User blog comment:Wassboss/I'm too Shrexy for my Shirt: Gaston vs Prince Charming/@comment-4661256-20161123221722

El Alamein's "Dissenting Opinion" Edges:

 Close Range: Hunting Knife vs. Longsword/Axe:  The longsword and axe both have more reach and larger blades than the hunting knife, as well as more weight, which will allow for more powerful strikes. That said, the hunting knife does have quite a few advantages (besides being wielded by someone who's not a pissy little bitch like Prince Charming). The closer up Gaston gets, the easier it will be for him to use the shorter blade length against Prince Charming (where the longer blade of the sword/axe will work against him). In addition, a knife is an excellent weapon to penetrate the weak points of plate armor (like the armpits, groin, and neck areas), so if Charming is suited up Gaston can still kill him. I still have to give the edge to the sword (not the Labrys axe, because that type of double-headed axe is stupid and nobody would use that for anything besides executions) simply because it's generally more practical for a standard combat situation.

Edge: Prince Charming

 Mid Range: Blunderbuss/Hunting Bow vs. Crossbow:  Honestly, either one of Gaston's ranged weapons would have gotten the edge over the crossbow, but when you combine the two it's a laughable curbstomp. The blunderbuss is OP'd to the max thanks to cartoon physics (semi-automatic firing will decimate Charming's crew), but even if it was a normal blunderbuss, its psychological value alone would be enough to scare a pissy little bitch like Charming. The hunting bow is practical, with a faster rate of fire and higher skill requirement on the part of the user when compared to the crossbow. Gaston is quite familiar with both of these weapons as a hunter, whereas Prince Charming barely used a crossbow, and he did so for a non-combat purpose.

Edge: Gaston

 Henchmen: Villagers vs. Bandits and Villains:  I'm going to give the edge to the villagers. The bandits and villains might seem tougher on the surface, since they're pirates and witches and evil bad guys from fairy tales--but the thing is, they're all a bunch of sissies. They don't really want to fight. In Shrek the Third (yes, sadly, I've seen that film) they were convinced to lay down their arms by a guy who just talked to them. If the X-Factor of Killer Instinct was included they'd lose hard. Sure, the villagers got their asses kicked by sentient furniture, but in their defense they put up a serious fight before they retreated. In addition, their performance will be bolstered significantly by Gaston's presence, whereas Prince Charming is no leader and no fighter. In my opinion, Gaston's bringing the better force to the fight.

Edge: Gaston

WINNER: GASTON

Prince Charming is a pissy little bitch who doesn't know how to fight and doesn't know how to lead. He's a scheming manipulator and a backstabber, sure, but while those skills make for a good villain, they don't make for a good fighter or warrior. Gaston is much stronger than Charming, as well as more experienced with his weapons. What it ultimately comes down to, for me, is their leadership skills. I really don't see Charming as anything more than a political agitator who absolutely failed to keep the loyalty of his crew when confronted by a pacifist. Gaston actually organized a raiding party to storm the Beast's castle, and he nearly killed the Beast in hand-to-hand combat, only losing because of an environmental hazard (namely, falling off the side of a castle). I know that at this point Prince Charming has the impetus with votes, but at the very least I'd like to voice my strong disagreement that he could beat anyone (expect for maybe Sun Tzu) in a fight.