him from the full damage of being thrown out of a window.
 * Brilliant Tactician: Effectively Britain's answer to Nick Fury, Pete is a renowned mastermind capable of outwitting foes such as Dracula, one of the greatest strategic minds in history, and going toe-to-toe with the reality warping David Haller and the master thief Gambit. His style of tactics tends to revolve around playing the long game, luring the opponent into a false sense of security before revealing an unforeseen twist, such as his usage of Quincy Harker's skull to wipe out Dracula's horde or releasing the captive demons in Avalon during the Skrull invasion.
 * Skilled Hand-to-Hand Combatant: While he prefers fighting from a distance, Pete is still an effective up-close combatant, capable of overpowering and killing a group of vampires with just his knives and critically injuring Colossus with a few well-placed hits.

Stardust Crusaders
"Their story has begun! Their time is running out! They will finish this! They won't stop! CRUSADERS!"

- Excerpt from the translation of "JoJo Sono Chi no Kioku ~end of THE WORLD~" Following the arrest of his grandson Jotaro and the return of Dio Brando, the family's sworn enemy, Joseph Joestar, accompanied by his friend Mohammad Avdol, travels to Japan to explain the situation to his family. Upon his arrival, Joseph explained to Jotaro that he had gained a Stand, a manifestation of the individual's fighting spirit, which was caused by the return of Dio, and Joseph intended to travel to Egypt to kill Dio once and for all. Before the trio could leave, Jotaro defeated Noriaki Kakyoin, one of Dio's minions, and freed him from Dio's control. Now a quartet, the group departed for Egypt, Dio's hiding place, with the intention of killing him before Joseph's daughter and Jotaro's mother Holy died from her Stand.

Along the way, the group defeated and recruited Jean-Pierre Polnareff, a Frenchman whose sister was murdered by one of Dio's henchmen, and Iggy, a Boston Terrier that had gained the power to use a Stand. After fighting a variety of killers and monsters, the group finally assaulted Dio's mansion in Cairo, with Avdol and Iggy dying at the hands of Dio's right-hand man Vanilla Ice and Kakyoin being killed by Dio's Stand The World. After Dio seemingly killed Joseph and knocked out Polnareff, Jotaro was able to kill him and revive Joseph, and the group went their separate ways.

The Leader = "Well, I guess now you can see the difference in our fighting experience. Once your opponent started boasting their victory, they've already lost! This is how Joseph Joestar does things! I guess I just get better with age. And! A Stand can only be defeated by a Stand! Your next line is, 'Stop, anything but that!'"

- Joseph Joestar

Fifty years after his victory over the Pillar Men, Joseph Joestar became aware of Stands when his own, Hermit Purple, manifested. Recruiting fortune teller Mohammed Avdol, a fellow Stand user who had run afoul of Dio, Joseph traveled to Japan and bailed his grandson Jotaro out of jail and explain the situation to him. Using the resources of the Speedwagon Foundation and with the help of the other Crusaders, Joseph set out for Egypt, intending to destroy Dio, both to save his daughter and avenge his grandfather.

Powers and Abilities:
 * Hermit Purple: Joseph's Stand is Hermit Purple, which takes the form of purple, thorny vines summoned through his hand.
 * Psychic Channeling: Hermit Purple's main ability is the power to divine information, though Joseph needs some form of visual format in order to present the info to others. It can generate psychic photos at the cost of destroying a camera, create video messages out of spliced-up audio, and even manipulate the environment to create images such as maps out of dirt.
 * Grappling: Joseph can also use Hermit Purple as an improvised weapon, holding opponents in place or choking them, or even outright wrapping them around his fists to use as improvised brass knuckles. During the battle in Cairo, Joseph was even able to swing across rooftops with them.
 * Hamon Mastery: Joseph inherited his talents with Hamon, an energy from the ancient martial arts, from his grandfather and mother, and he's one of the most talented wielders of it in the world, having used it alongside his natural talents to defeat all three of the Pillar Men and wield several techniques.
 * Hamon Infusion: Joseph can channel Hamon into an object for a variety of purposes, from sending a destructive pulse of energy through it and into a target or forming a wall of energy that can block attacks or projectiles. Hermit Purple is naturally conductive as well, enabling Joseph to transfer Hamon through it's vines.
 * Hamon Attacks: Joseph can also channel his Hamon throughout his body, enabling him to land powerful strikes, such as the Zoom Punch (where he dislocates his shoulder to land an attack from a further distance) or Overdrive (channeling his Hamon into his hand to land a chop that was capable of destroying the arm of Kars.)
 * Skilled Hand-to-Hand Fighter: Much of Joseph's fighting style in his older age is based off of his quick wit and surprising agility, to the point where he was able to briefly hold his own against Dio.
 * Genius Trickster/Improviser: Joseph's greatest asset in combat is his surprisingly brilliant eye as a tactician and thinker, which enables him to regularly defeat opponents who underestimated his intelligence. His favored tactic is to unnerve his opponents by predicting their moves and what they will say next, alongside tricking them into letting their guard down by springing an easily defused trap, then revealing his true plan. When his regular plans fail, Joseph is often able to quickly improvise a new one, often by running away to lure the enemy to him while he scans the environment for new tricks.

"I beat the crap out of more people than I have to. Some are still in the hospital. There’s plenty of teachers that got on my bad side and never came back to class. And, hey, I make it a policy not to pay if I don't like a meal. But even a guy like me can spot evil when he sees it!"
 * -| The Bruiser =

- Jotaro Kujo

The rebellious grandson of Joseph, Jotaro Kujo became convinced he was possessed by an evil spirit after he savagely beat an entire gang. Afraid that he may end up hurting someone else, Jotaro turned himself into the police and refused to leave the jail. It wasn't until Joseph and Avdol explained that the spirit was simply Jotaro's Stand, Star Platinum, manifesting that he would leave the jail, and he set out alongside the other Crusaders to defeat Dio.

During the final battle with Dio, Jotaro was the last member of the team left standing, and engaged in a vicious fight with the vampire, defeating him by using his own time-stop power against him and destroying him.

Powers and Abilities: "Well, you're about to fall down to Hell, sobbing the whole way down. But there's one thing I can't rely on the guardians of Hell to do for me. And that's... To turn you into a pincushion!"
 * Star Platinum: Jotaro's Stand is Star Platinum, which manifests as a purple, muscular humanoid with long hair. Despite it's limited range, Star Platinum is one of the most powerful Stands in existence, with a wide variety of abilities.
 * Superhuman Strength: Star Platinum is incredibly strong, capable of lifting a Jeep carrying five people and hurling it with one hand and breaking through the diamond-hard teeth of Empress. It was even capable of briefly holding back a road roller being piled on top of Jotaro by Dio.
 * Superhuman Speed: Star Platinum is fast enough to catch a bullet at point-blank range and throw hundreds of punches in a matter of seconds.
 * Superhuman Sight/Precision: Despite it's muscular appearance, Star Platinum can be incredibly precise, able to surgically operate on Kakyoin using just it's fingers without any harm and keep track of a deck of a cards when it was being shuffled by Daniel D'Arby. Jotaro is able to tap into this eyesight as well, as he was able to see across four kilometers and aim and throw a rock with incredible accuracy across that distance.
 * Self-Preservation: Star Platinum appears to have some form of self-awareness, as it actively protects Jotaro from danger in scenarios where he either can't or won't help himself. It caught a bullet fired at Jotaro at point-blank range, protected him from Dio's time stop, and was even able to keep him alive by pumping his heart.
 * Star Finger: Star Platinum can forcefully extend it's middle and index to a length of one or two meters to sneak attack enemies by stabbing them.
 * Abnormal Strength/Durability: Even without his Stand, Jotaro is surprisingly tough. He's an accomplished brawler, regularly putting people in the hospital and savagely beating a fully grown man when he was reduced to the size and age of a child. In terms of durability, he was able to take a ceiling fan directly to the shoulder and react with annoyance rather than any real pain.
 * Skilled Improviser/Bluffer: Jotaro has inherited some of his grandfather's wit, and has regularly defeated seemingly impossible foes by outwitting them. He managed to outbluff both of the D'Arbys and even outwitted Dio by using time stop against him.
 * -| The Swordsman =

- Jean-Pierre Polnareff

A lifelong user of the Stand Silver Chariot, Jean-Pierre Polnareff's life was forever changed following the brutal rape and murder of his sister at the hands of a man with two right hands. Training extensively, Polnareff set out to avenge his sister, and his quest for vengeance put him directly into the path of Dio, who brainwashed him and sent him to kill the Stardust Crusaders. Ambushing the group in Hong Kong, Polnareff was defeated by Avdol and recruited to the team after they freed him from the brainwashing. Grateful, Polnareff embarked on the quest and managed to avenge his sister by killing her murderer, one of Dio's minions.

Powers and Abilities: "I bet I'll never have any friends. I'm positive of it because nobody but me can see my Hierophant Green. If they can't see him, how can they ever understand me? That's what I thought until I met Joseph, Jotaro, Polnareff, and Avdol. I wonder why the hairs on my back stand up when I think of Avdol and Iggy? It's probably because they were my first friends, and we share a common goal. To defeat Dio together!"
 * Silver Chariot: Polnareff's Stand is Silver Chariot, which takes the form of a humanoid resembling a knight wielding a rapier, which is it's main form of attack. It's able to move a few meters away from Polnareff, but struggles with being unable to see anything he can't.
 * Superhuman Speed: Silver Chariot is incredibly fast, capable of cutting bullets out of the air and keeping up with the rapid attacks of Star Platinum with ease. If it removes it's armor, it becomes even faster, capable of moving so quickly, it creates afterimages, though the trade-off is that it's more vulnerable to attack.
 * Superhuman Precision: Silver Chariot is so precise that it can expertly line up and skewer five coins falling through the air and easily deflect bullets. It can use this precision to line up shots with the sword shot, meaning an initial miss can be redirected to a sneak attack.
 * Armor: Silver Chariot is clad in a suit of heavy armor that protects it (and by extension Polnareff) from harm. It does, however, slightly hamper Silver Chariot's speed and prevent Polnareff from seeing through it's eyes, which limits his ability to fight opponents out of his eyesight.
 * Sword Shot: As a last ditch attack, Silver Chariot can fire the blade of it's rapier at the enemy with enough force to ricochet off of walls and pierce skin. The downside is that doing this leaves Silver Chariot without a weapon until it either retrieves the blade or is unsummoned by Polnareff.
 * -| Support =

- Noriaki Kakyoin

Noriaki Kakyoin developed his Stand, Hierophant Green, at a young age and became withdrawn, struggling with socialization and making friends because no one else could see his Stand. Growing up a loner, Kakyoin was brainwashed by Dio and sent to kill Jotaro at school, but failed. Jotaro spared him and ripped the flesh bud from his head, breaking the mind control. Vengeful, Kakyoin joined the mission to kill Dio, both for himself and to save Jotaro's mother.

During the final battle with Dio, Kakyoin confronted him alone and seemingly ensnared him with Heirophant Green, hoping to keep him trapped long enough to figure out his Stand's power. Using his time stop, Dio was able to easily dodge it and punch a hole clean through Kakyoin's chest. Dying, Kakyoin was able to use the last of his strength to destroy a nearby clock, giving Joseph a hint he needed to figure out what Dio's power was.

Powers and Abilities: "”Mohammed Avdol is alive.” This is bad news. Shouldn’t you hurry and tell DIO and your other Stand user buddies about it?"
 * Hierpohant Green: Kakyoin's Stand is Heirophant Green, which is a humanoid green figure with robotic pieces across it's upper body and a long coil in the place of legs. It is a long-range Stand, capable of traveling a fair distance from Kakyoin (anywhere between 20 to 100 meters) to attack and lay traps.
 * Coiled Body: Heirophant Green's body is a group of connected tentacles and membranes, and it can unravel itself to avoid being damaged, tying enemies up, or setting them up as a series of tripwires that can attack automatically if disturbed.
 * Marionette Control: Heirophant Green can extend it's coils inside of another human's body, giving Kakyoin complete control of them. While it's an effective ability against opponents afraid to harm innocents, Kakyoin's sense of morality means he's not willing to use this unless he's out of options.
 * Emerald Splash: Heirophant's go-to attack is gathering energy into it's body before firing it off in the form of emeralds in a shotgun-like blast that can be repeated in quick succession. Kakyoin can also fire it in a 360 degree angle, as evidenced during the battle in Cairo.
 * -| Fire Wielder =

- Avdol

An Egyptian fortuneteller who was personally approached by Dio Brando but managed to escape, Mohammed Avdol worked as an advisor to Joseph and the Crusaders, teaching them about Stands and the various cultures they encountered. While in India, Avdol intervened in a fight between Polnareff, Hol Horse, and J. Geil, the man who murdered Polnareff's sister, and was seemingly killed, only to have actually faked his death so he could recover from his wounds.

In Cairo, Avdol's contacts enabled them to discover Dio's mansion, and the group was split into two groups, with Joseph, Jotaro, and Kakyoin battling Telence T. D'Arby while the others were told to burn the mansion down if they didn't down. Realizing it was too large to burn from the outside, Avdol led Polnareff and Iggy into the mansion and was subsequently the first victim of Vanilla Ice, sacrificing himself to ensure Polnareff and Iggy would survive.

Powers and Abilities: "His name is Iggy. He likes to tear out human hair by the mouthful. Oh I just remembered. While's he's ripping out hair he likes to...fart in the human's face. He's kind of vulgar."
 * Magician's Red: Avdol's Stand is Magician's Red, a muscular humanoid with a red bird head that is usually shrouded in flame.
 * Fire Creation/Manipulation: Magician's Red has the ability to create and control fire hot enough to melt metal and easily slice through train tracks. Avdol can manipulate these flames to form shapes, change direction mid-air, and even control how intense the flames burn. His favorite attack is the Hurricane Crossfire, which shoots flaming ankhs that he can control and redirect. He can also use the flames to bind an opponent, tying their hands together and depriving them of oxygen. He can also create a life detector, enabling him to detect when enemies are nearby.
 * Superhuman Strength/Speed: Magician's Red is also very powerful physically, capable of holding it's own with both Star Platinum and Silver Chariot and shattering the armor of Judgement with a single kick.
 * -| The Recruit =

- Iggy

Iggy was a Boston Terrier who had lived for most of his life on the streets of New York, becoming "King of the Dogs" thanks to his Stand, the Fool. Rowdy and anti-social, he was eventually captured by Avdol and Joseph, who had him flown to Egypt, as he would prove to be a vital asset for the team. While his behavior often made him as much a liability as he was an ally, Iggy eventually grew a little bit fond of the team, and he would sacrifice himself during the battle with Vanilla Ice to save Polnareff, who used the opportunity to kill Ice personally, avenging both of his friends.

Powers and Abilities:
 * The Fool: Iggy's Stand is the Fool, a Stand with no true physical appearance, though Iggy manifests it as a mechanical doglike creature with wheels instead of back legs and a glowing tribal mask. Instead of having a true form, The Fool is formed by sand and dust particles.
 * Sand Manifestation: Iggy can use the Fool to form whatever he wants from the environment around him and can control the sand/dust drawn into this form, such as being immune to being soaked by water or changing the density so it becomes rock hard. Because the form is being drawn from the Sand rather than Iggy himself, hurting the sand forms does nothing to Iggy.
 * Shapeshifting: The Fool can also create fake versions of people that are so accurate that they can fool close friends or allies of the person. Using this shapeshifting enabled Iggy to briefly fool Vanilla Ice into thinking Dio, someone the dog had never met, was in the room with him.
 * Weapon/Tool Creation: Iggy can create various barriers or tools out of the sand as well, such as the glider he used during the fight with N'Doul or the dome that protected him from Pet Shop.
 * Superhuman Strength: The Fool's dog form is surprisingly strong, capable of smashing through a stone pillar with ease.
 * Dog Senses: Iggy has a superb sense of both hearing and smell that enables him to detect threats and track people much easier than a normal human could. Using these senses enabled him to avoid N'Doul's attack on the Crusaders car before it happened.

Explanations

 * MI-13 technically functioned longer than the Crusaders did, but they were similar to the Avengers in that they only came together when there was a major threat that required a full team effort. The Crusaders traveled together, becoming close friends over the course of the adventure, alongside battling more varied opponents in the form of Dio's minions.
 * MI-13 takes this one fairly handily due to the decades-long careers of adventuring and heroism from it's various members with the exception of Faiza, who still has some impressive feats under her belt. The Crusaders, outside of Joseph, had mostly never faced any major threats on their own until they came together as a team.
 * MI-13 is much better at working as a cohesive unit than the Crusaders, often working in groups off of orders from Pete. By comparison, the Crusaders members tended to fight on their own over the course of their adventure, rarely teaming up unless it was a situation where they had to.
 * While some of MI-13's membership is perfectly willing to kill, they tend to avoid it unless it's against an otherworldly threat. The Crusaders are opposed to harming innocent people or bystanders, but they're otherwise perfectly willing to savagely beat and kill any enemies in their way.